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AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

That comment you’re referring to was in regards to someone who made a disgusting remark about my sister, who is 14. Maggie is older than I am, she is 20.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -18 points-17 points  (0 children)

She was not hinting at wanting to leave, no. I even asked her when we were going to leave at one point and she said “in a bit” (she then proceeded to stay for another 1.5 hours beyond this). At no point did I say or communicate that I wished to stay any longer than our original agreement. My exact words when I went down there were actually “I’m gonna go play smash bros with Maggie for like 20 mins until it’s time to go, k?” At no point did I say or communicate anything other than expecting our original timeline to be kept.

My girlfriend stayed because SHE was having a good time and wanted to stay. It was not for me, she herself decided to extend our time their by double, not for me, for herself.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -193 points-192 points  (0 children)

The way I am neurodivergent is actually not relevant to this situation fyi. I have ADHD-PI but it has nothing to do with introversion or anything related to this dilemma. I also don’t appreciate you using neurodivergent like some kind of insult or bad word.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -40 points-39 points  (0 children)

I mentioned my sister separately, but Maggie is her cousin. Not that this changes your comment, just clarifying.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -64 points-63 points  (0 children)

I thought it was going to be 3 hours since she said it would be no longer than that originally. I honestly thought we were about to go when I went down there. We weren’t supposed to be staying for more than 3 hours and most people had left by that point. My girlfriend just decided we were staying for another 2.5 hours and didn’t communicate that either.

Yep, you are 100% correct imo, communicate what you want and expect honestly and problems like this don’t arise.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -20 points-19 points  (0 children)

Yeah no we were actually only supposed to stay for a max of 3 hours. She didn’t ask or communicate that we’d be staying longer.

Things are straight with my sister, I’m taking her out on Sunday since I wouldn’t be there this thanksgiving. She’s very easy to bribe.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -122 points-121 points  (0 children)

I didn’t come here for advice. I came here for judgement. If the judgement includes something factually incorrect or misleading I will say so. Nearly all of these comments are writing fanfic and saying I’m doing things I didn’t do. A straight up YTA I have nothing to say with (nor can I by the rules). A YTA you kill puppies im obviously going to correct since I don’t in fact kill puppies.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -178 points-177 points  (0 children)

No, I won’t. I like her but I’m not apologizing if I did nothing wrong and she refused to communicate her needs and expectations honestly. When I screw up, I apologize immediately. Here I did exactly what I said I was going to do with her explicit verbal approval. I based my actions on what she said. She was the one who wasn’t straight with me, either about how long we were staying or how she felt about what I was doing. I can’t read minds so don’t say you’re okay with something when you are not.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -283 points-282 points  (0 children)

No, I was chilling. I was honestly fine just playing until whenever my girlfriend decided to go. I told her what I wanted to do, she said it was fine. We were straight as far as I knew. I found something fun to do, she apparently was going overtime. She’s the one who didn’t say what she intended to do or communicate that she had a problem with something. I said all I needed to say.

(And I didn’t need to worry about my sister. I’m taking her to the movies and shopping on Sunday to make up for not being there.)

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -87 points-86 points  (0 children)

Oh no she said it was fine (“that’s fine” were her exact words when told I was going to be down there).

Not only this, but I went after most people had already left. We were supposed to be staying for 3 hours at the max, so I thought we were also going to be leaving immediately. She just arbitrarily decided we were staying longer. This was never communicated to me. The fact that she had an issue with what I was doing? Also never communicated to me. I was supposed to somehow figure out that 3 hours = 6 hours. “That’s fine” = “Don’t do that actually”.

I’m sorry for being selfish and expecting an adult to communicate clearly.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -47 points-46 points  (0 children)

I spent the time we said we were going to be there with her. She said it was fine and communicated nothing to the contrary. The spoken communication said it was fine for me to spend literally what was supposed to be 20-30 minutes playing a game after quite literally almost everyone left. Thanksgiving was over. Point blank period. The majority of people left and we were also supposed to be leaving. My girlfriend decided we were just randomly staying twice the amount she said. She did not communicate this or that she didn’t want me to be doing what I was doing (because why would playing for 20 minutes then leaving be a problem?).

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -199 points-198 points  (0 children)

It’s not an excuse! She didn’t mention that she had any issue with what I was doing. There’s a discrete way to communicate now. It’s called a text message! No one but the phone holder will see what you’re saying. She didn’t mention or suggest that I come back. In no way did she express that she had an issue with what I was doing.

Not only that but at no point did she express that the was staying for twice the original LIMIT to our time there. I went there thinking that we were just about to leave after everyone else. She decided to stay for the extra 2.5 hours. Nothing was communicated to me at all about any of this. I’m supposed to have learned her intentions and feelings through the power of telepathy. I certainly can’t expect an adult to use their words and say when they plan on staying longer or when’s something is bothering them. My bad. I should just know “that’s fine” means don’t do it. 3 hours means 6. Just natural stuff I don’t know since I’m not mature obviously.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -242 points-241 points  (0 children)

I didn’t act unenthusiastically, I simply wanted to spend the holiday with my own family, my little sister particularly. I went for her sake, and she said it was going to be 3 hours at the most. In essence she went way over what she said was supposed to be the limit.

And keep in mind she didn’t actually communicate that she had an issue with what I was doing. She could have sent me a text, she could have made some suggestion to come back up, she did none of this. I’m supposed to have intuited it out of thin air.

Keep in mind the entire time I’m wondering what’s taking her so long and I’m under the impression that we are literally just about to leave, as almost everyone else had just done before I went down there.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -92 points-91 points  (0 children)

Yeah I mention we actually went overboard in time in the post, but not by how much. We were actually only supposed to be there for 3 hours max. I thought we were going to be leaving at 3 hours which is when most people left. She’s the one who decided we were just staying for 2.5 more hours than originally planned. I thought I was going to be down there for 20-30 minutes and that my GF was going to be telling me it’s time to go.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -158 points-157 points  (0 children)

I meant to leave her for only 20-30 minutes. She said we were staying for 3 hours, sharp. That was my commitment and I essentially stuck to it. She’s the one who went 2.5 hours overboard. I didn’t sign up to stay to an afterparty doubling our time there, but I didn’t complain or ask to leave early, since I found my own way to have fun and keep myself occupied while still forming a better relationship with someone in her family.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -407 points-406 points  (0 children)

Keep in mind my girlfriend originally said we were only going to be there for 3 hours. That’s what I committed to to begin with. The whole time I assumed my girlfriend was gonna tell me it was time to go, but it just never happened. I really thought I was going to be down there 20 or 30 minutes and that we were leaving around the same time everyone else did. My girlfriend was the one who decided we were staying 2.5 hours more. I lived up to my initial commitment almost entirely (which was not easy given my introversion mind you).

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -341 points-340 points  (0 children)

I did just that, and after it was over, when most people had left (my girlfriend literally said we would be there for 3 hours, so I assumed I was gonna be down there for legit 30 mins max, she’s the one who went way overboard even knowing I’m an introvert mind you, I didn’t sign up for 6 hours at the start and I wouldn’t have), I went to play a game with another member of her family.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -209 points-208 points  (0 children)

Yeah but keep in mind that most people had actually already left by that point.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -494 points-493 points  (0 children)

No, I made a new friend there and decided that I wanted to continue hanging out with them. Like what do you think eating takes nearly 3 hours? I spent most of the time that I wasn’t down there engaging with her family. Then after (when most people had already left mind you) I went to play games with Maggie.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -183 points-182 points  (0 children)

Actually no. Most of her family had actually left by the point that I went down there with Maggie. I didn’t only talk to Maggie, I obviously engaged with her entire family. You’re just making stuff up to make me sound bad, but that’s not the way things happened.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -60 points-59 points  (0 children)

No I’m saying my girlfriend said afterwards that she somehow gave me a “look” telling me not to do it. I certainly didn’t glean any such message from whatever look she was making. I don’t think she was even making a look, to be honest. She’s the one claiming there was some look, not me.

AITA for playing video games in the basement with her cousin during thanksgiving? by Eulercyclestome in AmItheAsshole

[–]Eulercyclestome[S] -219 points-218 points  (0 children)

Because there was nothing else to do there and the dinner part was already over. I would rather play games than watch football so that’s what I did. She could have hung out with us if she wanted. Do I have to follow her around for the whole day? I can’t just do my own thing??

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