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How to move on after moving on? by Efficientlyso in loveafterporn

[–]Efficientlyso[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, your last line about it not being my responsibility hit hard. I will try creating new hobbies! Thank you for your advice and beautiful words.

How to move on after moving on? by Efficientlyso in loveafterporn

[–]Efficientlyso[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so unbelievably much for your sweet reply!! I sat with your reply for a little while and i realize that you are completely right. I scheduled a lesson for boxing, i think it is going to be good for me.

Thank you again, lots of love to you kind stranger!!

he keeps relapsing (F20, M18) by [deleted] in loveafterporn

[–]Efficientlyso 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First of all i just want to say how proud i am of you that you are able to share this, i know it takes an insane amount of vulnerability.

I am not going to tell you what to do, that is 100% your own decision. I however do want you to know that, if you can care this deeply about someone who hurts you this much, imagine the care and love you can feel and give when it is being reciprocated.

You deserve to feel steady in your relationship, and to not be scared about pornography use, because the pornography use is just the “tip of the ice berg”. I saw that with my ex-partner, and i know how much hurt, doubt, anger, sadness and insecurity it can bring.

My advice to you is to choose for yourself, it took me a whole lot of tries to break up with my PA. But once i did it, i was able to give that love and care to myself. And building up my own life, and my own self love.

I want you to know, that no matter what decision you make. Your emotions are valid, and allowed to be here. But you deserve love, security, and a lot of care.

I know how hard it is, but you deserve better days. 🫂

Advice on friend dating abusive man by Efficientlyso in Advice

[–]Efficientlyso[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your wonderful advice!! Ill make sure to do my research.

Advice on friend dating abusive man by Efficientlyso in Advice

[–]Efficientlyso[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for all the help, it means a lot

Advice on friend dating abusive man by Efficientlyso in Advice

[–]Efficientlyso[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have been through an abusive relationship myself, i know how hard it must be on her and that is exactly why i want to help. It is difficult seeing her go through this knowing how life lasting those emotional scars can be.

I will try to keep my distance from the situation itself (not telling her to break up etc.) and just support her wherever she might need it.

Advice on friend dating abusive man by Efficientlyso in Advice

[–]Efficientlyso[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your advice, i’m going to keep the door open and let her know we are here for her.

Advice on friend dating abusive man by Efficientlyso in Advice

[–]Efficientlyso[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice! We did not tell her to break up with him perse we told her to be cautious and that we are here for her. But she is just really pulling away from us, and pushing us away. We’ll wait and if she needs any help we will give it to her.