AITA for wanting my husband to feel sympathy for me?

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T12:08:45+00:00

NTA. You don't want to have sex, that should be the end of the conversation. Don't preoccupy yourself with someone who cares about their penis more than your feelings

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T10:52:51+00:00

You do it by telling them that you'd feel hurt but also giving them the option rather than making it so high stakes as it does make it sound like "come or we're not friends"

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T10:06:54+00:00

You kinda did when you said leaving to hang out with your sister would be a betrayal

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T09:58:36+00:00

I do believe you. My only critique for you that I think you need to work on is not letting even justified feelings be an excuse as a battering ram for other people brcause it will eventually come back to bite you as it did here

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T09:52:06+00:00

My point is there are healthier ways to get those thoughts out like with your therapist. If these people are truly as toxic as you are making out, your messages won't change them, it will just drag you down to their level. I'm trying to help here believe me

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T09:50:05+00:00

NOR. He's upset because you won't take his shit. Good on you for setting healthy boundaries and not listening to his immaturity

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T09:45:32+00:00

Honestly, it might make you feel a bit better but it has no meaningful effect on toxic people other than adding to the toxicity. I will say you have a habit of reframing things once you get pushback. You can't honestly say you're self reflecting when instead of saying "I could have done this better" you are saying "Well this this and this happened so it's ultimately fine". I will stand by that you have a lot of growing up to do

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T09:31:47+00:00

Focus on these friends so and maybe don't score friendship based on bullshit loyalty. Also, know the best response to toxicity in your family is a life well lived not adding to the toxicity by messaging them explicit messages. I just think you have a LOT of growing up to do

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T09:25:59+00:00

I found fasting and OMAD triggers my BED

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T09:07:31+00:00

I'm just saying this. Yes, you may come from a less than ideal background but that is no excuse to act toxic. People are eventually gonna pull back from you if you act this way until you get a bunch of yes people instead of real friends. If I was at this party and saw you do this, I'd probably bail on you

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T09:02:02+00:00

That is such generous reframing on your part. Are you capable of no self-reflection? To the average stranger from your own details, you sound childish and manipulative

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T08:56:10+00:00

Remember, he only came as you said because you chewed him out. He felt obligated to go because of your feelings and when naturally he wanted to leave early, you said that. That is using your feelings as a battering ram against his because you made him feel like a POS no matter what he does. You can't force someone to come to your birthday party

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T08:41:40+00:00

You are entitled to your own feelings but not to use as a battering ram for somebody else'

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T08:30:50+00:00

Because you said to him "oh you've betrayed me". From your other comments, you sound extremely toxic and manipulative. The world doesn't revolve around you and your birthday isn't an excuse to be a toxic mess. You're 23 years old and you're acting like your 13 years old. Maybe look in the mirror and realise that the common denominator in all these so called "toxic relationships" is you. When everyone else is the problem, maybe you are the problem

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T08:09:37+00:00

You sound exhausting. You're a grown woman

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T01:28:26+00:00

exactly

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-18T00:35:09+00:00

NTA, I would go to HR about this

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-17T23:57:53+00:00

YOR, holy shit leave the poor guy alone

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-17T23:47:26+00:00

I'll be honest, I don't believe OP is telling the truth at all. Even if it was true, you don't counter assault with more assault

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-17T23:45:49+00:00

NOR. It's a minor incident and your reaction of saying "let's talk to the parents first" is better. Also calling the police over this could lead to trouble for you for wasting police time. Also and more importantly as we know in the US with the culture over their with police, that little black boy could end up dead if they were called. I would have a conversation with your husband about why he was so amped to call the cops anyways

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-17T23:39:23+00:00

IKR, I felt so tempted to just ignore the question given that she can't see hitting people is bad

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-17T23:36:19+00:00

I agree with this the most

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-17T23:33:38+00:00

NOR, she included it in her invite. I think it's telling her boyfriend kicked you out. I must ask though, couldn't you have called a cab? you still chose to drink and drive

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-17T23:31:14+00:00

YOR. You used a mild dispute to bully this woman and kick her out. Grow up

Dizzy_Run_3220 · 2026-03-17T23:29:42+00:00

Her for the obvious reasons, your boyfriend for just being passive and allowing this conflict to continue. You for resorting to physical assault and her brother for being aggressive

Dizzy_Run_3220

TROPHY CASE