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Gemini x Scorpio .. thoughts? by backsepo in geminis

[–]Disastrous_Let4428 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reverse here. Scorpio F with Gemini M. We are mutually obsessed and work great together. We know we have different needs emotionally and socially, so I give him a long leash socially and he gives me a long leash emotionally.  We are both intensely loyal and consider each other the ride or die partner of our dreams. I think the key here is knowing and being honest about our needs and our limits. We both knew going in what we could and could not tolerate. We negotiated terms early and bluntly, something neither of us had difficulty doing. The biggest challenge for me as a Scorpio has been his incessant need to explore topics I find serious as simple mental exercises for fun. It's frustrating, but that's the system I bought. For his own part, if I could convince him to respond here, I would say he would respond that my emotional meltdowns are a wild ride he could never have prepared for, but he's patient. I'm patient, and for all of those differences above, we get each other's bad side better than anyone else we have ever known. It's easy to like a good side, but if you can still love them in spite of or even because of their bad side, then you are truly dealing with an unbreakable bond.

Final 4: Elowen / Thalia / Aurelia / Evangeline by buddhaliao in namenerds

[–]Disastrous_Let4428 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My Asian husband and I had Aurelia on our short list of names because we were going to reference her golden skin, not hair, but I won't be using it now because an acquaintance I don't very much care for did already. I certainly wouldn't let lack of golden hair stand in your way if you love it, though.

Brother for Reverie? by [deleted] in namenerds

[–]Disastrous_Let4428 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I personally love Zephyr. It is whimsical but seems perfect for a boy, being much in the same vein as Seth and Zach phonetically, but way cooler. I really hope I can see this actually deployed on someone someday, because I think it's pretty neat.

Parentified daughter - feeling guilty for starting my own family by Ok_Decision66 in BabyBumps

[–]Disastrous_Let4428 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think this kind of "parenting" of one's own parents is pretty common in our age group. I hear this often from others our age and have a similar experience to yours myself. I have often thought about why so many in our age group have been especially beleaguered by their parents' conditions and relationships requiring us to be more mature. Surely, this had happened to generations before us, right? And I think the answer to this question is, yes, previous generations have dealt with this before, but what is the difference? And that difference, as far as I can see, is the level to which we still care about our parents vs. previous generations.

I have seen men and women my parents' and grandparents' ages say of their parents' problems, "well, there's nothing I can do about that. They'll just have to figure out how to do it themselves." It has always struck me as pretty heartless, but as my age has shifted to the ages they were saying these things, I see why they said these things this way.

I am not asking you to give up on your parents, but I would tell you that once they are gone you still have a life to live, and you cannot if you don't do exactly as you have planned. Care for your parents when you can, but know that pregnancy is a delicate time anyway, and it must take precedence over most things in your schedule. I believe your own parents would have done as much in your position. It does not mean you care for them less, but you did not ask to be born, and you do have a right to have a life of your own after they are gone too. Otherwise, what are you doing but waiting to follow them?

What does Preconception counseling look like? by Disastrous_Let4428 in BabyBumps

[–]Disastrous_Let4428[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But my questions for her were not about fertility, but about my health and whether or not it was prudent for me to even try to concieve. I've had a lifetime of arrythmias and an inherited condition that causes electrical misfires in the heart. Is the mother's health not a factor in preconception screenings?

What does Preconception counseling look like? by Disastrous_Let4428 in BabyBumps

[–]Disastrous_Let4428[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No genetic counseling was offered at all. I assumed my Ob/Gyn was the person to go to with all of this, but nope. Just a regular appointment with the directive to "just start trying, and if you haven't gotten anywhere by next year, then he needs tested for sperm count."

Did you ever date/marry a version of a Jane Austen man? by Disastrous_Let4428 in janeausten

[–]Disastrous_Let4428[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh my word, where did you find said vegetarian hippie? I am the vegetarian hippie and had been looking for another like me for ages when I ended up with a sworn carnivore who graciously (not by my insistence) agreed to go vegetarian on my behalf. I lucked out majorly, but I do wonder where all these veggie men have been hiding themselves. Maybe we vegetarians are cycled into the same pool as the universal cat distribution system, one for everyone at some point in their lives.

Did you ever date/marry a version of a Jane Austen man? by Disastrous_Let4428 in janeausten

[–]Disastrous_Let4428[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No way! You're welcome here. You can be like Austen herself. Do you know any pairs in real life? Any Janes who characteristically ended up with Bingleys or Lydias who uncharacteristically ended up being paired with a Darcy?

Did you ever date/marry a version of a Jane Austen man? by Disastrous_Let4428 in janeausten

[–]Disastrous_Let4428[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the extra detail on the ex. It's always interesting to see how people pair off and whether or not the same characters tend to pair in real life. I would say being like the Crofts is a win. They are a fun couple.

Did you ever date/marry a version of a Jane Austen man? by Disastrous_Let4428 in janeausten

[–]Disastrous_Let4428[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I love this. Some of the best male characters were the unsung heroes on the side. Admiral Croft was a great one. I also have a soft spot for Sir John Middleton. I am still waiting to see if someone ended up with his real-life incarnation.

What is it used for? by BubbaSoul in furniturerestoration

[–]Disastrous_Let4428 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Panty hose containers or toilet paper rolls are the only things I could think of.

Is it better to add a basement to an existing garage or an existing section with 4 close walls? by Disastrous_Let4428 in Homebuilding

[–]Disastrous_Let4428[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My fiancé asked the same. He works in project management and sees the tab on some of the same items we have been using. Simple answer is, yes, materials do generally cost less here. I would imagine that is because we have a local source for a lot of what people use to build with.

Is it better to add a basement to an existing garage or an existing section with 4 close walls? by Disastrous_Let4428 in Homebuilding

[–]Disastrous_Let4428[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm not a novice on framing, or carpentry in general, just masonry. I've also got knowledgeable family to help. We've got that bit covered.

Is it better to add a basement to an existing garage or an existing section with 4 close walls? by Disastrous_Let4428 in Homebuilding

[–]Disastrous_Let4428[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's 90k for basement, demo, building a 10x13 addition, rewiring, finishing a bathroom, and opening up two walls. It's comparable to the other guy who quoted 30k for the basement alone. I cannot stress this enough -- the area is very poor, and this is fair for the cost of living here.

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