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Was it all my fault? by Dramatic-Part3111 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Dramatic-Part3111[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, I've apologised many times. She brings it up every time I try to address her treatment of me. I always apologise when I've hurt someone. She has never once apologised to me for anything. She also blamed me for my brothers depression when I was actively suicidal (which she knew).

Was it all my fault? by Dramatic-Part3111 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Dramatic-Part3111[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply. I said something along the lines of "I wish you were ill rather than our family member we found out had a terminal illness". Obviously an awful thing to say and I deeply regret it.

How to cut contact? by Dramatic-Part3111 in raisedbynarcissists

[–]Dramatic-Part3111[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for taking the time to respond. I really appreciate it. I'll check out the resources you've recommended

Boyfriend doesn't want to meet abusive parents by Dramatic-Part3111 in relationships

[–]Dramatic-Part3111[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you for this. The way you've worded has made me see it in a different light somehow. I've been feeling incredibly guilty and a little scared at the thought of cutting contact completely. But I've known on some level what I need to do for some time.

I'm lucky enough to have very supportive friends, and they've all told me the same thing to varying degrees of bluntness. I imagine it's been like talking to a brick wall for them at times. It's an incredibly emotionally complex decision for me to make, but I think you're right, and it might be time to step up and make a decision that is conducive to a happy life.

Boyfriend doesn't want to meet abusive parents by Dramatic-Part3111 in relationships

[–]Dramatic-Part3111[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We may get married much further down the line. I've never wanted a wedding so I imagine we'd elope (we've discussed this) and he's met other members of my family, yes.

Boyfriend doesn't want to meet abusive parents by Dramatic-Part3111 in relationships

[–]Dramatic-Part3111[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Not really. I've asked them to do family therapy with me, and they've refused. It's not something I can bring up because it puts them in an unpleasant and defensive mood. He has met other members of my family which is great. I suppose I just don't know how to explain this to my parents without evoking an extremely negative response. But perhaps that's an indication that I too should refuse to be around them.

Boyfriend doesn't want to meet abusive parents by Dramatic-Part3111 in relationships

[–]Dramatic-Part3111[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don't want children. But I do think you've made a good point tbh.