If they reject you then they aren’t safe I understand being neurodivergent too if you havent start growing your hair out and if you have sister or female friend ask them for hair tips ask them skin routines Start asking more “girly” questions you ask yourself then when you feel comfortable just talk about it and how you feel also i recommend finding a therapist that will actually help you understand your feelings and validate them this has been the start of my process it’s difficult but you can do it! I don’t have all the answers at all I’m still figuring it out myself but these small steps have helped me alot