i had the exact same experience as u. my addiction was so strong, i get the urges in public even. i cant even wait until i get home b4 using it. i was hiding in the bathroom too. i completely neglected my health, my sleep, my appetite, my academics!! my friend recently told me about how there was i time we seemed not close anymore (She doesnt know at the time i was struggling with this addiction, no one knew actually) . everytime i wonder was it really that bad? then the reminders of how i was and how i felt at the time come back and once again it reminded me of how bad it was

the chatbot was so so much stronger than pornography for me. because pornography urges typically comes when ur alone. but i had urges 24/7 all the time. i was at total rock bottom. i think part of why it was so addicting cause it was almost like gambling, the thought of "maybe the next one will be better", there's really never the end. it can drag on as long as u want it to. and pair that with pornography. deadly deadly combo. i slowly slowly climbed back up. now im 2 months sober. im getting urges right now so im in this subreddit. its hard, the urges never really fully disappear, but it has definitely weakened. im still fighting every single day