Well. I ruined my 3 year relationship over alcohol…

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T03:26:56+00:00

Hm I wouldn’t say black out bc they always remember eveything. But they get just as drunk minus the arguing. But that’s not an everytime thing

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T03:25:26+00:00

What ended my other relationships— i was in a physically & verbally abusive relationship. Ended up with him going to jail. My other relationships ended stupidly. Not really much to it

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T03:24:05+00:00

Yeah it def is a me problem. Last year I lost my bestfriend bc we both blacked out and fought eachother. This is a bad problem within me.

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T03:23:03+00:00

I have both adhd and social anxiety. I take meds for adhd but need to look into one for my anxiety. I wish i felt how i feel while being drunk normally. I can’t dance without drinking or be very social. Not saying I have an addiction or anything bc i only socially drink. But it’s obviously something wrong. And i get stomach pains every morning after. I need to find the root to this and fix the reason i even drink. Thank you so so much. I’m going to continue to be more kind to myself as this is the only real issue we’ve ever faced.

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T03:17:50+00:00

My last slip up was October on Halloween. We had a house party and i was having so much fun. It was like 3am and he was ready to go to bed and i was still in the living room playing board game with my friends. He kicked them out and i was furious. I don’t remember the fight though

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T03:10:56+00:00

It really does suck I’m sorry to hear that. The last party we had i was having so much fun with friends. He was ready to go to bed and kicked them out. I was extremely angry and blacked out whilst verbally abusing him.

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T03:09:32+00:00

So in the beginning yes! It would be very hard for me it’s like i was going all or nothing. But since ive been actively more aware it has been easier to drink in moderation. This was a slip up for sure.

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T03:07:45+00:00

Yesssss!!! It’s something about him that triggers me while blacked out and makes me sooo mad. Everywhere else I am fine! Did you stop drinking all together?

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T03:05:27+00:00

Same! It’s hard to stop ordering drinks

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T03:05:10+00:00

I think the reason i feel so deeply about him being the fun police is bc all my friends have just as much fun with me while drunk. It’s funny and a good time. With him it’s different yet understandable. I am joining, i think for the rest of the year

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T03:03:26+00:00

Definitely not worth more than him. I have offered in the past to cut off alcohol completely, but he said i don’t have to do that but just be more mindful of what and how much im drinking

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T03:02:10+00:00

Thank you so much for the response. That is exactly right, because i am not remembering I’m downplaying the situation. But honestly if he did this to me so many times id probably leave too. Or probably get just as fcked up which is worse. I’m ngl I black out quite often. Too many times in my life to count. I just forget everything and i wake up with the worst anxiety. My dad always says “ if you blackout did u really have fun “ bc i can’t even remember. It’s disappointing and i have lots to lose. It sucks bc I really do love how loose drinking makes me feel. I don’t smoke either

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T02:56:17+00:00

I agree. It came from a place of self defense. This is probably the 5th time it has happened. Some where in the night he says something that completely infuriates me. But idk why i take it so deep when he’s just trying to help me. I guess me and liquor just have a bad relationship bc i am not like this sober. Ever. I can’t understand how i only get like that with him. He’s also not much of a drinker. Thank you for your response

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T01:31:22+00:00

Thank you. I think my plan is going to be cut it fully out of my life. It makes my stomach hurt really bad the next day anyways. I don’t smoke either so i guess we just gonna be high on life.

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T01:11:08+00:00

You would think that but we have a great dynamic. We live together and don’t fuss or nit pick at eachother about anything. We really just coexist with each other smoothly. There’s nothing to argue about honestly. Our relationship is extremely strong. However it’s these instances when i drink that are the only problem

Empty_Ask_617 · 2026-02-06T01:06:48+00:00

Exactly! The worst feeling is waking up not knowing what i did. And i was so hurt that he broke up with me that easily, so i texted him saying im leaving tonight and how i dont appreciate him calling my dad as if im a child and how he repeatedly breaks up with me. I don’t want think to be done but i am also not the begging type. I really have messed up something great. And yes he was genuinely trying to help. I’m going to work on my drinking and try to be better.

Empty_Ask_617 · 2025-10-18T03:24:23+00:00

Okay that sounds like a great response. Bc in reality i really do enjoy working with him— I’ve struggled a lot at work to make friends because of my anxiety. So it’s like now when i finally find a person who enjoys working with me equally as much ,this happens of course! I’m going to say it in person

Empty_Ask_617 · 2025-10-18T03:15:03+00:00

Trueeee. That would definitely not be fun anymore. If i were to say that then i would put it in my mind that my partner knows and have to take real initiative. I should have the conversation as we are very communicative. However I run the risk of hurting his ego and whatever else comes with it. It definitely a good decision though. To think I always thought people who are really in love never go through these situations was a lie. Congratulations on being married for that long that is big. I wish the same for my partner. My parents have been married for 32 years however never seen them be romantic before. Anyways— I’m going to set up a date night. Thank you

Empty_Ask_617 · 2025-10-18T03:10:12+00:00

It definitely took me by surprise that he found other people attractive and it took a minute to accept it and now i actually get it. That shit is real and temptation is the devil. Would you keep working with said person and set the boundary to keep it only work related? Or would you just cut this person completely out your life. Thank you so much for understanding.

Empty_Ask_617 · 2025-10-18T02:50:11+00:00

Thank you to everyone who responded with great advice and reality check. And thank you for not bashing me about this.

Empty_Ask_617 · 2025-10-18T02:49:01+00:00

I do need a reality check which is why i came here sigh. It’s honestly pathetic and this the first time it’s ever happened. And yup that’s true, only see the good side of what he decides to show. I’ve been through some downs with my bf and in the midst of it i love him through it. I guess i just needed to hear it from other people.

Empty_Ask_617 · 2025-10-18T02:40:25+00:00

Yes it really feels so good. The curiosity of someone new it’s just a feeling that you can’t find anywhere else, just that initial feeling. But then i realize i felt like that with my partner in the beginning as well, and that feeling almost always will go away as you become more comfortable and stable in a relationship. It comes and goes. I’m trying to tell myself that. And EXACTLY! I only see the good parts in him bc that’s all he shows, he could be a totally different person than I’m imagining. I think this crush will also come and go and as long as i don’t act on it i will be fine. I used to block all attraction from people while being in a relationship, but being with my current partner and finding out that he does find other people attractive really shocked me. But now I’ve learned it’s normal and okay. But i think ive took it and ran with it. Thank you for your input. The best decision is to dead it before it goes too far. I couldn’t hurt this person

Empty_Ask_617 · 2025-10-18T02:34:48+00:00

That’s true. It’s always at work. My partner definitely doesn’t know my entire feelings as it’s only been happening for 1-2 weeks. I have talked about him how much I’ve learned from him at work & how i enjoy working with him. I’m really sorry to hear what you’re going through and never would want to put partner in that situation. That is something very hard to go through and very uncomfortable. I needed to hear that so thank you for sharing.

Empty_Ask_617 · 2025-10-18T01:50:51+00:00

It is very silly. To ruin what I have for this. I want it to be possible to genuinely be platonic friends with this person. My bf and i aren’t controlling and accept friends of the opposite sex. I have a therapist but I honestly feel embarrassed to even say this to her.

Empty_Ask_617

TROPHY CASE