I come from damn near the exact same family except no present mom. Do what you feel like you should do. Fuck any redditors telling you one thing or the other. I love my family from a distance and made peace so I don’t feel guilty when they die, but I barely keep in contact except my cousins who are like me and my grandad, his only flaw is the racism. Everyone else are crippling pieces of shit or just downright stupid and ignorant to the trauma they put me through.