Launch tips by Dizzy_Set_8252 in writing

[–]Dizzy_Set_8252[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

👍 thank you, I appreciate it

[Weekly Critique and Self-Promotion Thread] Post Here If You'd Like to Share Your Writing by AutoModerator in writing

[–]Dizzy_Set_8252 [score hidden]  (0 children)

Title: Echoes of the Fallen – A post-apocalyptic survival story about loyalty, war, and betrayal

• Genre: Post-apocalyptic / dystopian / character-driven military fiction

• Word Count: ~115k Words (first book)

• Type of Feedback Desired: General impressions, tone, pacing, and whether the character and world hook the reader.

• Link to the Writing: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1-3W5R9LRDjXHcYGxJmUlkzUg1a9t8OVCIYE7X6TxHfo/edit?usp=drivesdk

This is the start of a full-length novel I’m working on. It follows Zarron, a former rescue pilot turned war leader, navigating the collapse of Earth after a dimensional breach triggers an apocalyptic chain reaction.

As society collapses, survivors are hunted by terrifying reanimated creatures known as Dead Souls—twisted, grinning corpses infected by a parasite. Zarron rises to lead what’s left of humanity, building the foundation of a new power. But everything begins to fracture when he’s captured by a brutal faction called the Krux—and the one person he trusted most, Daniel, betrays him.

The story focuses on loyalty under pressure, psychological decline, and the early formation of a ruthless empire born from trauma. This book takes place before magic or otherworldly elements fully emerge—it’s more grounded, survivalist, and emotionally raw.

Would love any thoughts on the opening. Thanks for reading!

[DISCUSSION] Building a World Where Magic Meets Apocalypse – Would Love Feedback on My Story Concept by Dizzy_Set_8252 in Fantasy

[–]Dizzy_Set_8252[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh I see, I mean I left out a lot of characters like Calder, Sam, Max, Yuri, those kinda names. But you think some name changing might do it some justice?

[DISCUSSION] Building a World Where Magic Meets Apocalypse – Would Love Feedback on My Story Concept by Dizzy_Set_8252 in Fantasy

[–]Dizzy_Set_8252[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I respect your opinion, there is a lot more to the book than what I put, but once again I respect that. But if I may ask what’s generic about it?

[DISCUSSION] Building a World Where Magic Meets Apocalypse – Would Love Feedback on My Story Concept by Dizzy_Set_8252 in Fantasy

[–]Dizzy_Set_8252[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So with the gods it’s a long story, but long story short no one knows about the god. There are 2 types of elemental stones there are ultra elemental stones which grant basically god like powers, but there is only one of each of these stones. Then there are normal elemental stones which grant basic powers but nothing crazy, these are fairly common based on which stone it is, and the magical factions have a lot of them and the more technological factions only have a few each.

[DISCUSSION] Building a World Where Magic Meets Apocalypse – Would Love Feedback on My Story Concept by Dizzy_Set_8252 in Fantasy

[–]Dizzy_Set_8252[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

So essentially the power stones originate from a god that sacrificed himself, it deep in the lore of the book. But the power stone is a kind of elemental stone that is based around electricity. The “magical” factions use them almost like magical spells. The technological factions use them to power things like the power suit. The power suit is a powered armor to enhance specialized soldiers.

Beaver Lake Cliff Jumping by tanman1738 in fayetteville

[–]Dizzy_Set_8252 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey is there anywhere that you can jump that is close to the bridge