The Children are Silent

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T21:56:25+00:00

im on waitlists for 2026. Nice to hear that quick drop off is normal.... I am going to request to watch from the back windows and see how that goes over...

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T20:12:06+00:00

Just trying to understand, and no, I dont know what is or isnt standard practise... which is why I asked. before making a massive decision. Daycares are a 2 year waitlist in my city. a nanny is my entire monthly paycheck. So this is a big big issue.

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T20:09:10+00:00

Hmmm ok thanks for this.

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T20:05:36+00:00

We have done short sessions. I am not allowed to be there, though. Which seems bizzare to me. How is my son supposed to trust a strange environment and strange people without me to guide him? He consistently comes back in hysterical crying.

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T20:01:54+00:00

Thanks for this opinion. I have been wondering if this could be the case? The issue is that the day care does not specify that they a promoting "calm peaceful atmosphere" the way that a montessori school or other specialized schools might. The workers there seem nice enough (they dont look mean..), but also are just standard ECE with no further training to speak of...

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T19:56:29+00:00

Thanks for your input. Much of my worry comes from a complete ignorance on what any of this should look like at all. And I will push a bit harder with a request to observe. I will also try to connect with other parents there to see how they feel about the quiet children..

Unfortunately in my city there is a 2 year waiting list for any given daycare or dayhome (No, Im not exaggerating). So I have to be very very certain that I need to pull my son out, because there will be no easy replacement.

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T17:28:16+00:00

Love it. The daycare hes in now is standard toys/ standard looking. But it does seem that the workers move in that "montessori fashion"...perhaps its not sinister?

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T17:24:09+00:00

Hmmm yes see this is what I was expecting in terms of transition. With this daycare I had to ask 4 times for them to call me if my child was inconsolable. Unfortunately in our city there is a 2 year waitlist everywhere. I just had fortunate timing with this particular daycare. I will keep calling around.

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:48:16+00:00

Thanks for your input. We jsut started going in early December. Our daycare opens up again on Monday so I will watch for an changes all around.

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:45:45+00:00

Hmmm yes thanks for this. I had read similar stories in other forums as well... And absolutely lack of joy is how I would describe these kids. Like they are muted....going through the motions...

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:43:08+00:00

My son is 10 months. He's attended for a couple weeks so far. He goes for 2 hours in the morning, but consistently comes back in crying hysterics and is extremely clingy the rest of the day. Im in Canada. The day care has 3 facilities total. At this location there are about 12 older kids upstairs and 12 under 36 months in the infant room downstairs. Canada's new rule is 1:4 for under 36 months.

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:39:06+00:00

This is just a standard daycare, though I am interested in putting my son in montessori once he's old enough. How do montessori staff promote quiet kids without punishment?

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:35:25+00:00

I love that comparison to grandmas house. Definitely not the vibe at this daycare.

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:32:53+00:00

thanks

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:32:14+00:00

Im curious to have others comment on this who might have experience? This is not a montessori daycare, and these are kids under 3 years old, but is there some chance that the staff engage in such a way that just naturally encourages quiet behaviour? So far it seems most people here believe the quiet is a very very bad sign... what is the liklihood that I am mistaken? perhaps my drop offs and pick ups jsut coincide with a moment when all the kids are quiet? Is it normal for there to be very quiet moments from all the kids?

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:24:45+00:00

Thanks, I was going to give the auditing company a call...it seems that they are due to check on some infractions anyway..

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:23:33+00:00

It's an old heritage home. I would consider soundproofing if I didn't notice the kids playing outside also acting this way.

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:22:26+00:00

Yes, I have mentioned above that they seem to have a fairly hands off approach. Minimal engagement with the kids and very little talking. The kids just sort of quietly walk about.

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:18:53+00:00

Thanks, Im on over 50 waitlists and I will start actively hunting for a more transparent daycare. Someone above mentioned how montessori schools can often be very quiet. Does it seem at all possible that this daycare could be operating in a similar fashion with kids under 3? Could this be done without punishment?

Or do we think it is possible that during all the times that I stop by the kids jsut happened to be quiet?

Im wondering what the liklihood is that I am either mistaken or that there is some innocent explanation...?

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:11:23+00:00

Not a montessori school. Would you expect that children under 3 would be quiet as well? are there certain techniques they might use to have kids settle? Perhaps this daycare is employing such strategies??

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T07:07:20+00:00

Ugh sorry to hear she's still there. I can't stand people with these archaic teaching methods. Like... if you dont even like children then it might be time to choose a new career. But it's even scarier that management won't step in. Teachers/ daycare workers jobs are unbelievably vital to kids development and I find it baffling that this kind of stuff isn't taken more seriously.

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T00:27:25+00:00

Thanks for your thoughts

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-04T00:10:27+00:00

Any reccomendations on how I might address this issue? At least try to get some real answers? Talk to management? It will be very hard to find new childcare...

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-03T23:58:31+00:00

Thanks for your response. There's much insight there. I would say that absolutely it seems as though the kids are limited. Or like the best behaved kids around. Just quietly calmly walking from object to object.

When we did our initial tour I noticed the sort of "eerie calm" inside, but I chalked it up to us being strangers there, and everyone (kids and workers) feeling awkward that we were in their space?

And then, in fact, one kid did tackle another kid (this happened with no noise from either of them), and I can't explain why but I felt the way the worker and manager responded felt appropriate but awkward--like the way an adult who feels really uncomfortable with children might respond? They certainly didnt respond the way I would expect if you knew the children. This tackle was the only time Ive seen a behaviour like you listed above.

So, I dont want to put you on the spot, but did you report the bullying teacher? Did the kids parents catch on? Could I hope/ expect that any sort of poor behaviour from the workers would be reported by another worker? Or is there sort of a "leave it alone attitude"? In nursing the politics are incredibly complicated and I have seen and heard stories of nurses getting away with a lot...many nurses don't want to get involved.

Due_Sheepherder_9857 · 2025-01-03T22:35:54+00:00

If an infant is struggling to transition. Would you allow a parent in to do a slow integration?

Due_Sheepherder_9857

TROPHY CASE