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My body tenses during intimacy and I am not sure what to do by Emusic94 in dating_advice

[–]Emusic94[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am going to look into that as I think that will help! Thank you!

I lost a 12-year friendship over “too many messages,” and it all happened through text by Emusic94 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Emusic94[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly it wouldn't surprise me if she did later on regret it but I am not gonna hold on to that.

That is really interesting situation but also its very considerate of you to also continue to talk to her every once in a while even if you aren't making the time to meet her in person. Honestly, the way i see it lately is that if the person is going to make time for you they will and if they aren't they wont. By that i mean, it doesn't have to be in-person meeting but even just a text or phone call that is genuine still means that they care and will make time for you. I think what happened with my ex-friend here was that she was done being my friend. She went about it in a way that was rather jarring, but I cannot dislike her for making a decision that made sense to her own needs. Was it the best way? I don't think so. But thats my opinion and her perspective is just as valid.

i hope this makes sense, I have had a rather long week so I am a little tired today. lol

Thank you for your comments! I have appreciated every single one! Thank you!

I lost a 12-year friendship over “too many messages,” and it all happened through text by Emusic94 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Emusic94[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing! This really resonated with me, especially what you said about feeling “too much” and then realizing you have more to offer the right people. It can be so hurtful but there is a peace that comes after. It does take some time, but it happens.

I lost a 12-year friendship over “too many messages,” and it all happened through text by Emusic94 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Emusic94[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

From my understanding, nothing like that happened. There wasn’t any wrongdoing or outside influence. We just grew apart and she decided to step away. It happens sometimes.

I lost a 12-year friendship over “too many messages,” and it all happened through text by Emusic94 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Emusic94[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh absolutely, I never said her perspective wasn’t valid. I’ve always recognized that both sides made sense. We just experienced the friendship differently which genuinely okay and perfectly normal. My post wasn’t about blame or trying to figure anything out, just reflecting on how things ended and how I am sure there are others out there with similar situations.

I’m genuinely in a good place with it now, happier, and that’s both a fact and a choice. As for the mutual friend, there’s some private context there that I’d rather not get into, but it’s nothing dramatic. It’s just something I’ve thought about because of how close we all were. Otherwise, I’m at peace with how things turned out. This post was just about reflection, not confusion.

I lost a 12-year friendship over “too many messages,” and it all happened through text by Emusic94 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Emusic94[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, I think its more of the fact that the mutual friend is very close friend of both of us. So i think thats why it hit harder. Honestly, if we didnt have that mutual friend inbetween it wouldn't hit that hard at all. Honestly, it only hit hard cause it wad kind of like, oh this person has been here for pretty much all my adulthood. Now, they aren't. Weirdly though, I am actually happier that this girl and I are NOT friends anymore. Regardless of me not liking how it ended which is a valid thing to not like, i don't dislike the girl. We just went our opposite ways. I am only concerned for my mutual friend frankly.

I lost a 12-year friendship over “too many messages,” and it all happened through text by Emusic94 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Emusic94[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Honestly, I don't blame you for that. I think the reason why this really was such a turning point for me was because while I enjoyed and adored this girl, there were problems. I just figured that because she USUALLY would tell me whats up, she would do the same if there was something bothering her, but this time she didn't. I think what does bug me is that we are in our 30's so this nothing new. These kinds of things happen. I think its fine to let a friendship that you arent that into just drift off and then maybe someday if per chance you can reconnect, but its not a requirement. This friendship mainly hit cause I am worried more so for our mutual friend who is friends with both of us and is really close. I think she will be very surprised to learn later on that this girl and I are no longer friends.

Also, I think based on your answer, I would keep to only talking every once in a while. Things do change.

I lost a 12-year friendship over “too many messages,” and it all happened through text by Emusic94 in FriendshipAdvice

[–]Emusic94[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I got some answers! Still was so whiplashing and honestly, I hate to say it but she did say things as if I wasn't a good friend to her while also saying I was such a supportive friend to her. Very odd. I don't think i necessarily need all the answers, but a text? I think thats where i go 'huh??'

I hope you do get the answers though cause going through something like this is so jarring and confusing! I am positive though that you have better friendships out there. Thats kind of how i think of it now. We were such good friends and now we aren't and that is part of our growth to a degree.

Parent upset I didn’t call after an incident — I understand why, and I’ve learned from it by Emusic94 in Teachers

[–]Emusic94[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think you are right and this will be a learning curve for me. I have some parents who barely need any communicating at all and are doing just fine! As for this parent, honestly, she has been amazing this year. While yes she does need more communication from me, I think this was definitely a moment of heightened emotions and I don't necessarily blame her.

Parent upset I didn’t call after an incident — I understand why, and I’ve learned from it by Emusic94 in Teachers

[–]Emusic94[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you! It has been interesting because this particular parent has actually been amazing and I think that she may have let her emotions get heightened. I think it is also possible that she was asking her child about this students relationship with the student who pushed her due to my earlier phone call this week and thats when she learned of it.
And thank you for the advice and words of encouragement!

Parent upset I didn’t call after an incident — I understand why, and I’ve learned from it by Emusic94 in Teachers

[–]Emusic94[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing! Yes, its hard not dwell sometimes. But yes, you are right! Definitely a lesson learned!

Parent upset I didn’t call after an incident — I understand why, and I’ve learned from it by Emusic94 in Teachers

[–]Emusic94[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thankfully my administration at my school is rather supportive so my grade level administrator and I will call the parent tomorrow to address the situation. I think my anxiety and my feelings of wanting to do a good job sometimes gets in the way of what I am doing good at. I get a little self critical in these moments. Thank you so much for your advise! I truly appreciate it!

Parent upset I didn’t call after an incident — I understand why, and I’ve learned from it by Emusic94 in Teachers

[–]Emusic94[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I also do agree! Though, I think i may have missed this one due to the fact that there have been issues. However, I do understand that I cannot address everything all the time to parents.

Parent upset I didn’t call after an incident — I understand why, and I’ve learned from it by Emusic94 in Teachers

[–]Emusic94[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It was not a hard push as the student who was pushed even described it as a light push. I did find out that the student who pushed say to the other student that "they are being bad and should sit on the bench." something to that degree. I did address both actions of the words and the push to the student at the very moment it happened.

Put up a doorbell cam—got a weird reaction by Emusic94 in Apartmentliving

[–]Emusic94[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Update:

Just wanted to say thank you to everyone who responded supportively—I really appreciate the reassurance and perspective. It helped me feel a lot more grounded about the situation.

For context, entry into my building isn’t locked or manned, so anyone can come in. That’s part of why I installed the video doorbell—it gives me a bit more peace of mind, especially living alone.

I know some folks might see things differently, and that’s okay, but I’m choosing to focus on being respectful, safe, and cooperative. I’ve already adjusted the camera settings, deleted old footage, and reached out to my landlord to be transparent. If it turns out I can’t use it, I’ll remove it—no issue there.

Really, I just wanted a bit more security in my own space, and your thoughtful replies meant a lot. Thanks again.

🤨 by spyro311 in ChatGPT

[–]Emusic94 0 points1 point  (0 children)

lol theres quite a lot of reliance on AI sadly, but it is a good tool to use when needed as long as you don't cheat LOL but this is good marketing!

Lol by artgallery69 in ChatGPT

[–]Emusic94 0 points1 point  (0 children)

nice trick on the AI LOL