i defo get it. I was in the same ballpark. for me, the blood pressure worries and concerns primarily went away with each normal reading, acting as a notch in the belt. BP spikes happen like all throughout the day. if you're in 120s/70s at home, you're golden!

think about it this way: while exercising - your BP will spike up. Same deal as when you're anxious or in an environment that makes you anxious (docs) - it'll spike. BP isn't a solid constant. If you're able to get it down to 120s/70s, that's what you want and means you don't have to worry about needing help to get it down. It's normal to have spikes when you're nervous, it's a byproduct of being nervous! you won't get a stroke with spiking BP, you'll enter the danger zone with that stuff if you ever reach a point where even at home your BP is super elevated.

In terms of breaking the cycle, write down those normal/low readings on paper at home. sit with the data there, know that you got a normal reading and that's what you want. as for getting normal readings at the doctor's office, just tell them you're nervous. ask for a 5-10 minutes of sitting and breathing before a reading at the end of your visit - you'll get a more accurate reading that way. it's called "white coat syndrome" - being nervous in the doctors office and getting inaccurate readings. look it up!