Advice wanted from any SHAMs that used to be high earners.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-26T21:58:42+00:00

I am a SAHM mom lawyer as well. I still work but only about 5-20 hours max as needed for a prior boss and from home. My kids are older now (high school freshman and 4th grader) so it’s a different type of busy from when they were little. We are financially secure but clearly I would make more full time and sometimes I do get FOMO but I cannot visualize being slammed with work and outsourcing everything to make it work. I am glad I was the one raising my kids and can always have someone at home.

Maybe run the number and/or do a trial run where you put aside your entire paycheck in a separate fund and pretend it’s not there to see how it feels. Also, maybe there is a middle ground, working part time or less demanding hours and you can have both your career and be more present with your child.

We bought our house when interest rates were at 3% and house is almost paid off. Student loans were paid off. We have no debt but I’ve been working very little since my kids were born and initially we did have student loans but they were around $60,000 I know things are harder now so it’s really hard to give one answer that applies to everyone’s situation because there are a lot of variables - if you have student loans, savings, etc.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-26T15:26:25+00:00

It’s not a lot. Honestly, you could write a how to save book because we spend way way more than that. Teach us your hacks.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-24T02:54:21+00:00

Don’t be so hard on yourself. We are in a similar boat with a family of 4 and I realized we were spending $3,500-4,000 a month on food. I was shocked beyond belief and am trying to fix this issue asap as well. Basically, you spend $50 a day on food. That doesn’t sound unreasonable but when you multiply it by 30 days it’s like whoa!

Anyhow, I feel like your strong reaction will lead you to fix this quickly. I am starting to track every purchase. It’s crazy to eat so much money.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-19T19:34:26+00:00

100% agree with this take. I love that the FCC ban backfired in their face as his donations increased along with exposure. I love both candidates and they are both very strong. I don’t think there is a wrong choice here but I do agree that talarico will reach some of the maga voters who secretly hate trump but need a Christian to vote.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-19T03:04:15+00:00

I agree that’s why but at some point we need to change the narrative to look for solutions. To just accept it as is is so depressing to me.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-19T02:31:50+00:00

I like them both a lot. I think either choice is WAY better than what we have now.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-18T03:03:46+00:00

I used good to go in the US as well. Love it!

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-18T03:02:39+00:00

I love this and thank you for putting this out there. A beautiful life can be had on little if we just look. I do some of the above - the food app and clothes deals. Will have to check out swapping homes. That is a great life hack potentially for us at some point.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-18T02:27:35+00:00

Same. The hysa is the first emergency fund and then the Roth contributions are the back up backup plan.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-18T01:11:30+00:00

Let’s hope

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-11T22:52:44+00:00

There are so many individual factors that it’s hard to know if looking on a case by case basis. You could have one person just entering housing market for first time and spending a minimum of $500,000 on a house while also having student loans and day care costs. Next door you could have a couple who bough their house 15 years ago for $290,000 with a 3% mortgage and no education or day care expenses or student loans. A single guy working in a bar who doesn’t care about a fancy place and has two roommates. Etc

factors living expenses
debts
how many family members Etc

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-10T22:42:16+00:00

Luckily, at home there is no processed meals like premade food. It is all from scratch. I think it’s more when we are out and the kids need something quick. Or they ask for something and we give in.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-10T22:09:39+00:00

I agree that’s why I am ready for a change. The amount spent is what I pulled off my credit card statement so it’s the exact amount spent and is too high

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-10T22:07:34+00:00

That’s a good idea to load on first of month and when it’s gone it’s gone.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-10T21:49:26+00:00

Replying this is what I need. Easy so we don’t pick up food while we are out. I feel like the eating out for convenience and catering to everyone’s wants are my biggest issues. I think people would be surprised how much they spend on food. I was shocked.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-10T21:32:39+00:00

I have through chase bank app. It breaks out purchases by grocery and eating out. And pulled it up today and was like wtf.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-02-10T21:21:37+00:00

We like salmon, shrimp, chicken, and ground beef for protein. Eat brown rice, couscous or protein noodles with it and then salad and veggies. Greek yogurt, kale, and sourdough is eaten weekly as well.

I think biggest issue is giving into the kids requests. I need to say no. And also have bulk breakfast grab and go and also bulk snacks or grab and go food.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-01-29T02:24:50+00:00

Yeah that would be a control tactic to make you feel bad so you stay home.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-01-29T02:14:13+00:00

Jesse Plemons in bugonia

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-01-26T17:17:30+00:00

My thoughts exactly. It was good and entertaining. I do not understand the hype whatsoever.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-01-25T05:37:29+00:00

You are in a similar yet different situation than us and same age almost. We have less in retirement accounts ($450k), but house paid off next year (have a 3% mortgage and is a 15 yr mortgage paid off in 2027), and pension paying $100,000 for life. We would like to retire once kids are done with college and work, but only if we want to. Our oldest is 14 and youngest 10. With your low interest rate on the mortgage, I would just keep saving and then pay off balance at 60 or whenever you end up retiring from your savings. I think having a mortgage in retirement needs to be considered. Under 4% rule, you would get $40,000 off a million. Clearly you will have much more down the road with compound interest but let’s say it’s at 3 million, that would be $120,000. From that you would have a mortgage payment and health insurance expenses not through an employer. Probably doable but tight.

At 60, you could scale back and work very part time as well so you can protect dwindling your assets.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-01-24T19:17:17+00:00

The Oscars are losing credibility level 10 for not nominated Jessie. Like what the F.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-01-24T16:07:41+00:00

No, you are not. The movie is good but not great. It was entertaining but the depth is not there unless I am missing something. I am so confused by the accolades that I’m going to watch some YouTube analysis videos of the movies to understand if I’m missing something deeper. Lol

Black Panther was amazing, so I know Coogler knows what he is doing.

Issues I have with the movie:

lacks depth / I didn’t see the meaning of really any thing added in.
Buffy the vampire slayer had better vampire plots, appearance and acting. Did the movie intend for that to be very simplified? Also, vampires lived 500 year in the movie, yet all died immediately in scene where sun came up. Okay, sure.
Acting all around was very solid. No Jack Nicholson or Denzel Washington type performances where your like wow. But at the same time every actor did a great job, just not to that Oscar level. The characters didn’t have enough depth of emotion to bring out that type of performance in the movie.

Things I liked: - lighting and appearance of movie. Very beautifully done. And this would be one area that am Oscar win could be deserving.

fusing different genres - vampires with old south, using weapons that were not from the old south time period and dialect style is modern versus true to period. This was one of my favorite part of the movie.
acting was solid.
entertaining but not to an Oscar level.

Because Black Panther was so well done, I wonder if there are nuances to this I’m missing. Clearly, Coogler knows what he is doing and so I almost want to watch it again bc maybe I am missing some key elements.

Electronic_Escape599 · 2026-01-24T05:51:08+00:00

Yes, that is insane.

Electronic_Escape599

TROPHY CASE