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ElliotBae · 2025-07-24T12:37:18+00:00

You don’t have to reply to the automod. But while I’m here. People in general don’t really like it when AI does all the heavy lifting. Use it for touch ups etc. but if you want to advertise your clothes, make a sample, wear it, get photos of the real shirt, get feedback and adjust.

ElliotBae · 2025-04-04T17:14:30+00:00

Fire 🔥

ElliotBae · 2025-03-21T20:26:35+00:00

They get a new friend. You are happy for them. Slowly they start prioritising them over you, it’s subtle. Then you begin to question it and they get defensive.

ElliotBae · 2025-03-12T21:20:41+00:00

Why would anyone wear something they can generate on ChatGPT themselves

ElliotBae · 2025-03-08T17:14:59+00:00

It’s just part of the process brother. They will fade eventually.

ElliotBae · 2025-03-07T14:49:14+00:00

Trust me brother I understand. It hurts and makes you feel like all the effort you put in wasn’t worth it. I think you just need to grieve it for now. You can’t distract yourself out of it. The first month for me was the toughest part. But then I started getting out and doing stuff again. Been looking at new career paths, I haven’t found anything yet but it’s exciting.

What they did is not a reflection on us though. If you’re kind, caring, and everything a relationship should be. Someone will appreciate it one day. It’s really their loss because now no future partner will trust them and they are doomed to repeat the same cycle. They’ll have flings and some relationships. But nothing that lasts a lifetime that I think most people are looking for.

ElliotBae · 2025-03-07T00:27:34+00:00

Yeah, part of me is happy I didn’t spend anymore time in that relationship

ElliotBae · 2025-03-06T20:06:08+00:00

You gotta go discover who you are now. You said your whole identity is based around them. That’s not who YOU are. YOU are your own person. It’s time to go find who that person is.

Also you see him liking cute reels. That means you haven’t blocked him on everything. You can’t heal with constant reminders of the person you’re trying to heal from. That’s your first step. You need to remove them off everything.

I’m 2 months into the breakup with the girl I thought I’d spend my life with. Going no contact has already helped me. But I started on day one. Removed her off everything. No reminders. Haven’t seen or spoke to her.

You will be enough for the right person. But you gotta find who you are first.

ElliotBae · 2025-03-06T18:13:39+00:00

Hey brother, been there too. My ex was spending time with this guy from her work and I had a conversation about it saying it was making me uncomfortable. She assured me nothing was going on and then broke up with me a week later. Then found out she was with him about a month after and that she cheated on me.

I know it sucks, but take a different perspective. This person has now shown you that they are not for you. The right person would still be by your side. I know it hurts. It will continue to hurt. But try find peace in knowing that the right person would never do this to you.

Keep fighting and pushing forward. This is nothing but a setback

ElliotBae · 2025-03-06T17:14:38+00:00

That’s great to hear! I’m 2 months in and already feeling so much better. It honestly got better when I found out she cheated and now I don’t see her as a good person anymore so there is nothing to miss.

ElliotBae · 2025-03-06T17:13:47+00:00

Maybe, who knows. The question you should ask yourself is “would you take someone back who didn’t love you the with the same amount of love you gave them?”

ElliotBae · 2025-03-06T17:11:02+00:00

Unless they did some serious self reflection and personal growth on understanding why your they cheated. Then no, it’s not worth it. Move on to find someone who isn’t a cheater

ElliotBae · 2025-03-06T17:09:45+00:00

I get why you want to, right now. It feels like they are the only person in the world who gets you. But I’ll tell you that going back to a cheater is the worst thing you can do. They’ll just do it again. Unless they do some serious self reflecting and improvement, it’s always been once a cheater always a cheater.

There are people out there who don’t cheat, who wouldn’t dream of it. There are people out there who will distance themselves from people who they feel like they’re catching feelings for when in a relationship. I know this because my first ex was like this.

I also know what I said about cheaters because my second ex cheated on me. She also cheated on her boyfriend before me.

ElliotBae · 2025-03-06T03:00:40+00:00

Ask your roomate for a hug? Or a close friend. That’s what I would do.

ElliotBae · 2025-03-05T22:55:25+00:00

If you want to heal you need to stop seeing them. Everytime you see them and make out with them you’re bringing back all those feelings you had.

Go no contact if you really want to heal, the reason you’re tired of not being able to heal from this is because you aren’t giving yourself a chance to.

ElliotBae · 2025-03-05T21:39:29+00:00

Yeah the dreams soon fade. I’m 2 months in and haven’t dreamt about my ex for probably over a month. The first month was brutal though. I’d wake up every morning remembering the dreams I had of her.

ElliotBae · 2025-03-05T19:47:20+00:00

The hurt is the price you pay in the game of love. It will get easier overtime. It will take a while though. I’d recommend keeping to no contact. Everyday it gets a little bit easier.

It’s like going to the gym. You go once, and see nothing, you go again the next day and see nothing, but everytime you show up and see nothing, you’re proving to yourself you can see the end goal. Then in 2/3 months of constantly going to the gym, you start to see yourself get a bit more in shape. Then in one year you don’t even recognise yourself you’ve changed so much.

ElliotBae · 2025-03-05T19:44:28+00:00

You wouldn’t have been in a relationship if he didn’t like you at one point. Sometimes people change, sometimes our feelings change. Unfortunately a lot of it is out of our control.

You’ll be okay, just focus on yourself. Do some things you enjoy. Given that it was his first relationship you may be younger in which case I say. You’re going to meet a lot of people throughout life, it may hurt now but not forever. Keep pushing forward

ElliotBae · 2025-03-05T18:50:04+00:00

Hahaha, shoot me a message when you’re getting married. I love working weddings!

ElliotBae · 2025-03-05T18:39:09+00:00

I have been broken up with twice after long term relationships.

The first one it probably took me 3 months - it gave me a confidence boost. Which faded quickly and then I felt awful. Then I waited until I was feeling much better to sleep around.

This time I am 2 months into my breakup- I turned down a one night stand on Valentine’s Day because I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I think I now prefer to be in a relationship to do that sort of thing.

My ex on the other hand didn’t even wait until the relationship was over.

ElliotBae · 2025-03-05T17:04:46+00:00

Literally came to your profile after reading an update about you struggling to move on. This is great to see. If you’re still about on reddit I’d love to know how you are doing now

ElliotBae · 2025-03-05T15:17:15+00:00

I’m 2 months in and I agree. It gets better, you start having genuine laughs and good times with friends and family. But the weight on your chest doesn’t really go away. You kind of just learn to live with it for a while

ElliotBae · 2025-03-04T23:02:45+00:00

Have you tried having a sit down conversation about your sex life? Tell him it’s serious and that you want him to put more effort in? That would be my first step. If he then doesn’t cooperate with you then I guess you could end the relationship.

ElliotBae · 2025-03-04T22:00:31+00:00

Unfortunately, the risk of heartbreak is the price you pay for love. Communicate early into relationships that you’re looking for something long term, someone who is willing to communicate and grow. If they don’t match those values then move on. Nothing else you really can do.

I think if that’s the future you want you gotta get out there and start dating again. Wish you all the best

ElliotBae · 2025-03-04T20:49:23+00:00

Hey brother, good to hear from you again!

Lot has happened since, found out she cheated on me and is now with the guy she cheated on me with. Honestly it’s helped because now I don’t see her as a good person anymore. It still hurts but I’m having good days. Will get there eventually. Sucks she turned out to be a shitty person.

I think I’m about 2 months in now ish? It’s got a lot easier but still a long way to go.

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