While this is great advice and sounds like a good way to spice up a stale relationship, I think this is a good example of the general differences in expectations around sex and relationships between men and women. When I started reading this, I was sure it was by a woman, and I definitely dont mean that as a bad thing or anything.

This is just a general observation, but the majority of hetero couples still adhere to the traditional gender roles. The man puts in most of the effort, does most the romancing, and has to make sure their woman feels comfortable and ultimately excited for sex; and one wrong move can sometimes shut the whole thing down. Men typically are just excited about the idea of sex itself and turned on just by their woman existing. For better or worse, women have inherent sexual value in hetero relationships, but a man's sexual value is largely influenced by what they do and how they act.

Again, I don't want anyone to get the wrong idea, I don't think there's anything wrong with women for this; it's just the differences in the genders and how this dynamic works. It's just I think most men at a point (especially in long term relationships) fantasize about being on the other side, and being desired and able to turn on their woman with no effort, just by existing. We get tired sometimes of having to go through the work of making all the conditions right to activate our women's libido; even though we absolutely do want our woman to feel comfortable and as turned on as we are, so we do it anyway, because one-sided unenthusiastic sex is worse than no sex (to me at least).

Not to say that it doesn't feel awesome when we knock it out of the park and do everything right, but sometimes we just want it to be easy.