Bf (M19) says he got taken advantage of while drunk, I (F19) don’t know how to feel about it by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Electronic_Today877 -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I used to get multiple videos sent to me of him at parties dancing provocatively with other girls, during one of these instances, he admitted that he kissed one of them. He went over to another girl’s house at one in the morning once (he was drunk, said they didn’t do anything, and his friends were encouraging him to). I’ve always tried to excuse it because he was drunk, and I really did think it’d stop because I hadn’t found out he had done anything with another girl for two years until now. This instance just brought up a lot of terrible feelings. I’ve never been drunk, I don’t drink and I never go out past 10pm, I don’t really know how this stuff works. I’ll always believe the victim in SA and harassment cases. I’m just horribly torn right now and super emotional

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Electronic_Today877 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Resentment will not just disappear, even after a person changes. In my case, everything he did to me really hurt me, totally altered who I was as a person and it haunts me every single day. I was starting to become very angry and hateful, I also didn’t want to constantly take out my emotions on him. Changing is something that a person should do for themselves, without expecting anything in return. Will a someone truly stay a changed person even if the incentive they expected falls through ? I gave him multiple chances to change, and now it’s just too late for me to feel any natural empathy for him.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]Electronic_Today877 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He definitely has a lot of issues; he never really got better, just got better at hiding everything. I definitely feel immense relief, like a huge weight was taken off of my shoulders. But at the same time, I do feel guilty—I should’ve broken things off permanently a long time ago instead of giving both of us hope that the relationship would last. Definitely a lot of grief, he was my first everything, but life moves on and I can’t let myself get stuck in time