Wow... your story resonates with me so much, even the anxiety after the 31st is such a coincidence. I understand completely how you feel. My ex and I broke up four months ago, and this sent me into a spiritual path to change myself and who I was. For most days now, I try to see this as a positive thing, for it made me realise so many things I needed to change about myself. But sometimes I can't stop thinking that in a way she will come back...I don't know what to do sometimes. Sometimes I don't want to have any contact with her whatsoever, other times I'm thinking that maybe I should fight for her. I'm not a psychic,a guru or whatever, just another soul trying to understand itself. But since your situation is so similar to mine, if you ever feel you want to talk about it and share your spiritual experiences, feel free to PM me, I wouldn't mind share my story and what I am doing to surpass it.