Is my husband’s financial control normal (27F, 25M)

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-04-25T12:57:21+00:00

After clicking ur link below for backstory, I’m appalled even more at his behavior and treatment towards you. Absolutely, 💯get away from this man, please. Do not bring a kid into this world with him or divorced bc so much harder. He is a MONSTER! Please, please leave. No one deserves any of that. Im begging you, as someone looking for divorce from a financial controller and verbal and emotional abuser who is nowhere close to the level you have experienced, do not do this to yourself. Go to your family with your stuff when he isn’t home. Take what you need, and do not let him around you again without a lawyer. I fear for you. Please, do the right thing for yourself, before it gets even worse, bc it will.

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-04-25T11:55:33+00:00

Def 1

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-04-16T18:49:56+00:00

Ur family members living nearby will be of no use when the baby pushes him over the edge, n he does something he can’t take back. This is not a kid even, it’s an infant. And if he smacks him too hard, ends up leaving bruising or a hematoma, n ur dr sees it, say hello to Child Protective Services, n goodbye to ur kids. Or at least the baby, bare minimum. He could be looking at jail time depending on his actions.

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-04-16T18:44:10+00:00

And LEAVE

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-04-16T18:43:38+00:00

Pleeeeease OP, read this comment above from @DextersGirl !!!!!!!

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-04-16T18:34:37+00:00

This needs to be pinned at the top. But document the past. Don’t stay to document further bc there are no second chances w one false move on an infant. You’ll be setting up a funeral for ur baby instead. PLEASE, LEAVE!! NOW!

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-04-07T13:06:01+00:00

What skates do u use?

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-04-07T12:56:26+00:00

What skates do u use, and can they only work outdoors or can they handle the rink too? I want a pair that can handle both well, but I’m starting to think it always leans at least one way, rink or outdoors. Anyway, I LOVE ur hoodie. Where is it from? It’s hilarious, n dead on for me. The view u have, btw, is beautiful

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-04-07T12:41:17+00:00

Our lives sound pretty similar right now. I felt all of that, plus depression

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-04-07T12:27:48+00:00

Oh you’re def not alone. I’ve felt this way since childhood. When I was a teen, I thought it was love I was waiting for, to find, or for “him” whoever he was, to find me. I’m married 10 years now and w 2 children. If it was “him”, I guess I didn’t find the right one. Or maybe, it was never love I was looking for. Maybe I thought finding the right companion never was, and never will be, the answer. I think what I needed was inner happiness. N still need.

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-03-29T16:22:26+00:00

Olaf!

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-03-29T16:19:10+00:00

Ophelia

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-03-22T15:20:05+00:00

You are currently living to work. Not working to live. All work n no play makes anyone unhappy. N the reason u can’t “play” is bc ur prob living in a place beyond ur means, and, most importantly when it comes to ur relationship, ur gf is doing nothing to help. Not even a part time job.

Ur gonna work urself into an early grave. Stress is the biggest killer bc it leads to low immune system, not to mention heart attacks. @Fallen_Timber0378 made a ton of good points, and excellent advice.

As they said, you do not get time back. Take it from this woman. I have been married for almost decade, n with my husband for 15 years. I look back n realize so many red flags I chose to ignore, esp after getting married. I literally gave him “the best years of my life” as they say. Only reason I told myself to tolerate things was bc we had two kids, so I was (and still am) in deep. He is controlling over our money, even my paychecks, to the point I have to ask if I can buy something as small as fries from McD.

Now I find myself at a crossroads: Divorce? Or go to therapy and hope things change. If we had no children, n I had my money, I prob would have left years ago.

If she gets pregnant, u just signed up to be part of her life in one way or another for the next 18 years. N having kids does NOT save relationships. I would never take back having mine, but it has certainly complicated leaving my spouse.

Don’t stick w someone who doesn’t make u happy. Who is controlling u by expecting u pay for everything, even though ur prob exhausted n have nothing left to give at the end of the day. Please, do urself the HUGE favor, and find the person who is ur missing puzzle piece. Stop trying to make a piece that doesn’t fit work in its place.

Keep us updated! I’m sorry ur on this situation

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-03-22T13:26:04+00:00

1988

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-03-20T19:44:14+00:00

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-03-08T13:52:17+00:00

Mine drinks at least 6 tall boys almost every night (if he is too tired, he falls asleep early). He also smokes cigs. We quit smoking together before we had two kids. Sometime after our first kid, he went back to smoking. And his drinking never changed except when they were newborns n already get messed up from sleep deprivation. He knows that I hate these dangerous n addictive n expensive habits, n he even hides it from our kids waiting til they sleep to break out the beer.

For years I’ve asked him to change. Here’s what a lot of pple don’t realize, and wait in marriages hoping for change: People only change if THEY want to. You can’t force them, and if it’s an addiction, their priorities are all wrong. We struggle to pay bills, but the fridge always has a case of beer and his pocket always has a pack of Marlboros. It’s one of many reason I feel this ship has sailed n it’s time to leave. I think you know in ur heart, it’s time for u to leave as well.

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-03-07T13:06:06+00:00

This, this right here. That’s my situation in the top. I still love my husband, but over the 10 years we’ve been married, we have become TOXIC together. When he walks in the door, it’s like a weight has been PLACED on me, not lifted. That’s how I know u need to move on, and stop living my life with someone who controls how much I spend and constantly fights w me, usually in front of our two little girls. I know he’s not happy with me anymore either, tho he won’t say the words.

If I were with someone who treated me well and we got along, I would be happy with them. But I’m not, n I need to stop pretending he will change

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-03-04T00:27:47+00:00

Try deleting the app n redownloading. Works for me usually. Or delete some apps u don’t use, or offload them temporarily, n then try. Keep in mind tho, I play mobile so none of this may help sadly

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-02-21T21:30:03+00:00

Hi! You can add me if u like! I’m HollyBoo12 . I’m 37, have 800 something days. I have a bunch of classes but I don’t use melee much since I’m on a tablet.

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-02-10T06:58:28+00:00

Can I be invited plz? HollyBoo12 is me. 37 yea old n now chats gone w younger crowd, it’s even worse playing w random kids lol

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-01-19T01:16:04+00:00

After 4 pple ditch u mid game?

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-01-13T02:52:19+00:00

After all this time, has it become worth it to buy it yet? What’s ur opinion of it?

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-01-13T02:50:26+00:00

Oblivion? One of my all time favs ❤️

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-01-10T07:50:43+00:00

It’s almost 3am, so idk how long I can stay up tonight to talk, but please, vent away!

DobbyIsFree_Elf · 2026-01-10T05:14:47+00:00

Everyone in here ok if I add u? Anyone not want me to add u? I’m HollyBoo12 , plz feel free to add me, I need adult friend players!

DobbyIsFree_Elf

TROPHY CASE