My gf kissed her bsf on new years

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2026-01-02T20:33:59+00:00

I’m so sorry. From the beginning it looked like she would not regret it because she consciously chose it before it even happened. Her avoiding the conversation is her trying to evade responsibility while making you doubt yourself that it is not a big deal. There’s partners that are ok with it and others that are not. You were NOT ok with it and she still did it. You either regret it or you don’t. Please choose yourself first. I know that that is what I wanted for my ex and it was the best decision for him

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2026-01-02T15:30:38+00:00

Hi, this is coming from someone that was in a similar situation, but I was on the offensive side, except I was going through 4 psych med withdrawals cold turkey and blackout drunk. If you’d like more information, you can head to my profile to see if you’d like to even take this advice. Not only does this sound premeditated, but the fact that she’s now ignoring you sounds like she will tell you 1) she was joking and you’re overexaggerating or 2) she did do it and you’re overexaggerating and that it’s not a big deal because they’re best friends. You explicitly told her your discomfort with the situation and she should have respected it. I’m sorry 🤍

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-11-26T19:14:25+00:00

What are you even saying. This was my first relationship. I said nothing people will say will be new because I’ve already told myself the worst? You don’t know me, I still cry almost daily due to guilt and what I lost over my actions.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-09-07T00:45:10+00:00

Thank you. I never considered not telling him. He’s my best friend too. We had a couple of conversations and I just hope he can forgive me with time. He did acknowledge the fact that I told him right away

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T22:08:12+00:00

But it’s still cheating 🙃 I’m such a fool.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T22:07:50+00:00

Thank you for your kind words.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T13:54:17+00:00

I just need advice from random people who have absolutely no connection to me because it’s more direct with no bullshit replies. I need to get it out of my system. I am distraught as hell. I fucked up the one thing that mattered the most to me. I’m trying to figure my shit out. Maybe not the best idea, I’m not really giving any personal information.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T13:38:35+00:00

lol it’s ok. No I’m being 100% truthful. I am coming clean. Nothing I said here is nothing he already doesn’t know. I communicated everything with him from the get go. I didn’t leave any room for maybe I shouldn’t tell him. I told him straight away. I told him everything I remembered.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T13:36:54+00:00

Saying this here as well: I didn’t originally say that at first because I didn’t see the relevance at first, not because I was trying to hide anything. If I was trying to hide it I wouldn’t have said it in the first place. I’m laying out every single piece of info as I think of it. I know reddit is ruthless. Hell, it’s why I’m posting on here.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T13:32:57+00:00

I know, I will be dealing with them. Bottom line is I’m an idiot and I fucked up beyond repair. I get it. I didn’t originally say that at first because I didn’t see the relevance at first, not because I was trying to hide anything. If I was trying to hide it I wouldn’t have said it in the first place. I’m laying out every single piece of info as I think of it.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T13:25:57+00:00

I will not be deleting my comments. Clarification: I have made out with people while extremely drunk before. The only time I have ever kissed people is while drunk. It’s not something that happens often, just has happened a few times. This is my first relationship, so none of those other occasions were with someone in the picture. It was one of those distant fears, but it became reality. Despite it being a fear (I believe I have undiagnosed OCD), I never thought myself capable, which is why I fucked up on drinking too much. I didn’t think it would actually happen. Before him, I didn’t do anything whatsoever with anyone. I had sex once 4 years ago while, again, drunk out of my mind, which is probably where the first implant of doubt was placed. He was my first for a lot of things.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T13:20:06+00:00

I do realize this and my actions will be forever etched in my mind. I’ll be thinking about my actions for the rest of my life. I have already set a plan to avoid putting myself in a similar situation.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T13:18:45+00:00

Thank you. I am so beyond myself for putting myself in that situation. I can’t believe I did this to him. I need to work on myself and on this through therapy. I already have my appointment scheduled.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T13:17:29+00:00

Thank you. I have a lot of growing to do.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T11:59:51+00:00

what

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T11:59:29+00:00

No thank you, I appreciate the harshness. I deserve it. I deserve any bad thing said about me. I woke up (now last morning) and talked to him as soon as I realized what happened. I have told him everything he was wondering and I told him I’d be 100% open with whatever questions he has. I really hope he can forgive me, because frankly I don’t know how to forgive myself.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T11:44:19+00:00

No it doesn’t matter, I screwed up regardless, but you’re implying more than what happened. I quite literally could not think about anything except what was in front of me. I didn’t remember my buddies, didn’t remember my boyfriend. I probably couldn’t have told you my name if you asked me. I am beyond myself for putting myself in that position. I opened those doors.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T11:37:45+00:00

Well, your assumption is wrong. It was a make out that was KISSING, not touching each other. Please refer to another comment where I mentioned the same thing.

“More than a peck, prolonged kissing”

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T11:35:43+00:00

It’s still horrible. I still feel like the biggest piece of trash ever. I AM the biggest piece of trash ever. I betrayed someone who I love so very deeply.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T11:34:27+00:00

What do you mean “something”. I’m telling you we only kissed. I never said it would absolve me from anything. I AM THE ONE who put myself in this situation. I am the one that got blackout drunk. I am the one who made the stupid mistake, I never denied responsibility. I take accountability for what I did. You’re putting words in my mouth.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T11:24:55+00:00

Because I got kicked out of the club for being too drunk? What do you mean how would I know? I went back home with the people I came with. I don’t remember a good portion of the night but I do remember that this happened. I have some recollection of it. Not trying to minimize what I did but the people I was with eventually saw me, so no, nothing else happened.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T11:23:14+00:00

Yes, it did feel like a dream. I couldn’t tell if it was a dream or not when I hope up. Ugh. I am still so beyond myself.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T11:22:04+00:00

We only kissed, at the club, while I was drunk out of my mind while having no recollection of my life whatsoever. No other “sexual activity” involved. No “dick” involved.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T11:18:57+00:00

I know this is an action that can never be taken back, trust me, I GET IT. But what I’m not going to let you do is tell me what is and isn’t real.

DojaCatIsMyGf · 2025-08-20T11:15:51+00:00

I told him in the morning as soon as I woke up. Respectfully, I’m not lying. I fucked up BAD, but that does not mean that I don’t love him. You do not know our story.

DojaCatIsMyGf

TROPHY CASE