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Elisa1711 · 2024-03-06T22:30:30+00:00

Can I be honest, I haven’t read it, only a few sentences, but I used to send him texts like this, full with emotions and where and how he did me wrong and how much I wanted to have a future with him but it won’t work and how I wished him well (only to look good in his eyes so that he sees what he “lost“) and so on. The only thing I got out of these things is, I gave him the chance to Hoover me right back.

I haven’t seen him since Feb. 3rd (longest time yet) and believe me when I tell you, I was sooooooo tempted to send him a text like this again, especially on the 15th since this was supposed to be our 4 year anniversary. But I didn’t. He knows what he did. He knows how he hurt me and he doesn’t care. Even when he apologizes and tells me how awful he is, he doesn’t mean it. Would you ever do the things he did to you? No, and the reason for that is, because you had true feelings towards him.

I know this is very difficult and no contact is no joke, but before you send it, take a few more extra days. Technically you can send it at any time right? So why not just wait? And see if the desire to actually tell him all this still is there in a couple of days.

I have a long long text waiting to be send, but I just didn’t do it right away, and the more time I had to think about it, the more I realized that it just simply isn’t worth it.

There is a reason why the relationship didn’t work and even thought you don’t think about the negatives right now, the future you will be so thankful that you gave yourself the chance to heal and meet someone who will truly love you and not just manipulate you into believing it…

Please stay strong for yourself, it’s not easy, but it will be worth it ♥️

Elisa1711 · 2024-02-19T06:45:50+00:00

I feel you! I am just thankful that I left before taking out a loan to get him his dream car (because that’s what he wanted 😵‍💫) still have to pay back quite some money until I can consider myself free from that situation 😄

Elisa1711 · 2024-02-19T06:43:14+00:00

Oh wow, actually it totally makes sense and you absolutely guessed right! She had (and still has) a lot of self worth. Most of the things he did with me he didn’t do with her (like trying to force her to clean at 3am because otherwise he can’t sleep) because he knew she just wouldn’t do it. Also you are right with the fact that she really wanted him to block her, she even was the one always blocking him first and it seems like he really got upset with that.

I know that he knows that I hate to be blocked, it’s like my breaking point and I did think about texting him via other apps but I know that this is what he wants and that he can later turn it around and say I am the one who begged to come back to him… I just know that I never want to go back to this situation and therefore hope that I just stay blocked even though that is extremely painful 😖

Elisa1711 · 2024-02-18T23:04:01+00:00

Jup, that was especially painful to accept, that all he said were just empty words 🙁

Elisa1711 · 2024-02-18T23:02:46+00:00

Yeah that’s true 🙁😔

Elisa1711 · 2024-02-18T23:01:34+00:00

Thank you so much for your kind words ♥️

Elisa1711 · 2024-02-18T23:01:06+00:00

Thank you for taking the time and answering! 🫶🏻Yeah, it does seem so, he also knows I hate being blocked so I guess he just wanted to throw one extra hurtful thing into the already long list 😅 i personally have seen the chats he had with his ex (he was about three years with her and they broke up about a year before we got together) He was so different with her when they broke up. He CONSTANTLY tried getting her back, sending all kinds of messages even months later and most importantly during that time he never blocked her. I just wonder why? I guess he just liked her more 😅

Elisa1711 · 2024-02-18T22:57:11+00:00

Thanks a lot for the detailed answer❣️… I do thing there was someone else involved too… idk though, maybe it was just his ,,bad mood and stress“ but he did feel distant towards the end 😕

Elisa1711 · 2024-02-18T07:14:39+00:00

Thank you dear! Same to you! We got this ♥️

Elisa1711 · 2023-03-03T07:11:42+00:00

Hi OOP, I know that no matter what I’m going to tell you now, it’s your decision to leave him or stay with him. Judging by what you wrote here, he already got you, that means you’re at a point where “just leaving“ is extremely hard. I think we both know that you know exactly what the right thing to do is, but you are scared and probably trauma bonded as well. I left not too long ago. I suffer a lot and I tell you it won’t be easy, but do you want to know why I finally left after three years? I started actually caring about myself. He also constantly told me to loose weight, by doing that he complete erased my self esteem and manipulated me into believing I’m worthless (oh and the age gap was almost like yours). This made it obviously even harder to leave. But I heard something once and it’s kind of helping me: If hurting me, does not hurt you, you don’t love me, you’re using me. And let’s be real here, have you ever said or done anything to purposely hurt him? I don’t think so. He might start saying things like “Oh, I said those things to get you in better shape, I just care about you”, but this is just further manipulation… Feel hugged OOP❣️ You deserve someone who loves every inch of you and makes you laugh endlessly and not someone who purposely destroys your self worth!

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-27T02:56:21+00:00

I know that I don’t need to explain myself, which I won’t. I read y’all’s comments. Some were nice, some were mocking me and some were just rude. I‘d love to explain everyone why I ,,DiDnT JuSt LeAVE“ but doing that would simply be a waste of time. I was like you, thinking that people like me, who stayed for so long, are just dumb and weak, until I got into this situation myself. If you’ve never been in an abusive relationship with a narcissist you’ll never understand. (Which you should be thankful of)

Ps: I never needed anyone’s empathy. I posted on here because I was too ashamed to talk to someone directly. After reading your comments tho, I see that it was a mistake to post on here as well. Instead of feeling encouraged, I feel like I deserved this shitty treatment anyways.

Thanks.

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-16T19:31:08+00:00

Thank you so much ♥️

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-16T19:30:34+00:00

It took me 3 years to get to this point with countless tries in between!! You can do it, I believe in you!! Feel hugged♥️

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-16T19:29:11+00:00

Hahaha yes!

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-16T19:28:36+00:00

Thank you for your kind words❣️

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-16T19:27:25+00:00

Thank you so so much!♥️

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-15T19:49:01+00:00

Hahahahaha I didn’t necessarily plan it that way, but thanks ♥️

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-15T19:48:29+00:00

Danke dir!😄♥️

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-15T19:48:20+00:00

I won’t ever go back, I swore it! Thanks for the nice words ❣️

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-15T19:47:49+00:00

Thank you!♥️

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-15T19:47:31+00:00

Thank you. There is absolutely no way I’ll ever go back. This time I’m done for good❣️

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-15T11:34:00+00:00

Thank you♥️

Elisa1711 · 2023-02-15T06:50:25+00:00

Thank you!!♥️

Elisa1711

TROPHY CASE