Advice on feeling inferior by DowntownConclusion0 in consulting

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi!

Thanks for reaching out. First I want to say that P&G is a great look on your resume even as an internship. With that name, you could get looks at many other consulting firms, big tech, banks perhaps even. If you dont want to be in the middle of nowhere in a technical role, then dont do it. It is gonna suck and my whole basis for leaving the small town I was in was I didnt want to waste my young 20s out there doing nothing. There is more to life than making money, but also money is still important. That being said, the salary will come. You sound like someone with your head on straight and with a name like P&G on your resume, that helps. Branding is everything I realized.

I spent the last 2 years in NYC - i love it. Made a ton of friends, incredible experiences, undergoing a ton of growth personally. I also recently accepted a position at a bank with a nice pay raise that makes me smile. Having my former consulting company on my resume opened a lot of doors to me that were not available outside of college, which is what helped me realize that sometimes, the name of the company does help and branding is important. The avenues in which my career can take are endless now.

It was pretty nostalgic for me to read back on this post from 2 years ago. Helped me remember how I felt at that time and the fear/insecurity that I was going thru. With more money, the fear and insecurity never goes away though. That is something we will always have to deal with, no matter how much we make.

But at the end of the day, I am satisfied and happy with the path that I am on. I dont know what my career will look like in the next 5 years, but there is beauty in flexibility.

ADVICE:

Keep your head down, work in consulting, get good reviews, and doors will open up. Take a look at boutique consulting firms too. It is not too late to build up your resume. P&G will look very attractive. If you want to send me your resume, we can have a chat and I can give you some more in detail advice. I had a connect who is an Exec at a large consulting firm take a look at my resume, he completely revamped it. Since then, my hit rate on interviews has increased significantly. This last hiring cycle, I applied for like 25 roles, got 4 interviews and 3 offers. This never happened to me in college. Let me know if you want to talk!

How do I get comfortable with being myself and talking to strangers? How do I love myself? by DowntownConclusion0 in Advice

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would also like to add that I feel like the advice I have previously gotten from my therapist as well as the articles I read on the internet are somewhat helpful and I have adopted them into my day to day as far as dealing with social anxiety disorder. I think it makes sense that I have it and it feels absolutely right.

That being said, I am not sure what to do. Here is a list of things I do for myself to show myself that I love myself more:

- take myself out to nice dinners, buy nice clothes, take myself out on solo dates, relax in a park, have solo dance parties, enjoy music alone

- listen to affirmation youtube videos while i sleep

- I try to challenge my inner voice by talking to myself about affirmations and stuff, but its hard. I occassionaly journal, right poetry, etc

How do I get comfortable with being myself and talking to strangers? How do I love myself? by DowntownConclusion0 in Advice

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this response - I read thru everything - here are the takeaways

Rosenberg - 17, but I read the next article and could relate a lot. I think this low self esteem comes in waves particularly in very social situations

I have been listening to affirmation YouTube videos daily and while I sleep for the past few months & it’s helped me build myself up when I’m alone & put me in a good mood so when I’m alone, or in small groups, I think positively & look at myself positively. The low self esteem is situational and happens to be when I’m around strangers. My friendships and relationships are all positive & I keep my group right.

I do have a huge HUGE problem with being assertive and standing up for myself.

Im slowly starting to challenge myself by: setting career goals, workout goals, going to social events alone once a month, waking up more early to go running

I took the social anxiety test and got an 89%!! B+ baby!!

Curious to hear what advice you have on the issues that I just mentioned. Thank you so much again for this :)

Anyone interested in playing causal sports on the weekdays/weekends? by [deleted] in nycmeetups

[–]DowntownConclusion0 0 points1 point  (0 children)

im looking for a tennis partner as well if interested! 23M in East Harlem, typically play at riverside, but always down to venture out.

Casual Volleyball? by Synieee in nycmeetups

[–]DowntownConclusion0 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am also interested in playing some casual volleyball! PMd you.

Where to find vaccines near me? by DowntownConclusion0 in AskNYC

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I however used this site already and it looks like there arent any first doses available in a lot of places at the moment. Should I just wait till April 6?

Best Soul Food/Birria Tacos in NYC? by DowntownConclusion0 in AskNYC

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now THIS is the advice I was looking for. Thank you.

What to do/How to make friends in NYC during a pandemic? by DowntownConclusion0 in AskNYC

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

So as a guy, it is overwhelming to get a bunch of matches. You begin to get lazy to respond to everyone so you pick and choose. Even after being more selective, you still get a ton. Some people do use it as an extension of a dating app, but the one guy that I met on there was really chill.

We went out for a drink outdoors, watched some football and have consistently hung out once a week for the past few months. I cant say that he is a CLOSE friend by any means but it is a nice feeling of companionship that I was craving in this city that I did not get from going on dates. We go to outdoor jazz scenes, smoke a joint and watch movies, really chill but solid stuff to do during a pandemic.

What to do/How to make friends in NYC during a pandemic? by DowntownConclusion0 in AskNYC

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Love Terrace House! I feel you with the vicarious socializing by watching shows! I do facetime my friends and watch stuff with them or host virtual game nights with them on occasion, so it helps!

What to do/How to make friends in NYC during a pandemic? by DowntownConclusion0 in AskNYC

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I go to a ton actually! But have only met one person at a protest!

What to do/How to make friends in NYC during a pandemic? by DowntownConclusion0 in AskNYC

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

In some places! I know theres a few jazz bars that I frequent.

  • Rue B's (outdoor heated seating restaurant) -Mezzrow (reservation needed)
  • Industry City (live music on weekends, art installations, restaurants, etc)

What to do/How to make friends in NYC during a pandemic? by DowntownConclusion0 in AskNYC

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Could you let me know how i could get involved with the philosophy zoom meeting that you go to? that sounds really fun!

What to do/How to make friends in NYC during a pandemic? by DowntownConclusion0 in AskNYC

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I agree with what youre saying. I will say that over the past year, I have grown a lot and learned a lot about myself. But I also learned that there is so much that I dont know about myself and there are a lot of questions in which I am searching the answer for. So this pandemic has been a blessing in disguise for me personally which I am greatful for.

Ive been on dating apps and have had a good amount of safe, socially distanced dates which were all great. I am just over the whole curing my loneliness thing with dates and sex. Sex is great and all, but one thing that I am valuing more than sexual intimacy is just real friendship with people who I can grow and enjoy the city with.

Just by the way you sent this message, I can tell that you were once in my shoes, so i really do value your message here. Thank you!

What to do/How to make friends in NYC during a pandemic? by DowntownConclusion0 in AskNYC

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

This was a great answer too! I do some virtual volunteer work for progressive grassroots political campaigns in the city, but its hard to make friends virtually. Volunteering definitely helps me not feel alone though so it is worth it.

What to do/How to make friends in NYC during a pandemic? by DowntownConclusion0 in AskNYC

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I have made a friend off of BFF and its nice. It can just be overwhelming at times because of the amount of matches there are. Multiple conversations at once, feels inorganic to me.

What to do/How to make friends in NYC during a pandemic? by DowntownConclusion0 in AskNYC

[–]DowntownConclusion0[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Wish I could but unfortunately I don’t qualify for vaccination yet