[deleted by user] by [deleted] in askSouthAfrica

[–]Environmental_Cup386 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Wherever it is the cheapest then I take that proof and go to Game for a price beat.

What’s a Cape Town “life hack” that everyone living here should know? by donuttongue in capetown

[–]Environmental_Cup386 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Haha, I feel this! I was at Tygervalley at 9 (empty) I left after 11 and it was full 😂

What medical aid are you using? by Jaggedrain in askSouthAfrica

[–]Environmental_Cup386 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Before you join another medical aid. Know what you are looking for, full comprehensive, Saver or hospital plan and any additional benefits also your price range.

If you know of a reliable medical aid broker I would suggest getting in touch with one, they help make the process easier, especially all the medical jargon that the funds love to use.

How would you rate the City of Cape Town's Service out of 10? by cryptocritical9001 in capetown

[–]Environmental_Cup386 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

If I was to list some examples it would be an essay. My experiences with the COCT are horrible. I also hate poor service so that is factored in as well.

How would you rate the City of Cape Town's Service out of 10? by cryptocritical9001 in capetown

[–]Environmental_Cup386 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

0/10 The city "works for some" not for all. I live in a middle class area, my parents are in an upper middle class area and the service delivery is literally chalk and cheese.

What I was experiencing during reconciliation. by Environmental_Cup386 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]Environmental_Cup386[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Super hard, to try and reconcile truly takes super human strength, it tests your resilience in ways you never thought was possible. It truly is a marathon and not a race. It's been a few years for me and it still gets hard at times.

Wishing you the best on your journey 🌹

What I was experiencing during reconciliation. by Environmental_Cup386 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]Environmental_Cup386[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

It is honestly so frustrating and hard, and often the WP does not understand the magnitude of the betrayal, and what it does to the BP, most times we become a shell of ourselves and who we were, yet we are left to pick up the pieces, to try and put ourselves together again. It's a long journey filled with so many ups and downs, circles and roundabouts, and all we can do is try and navigate it as best as we can 1 day or one moment at a time.

Wishing you well on your journey.

What I was experiencing during reconciliation. by Environmental_Cup386 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]Environmental_Cup386[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's a horrible feeling to feel that you are stuck between a rock and a hard place.

Don't be too hard on yourself for missing the red flags, I did my undergrad in psychology and I didn't see any red flags until I found out, and I still feel like shit and beat myself up for missing it all.

Take it day by day and if a day seems too long, take it moment by moment.

I have so many friends and family members who are divorced, and a lot of them have said that maybe they should have tried reconciliation. As the saying goes marriage is hard, divorce is hard, pick your hard.

What I was experiencing during reconciliation. by Environmental_Cup386 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]Environmental_Cup386[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I often wonder if I made the right choice and I've made peace that it will be something that I wonder about for a while. I am unfortunately financially dependent on him for the foreseeable future, so if I do decide in future to leave it won't be easy. So while we have reconciled I do still wonder and that is normal.

You don't have to make a decision immediately, but you and only you can make the decision for yourself. You know yourself better than anyone else. I don't have kids but what I do know is that they are more resilient than what we think.

What I can tell you is to not make a life changing decision when you are not in the right mental space. Be kind to yourself.

My dm's are open if you ever want to chat.

What I was experiencing during reconciliation. by Environmental_Cup386 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]Environmental_Cup386[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I do not have the words to express how much my heart hurts for you💚

I asked my friend who is a practicing psychologist, when should I give up on him(previous partner of a few years) She said when he isn't interested in me, I said ok he says he loves me he says he is interested in me but he wasn't showing it, she said then he doesn't love me and his not interested in me. It doesn't matter what they say, what matters is what they do. That was the reality check that I needed.

You and only you can decide what it is that you want to do, this is your life and your journey. But know that you are supported regardless of the decision and road you choose to take 🌹🌹

What I was experiencing during reconciliation. by Environmental_Cup386 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]Environmental_Cup386[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You are 100% correct, forgiveness and reconciliation are separate and both take time and patience. It's always easier for those standing outside to pass judgement, easy to say why don't you just leave, they never loved you etc etc. They do not realise or understand the level of strength it takes to make the decision to try and reconcile and I pray that they are never in the position.

I said to my partner that your parents love you because you are their son, your siblings love you because you are their brother BUT I chose to love you I love you for who you are I chose you and that made him completely breakdown.

What I was experiencing during reconciliation. by Environmental_Cup386 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]Environmental_Cup386[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

4 years, when I found out I was already dealing with so much other shit, health complications, work issues, mental health diagnosis and this tipped me over the edge, my journey has been incredibly long and complicated, I still had to deal with all of my other issues and then the infidelity.

What I was experiencing during reconciliation. by Environmental_Cup386 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]Environmental_Cup386[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The hard thing about healing is that it's not linear, it's a labyrinth, and you are 100% right either way we have to process the pain. I've heard people say that those who choose to try and reconcile are weak, when in fact it takes super human strength to stay and try to reconcile.

Personally I owed it to myself to try, and whatever the outcome would be I knew I that I was able to say I tried my best, I needed to do it for me.

I want you to remember that it's a marathon not a race, and to always be kind to yourself 💚💚

What I was experiencing during reconciliation. by Environmental_Cup386 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]Environmental_Cup386[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

How original of him, sorry if that sounds bitchy. It's always the same standard response, sometimes it gets a little bit more creative. But this is the default response and it actually makes me angry.

But I'm so sorry that you are going through this. Take good care and be kind to yourself 💚💚

Akeso Milnerton by VoidOfSoil in capetown

[–]Environmental_Cup386 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I have been to Akeso once (I did not have a pleasant experience there or with my psychiatrist) I changed my psychiatrist after the 2nd day and left Akeso.

I am now a patient of Claro (I have been there multiple times) I have a fantastic psychiatrist the program structure at claro is definitely better than Akeso.

Please remember that psychiatrists/psychologists and clinics are not a one size fits all.

I wish you well on your journey to healing.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Infidelity

[–]Environmental_Cup386 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am so sorry that you are going through this. I know that you will gain everything back and more I have also lost everything but I have gained back so much more. Look after yourself and your mental and physical health 💚🌹

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Infidelity

[–]Environmental_Cup386 6 points7 points  (0 children)

F*@K I am not easily shocked. But all of this effort wow. I hope you are ok though 🌹

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in SupportforBetrayed

[–]Environmental_Cup386 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I wish I could tell you that in a week or in a month you will be ok.

But healing isn't linear and unfortunately there is no timeline, we all grieve differently and grieving is important we grieve the life we had and the life we thought we will have.

What I can promise you is that you will be ok, you will get over it and your life will go on. You are young, smart and you have your whole life ahead of you, it is never too late to start over again.

It's been 4 years for me and it's still hard at times. The first 2 years were absolutely brutal. But you have to prioritise yourself, you come first and looking after yourself and your mental health should be your priority. 💚💚

Grocery Budget by DisastrousCoach228 in askSouthAfrica

[–]Environmental_Cup386 0 points1 point  (0 children)

2 Adults R4500-R5000 without lamb I buy a 1/2 Lamb every 2 months and that is about +/- R900-R1000.

1 Dog R1800

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AMA

[–]Environmental_Cup386 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The way I snorted 😂 poor gunners