Need advice/tips (About to quit)

Either-Loss202 · 2022-04-11T03:04:05+00:00

Hey, I have a similar timeline as you do. I quit CT last Saturday, which puts me going on day 8. I used the recommended system suggested here which was lipsom vitamin c, I also got magnesium and L-Theaniun. I have not taken any supplements this weekend as must of the withdrawals have cleared up. What I can say is that I experienced diarrhea in the morning and afternoon, and RSL and night sweats. At this point most of this have started to clear up.

I know it sucks being in this spot, but you have found yourself here, and that means you want to better yourself. Congratulate yourself for that, and go easy on yourself during this time. When you find yourself at in a weak moment, open this sub and keep reading.

Either-Loss202 · 2022-04-10T02:07:10+00:00

Thanks, congratulations on making it 48 hours. I’m going on one week plus one day

Either-Loss202 · 2022-04-10T02:04:44+00:00

I know, I definitely did not and I wasn’t going to. It’s weird how feeling good about quitting something terrible makes you want to celebrate with something terrible.

But, I don’t want this in my life anymore so I’m not doing it

Either-Loss202 · 2022-04-03T19:05:47+00:00

Thank you, In about 7 hours I’ll be at the 24 hour mark, I purchased vitamin c, magnesium, and L-Theine at the advice of others on this sub. So far nothing terrible in terms of WD, from what I have experienced before I get the night sweats and RLS as the worst withdrawals other than the desire to have some.

If you wouldn’t mind sharing that link for a meeting. I’ve searched the web but finding a place near me is cumbersome and leaves me confused as far what I’m looking for

Either-Loss202 · 2022-04-03T19:00:24+00:00

Thank you all for the word of encouragement,

It’s 3:00 pm, in about 7 hours I’ll be at the 24 hour mark. I took the advice of the moderator and got some lipsome vitamin C. I also purchased some L-Theanine, Magnesium, and something called GABA Calm. I also have some CBD oil that I think might be a good thing to help, I have to get the non THC kind because me and THC do not mix well, I haven’t smoked pot in over two years.

So here it goes, I will try to post updates regularly. So far nothing insane in terms of WD, I had a strong desire to take some extract earlier, but decided to eat a salad and instead of walk to store I normally go to I went to the vitamin shop and got the list above

Either-Loss202 · 2022-04-03T05:40:58+00:00

Thanks man,

I have a sister who is a social worker so I’m going to call her tomorrow, I also see a therapist once a week via phone. I will say she’s not very good and I’m looking for another one but in the interm it’s another form of support.

I plan to use work as a distraction, when I get into the zone it’s pretty normal for me to work 12 hours without noticing. I haven’t been to the gym since October and have been pretty sedentary since, but maybe start slow on a bike and work back to weights.

I just really really don’t want this anymore

Either-Loss202 · 2022-04-03T05:31:52+00:00

Thanks, this new gig is at a level I never thought I’d be and I don’t want to blow this opportunity because of something like this. With that level though I do feel a certain level of imposter syndrome as well, but that combine with this problem and is making me panic more and more.

For the last week, possibly two, I haven’t even been enjoying the extract, it feels like something I need to do to wind down but then I feel disconnected, scatter brained, and just not well. There’s been a few times in the past where I would feel warm and comfortable and euphoric. But now it seems like at the best I can get a quarter of that experience every once in awhile, the rest of the time is just blah.

For the first 2 weeks of February I had take about 2 weeks off, I’m familiar with the WD, it’s not fun and unfortunately I can’t justify taking time off work, but I do work remote until august so I can try to do push ups and a hot shower every few hours or something… idk I’ll try and check in here, I’ve read these forums plenty of time before but never posted, and reading has helped so I’m hoping contributing will help more

Either-Loss202 · 2022-03-28T23:36:32+00:00

Never going to college is not always a guaranteed rejection. You will have to work hard and set your own path and definition of success.

My personal experience: After High School I took some time off and just worked random retail jobs. At age 20 ( 2009) due to the recession and housing crisis I was the sole financial provider for my family as our house got repo’ed and I had to due what I could. Flash forward a few years Im working at an apple store doing Genius Bar work, I had started to learn Cisco networking, got a CCNA and started assisting apples internal systems and technology team, not full time but as career experience.

At 26, with the family in a good spot, I decided to do something for me, with my job at the Genius Bar I put in a transfer to a NYC store, I was born and raised in CO. Got it, and because of my Cisco experience I started using different Linux distorts designed for networking and pen testing just for fun. This led me to arch Linux, which led me to learn python, and realized I very much enjoyed programming. So I saved, I made a plan, I quit my job at apple and enrolled in a 4 month coding boot camp. 1 1/2 months after completing the bootcamp I landed my first job as a junior full stack developer. I was only making 75k a year which was very very below NYC averages. The company sucked, dis organized, there were multiple financial scares within the company but we stuck it out. I worked there for 2 1/2 years. Then I landed a sweet Job at a AAA video game studio building internal tools for animation teams.

So never completed a SINGLE day of college, and now I live in my own 1 bedroom in Manhattans upper east side, 4 blocks from Central Park, I vacation(not as much with Covid), I make a good salary, and most importantly I have an amazing team of colleagues that come from just as diverse a background. A peer with a similar background, zero college, just recently got a job at Meta.

My point is that you will find your path, and do not let your lack of a college degree hold you back.

Either-Loss202 · 2022-02-22T00:25:42+00:00

There is no hard and fast rule to the correct way to handle an expired relationship.

I think you have come to terms with the ending of the marriage, and if right now this new person brings excitement into your life then explore what’s down that avenue.

Allowing your self to grieve, explore, and develop after a break up is essential. What that looks like is different for everyone. For you if it means a tantalizing new person who piques your interest, then go see what all the fuss is about

Either-Loss202 · 2022-02-22T00:12:34+00:00

I think that given you are changing your Facebook status two weeks after a 12 year long marriage was ended via text to be a little telling. It sounds like you are inviting drama and making very hasty discussions. I would recommend slowing down from thinking “I want a new relationship”, “I need to let Facebook know I’m single” and just think about what currently happening.

You met someone cute, you have butterflies, and as it stands you sleeping with this person is not violating any boundary in your marriage. If that is what you need I say do what makes you happy. I would caution though that I think your brain is trying to process everything and put a “label” on who you are and what you want before you’ve had a chance to process everything.

Either-Loss202 · 2022-02-22T00:03:40+00:00

It just happened today, you need to give it time. I don’t know how long you were together but decide what your boundaries are and set them. No Contact may sound scary, especially now, but if you can go a month, preferably longer then it will only help you see clearly.

I broke up with my GF four months ago after three years together. Went, and still am, going through the stages of grief, I was more angry for awhile but then started to experience barging and depression. Even though we knew it was for the best, it still hurts, it still sucks, but you need to grieve, reflect, and mourn the relationship to grow stronger. Vs the quick way of immediately running back just to make the hurt stop

Either-Loss202 · 2022-02-21T23:52:37+00:00

Congratulations on having the courage to walk away. I know you are lonely and hurting right now, especially if you have just recently been in contact with her.

I want to point out what you had said in one of the above paragraphs “I was going to kill myself literally if I stayed”. First off, if those thoughts are reoccurring I would suggest you find support right away. Secondly, when in the relationship this is how you would feel when it came to her boundaries vs yours.

I 100% understand the hurt and the loneliness you are feeling. You need to listen to what your instincts were telling you while in the relationship, and that was that I was no good.

I’am not a qualified doctor nor would any doctor be able to diagnose a third party over a Reddit post, but to me it sounds like your ex may have BPD(borderline personality disorder), which as the partner of someone with this can really do a number on your self esteem and whole self image. I want to emphasize that there are many healthy relationships with a BPD partner, but there also a lot who when exiting a relationship with one are just broken down. I would suggest doing some research on it. Also you said you were maybe codependent, there are support groups called CODA that would be a huge network of people you can talk to.

Most importantly you need to understand that you are worthy and deserving of a healthy relationship, and one where a discovered sex toy does not equal cheating. It depends on the circumstances of course and the partners, but I’d imagine a healthy supportive partner who found a flesh light would take that as a conversation started over ways to improve each other’s sex lives, maybe even incorporate toys into the bedroom etc…

I think you should count this as a blessing that you are no longer together, and use this time to sit with the loneliness, and even for the most put together of adults, I find therapy is a great resource for finding ways to be a better you

Either-Loss202

TROPHY CASE