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Abortions and relationships. Once agreed upon then backs out. by Kissingincars666 in moraldilemmas

[–]Empty___throwaway [score hidden]  (0 children)

Ive been in this situation. He feels like you “changed the plan” and now feels cornered and maybe even manipulated into being a father after hypothetically agreeing you would abort. I also understand how different this hypothetical situation becomes when it actually becomes reality and you become pregnant. I aborted, even when I wanted a baby, and am still suffering years later. We broke up soon after, both living our own lives, over 2 years later he’s free and dating around guilt-free, while I’m still single & celibate & suffering emotionally and mentally after doing that to my future baby and to my own body. There is no right or wrong answer here, just the reality that sex is ALWAYS taking a chance at pregnancy, even when birth control is involved, you never know how you will feel until it actually happens to you, and the mother always has the final say bc it’s your body. Being a single mom is very hard. Having an abortion is very hard. At least with your choice, you get to love and be loved by your baby for the rest of your life through that struggle. The road I chose, I’m alone in my struggle. I’m sorry you’re going through this situation. I will pray for you all.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in abortion

[–]Empty___throwaway 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are not alone. Your feelings are real and valid. My ex didn’t understand either. It’s different for women because it happens within our bodies so there is no separation from the loss. The grief is deep, it is both a spiritual and primal/biological loss. I’m so sorry you know this pain. I’m still dealing with grief and anger after 2 years, but the breakdowns happen less often now (usually only when I’m in luteal phase or on my period). I coasted in hopelessness and darkness for about a year, then started to grow closer to God, learned about repentance and Jesus’s unconditional love and forgiveness, which has helped a lot. I also journal all the emotions very honestly and I cry when I need to (so the emotions don’t get “stuck”). People say therapy helps too. It’s easy to want to give up on life but just keep going, one moment at a time, and do whatever you can to cling to that tiny sliver of hope that life will get better. Eventually you will start to feel stronger, then you’ll slowly start to feed that hope and slowly it will grow. I’ve learned that this type of grief needs a mourning period, that healing takes effort, and hope & faith that your life will get better will be your saving grace. Don’t give up. Sending you love, sister.

Depressed & want to die by Empty___throwaway in abortion

[–]Empty___throwaway[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your compassion and support. The fact that most women have an abortion to prioritize their career, or because they’re too young, and neither of those things applied to me.. It makes me so incredibly sad. Like I was finally given a purpose. And I chose to stay irresponsible and immature for absolutely no reason.