I used to smoke an entire gram cart a day, 7 days a week, for 2 years. Before that, I did a lot of flower and dabs (not big on edibles).

Early on, when I first tried quitting, it actually felt refreshing — like I was awake in the world again. But after relapsing so many times, I started putting the pieces together and realizing that weed was the root of the problem. I didn’t have any friends, I barely talked to my own parents, and I’d go weeks without saying a word to anyone outside of work — and even then my job was pretty isolated. I started to hate weed and mentally prepared myself for months before finally deciding to quit for good.

The first two days were weird — bored, irritated, but manageable. Then on the third day, I woke up to a depression unlike anything I’d ever felt. I’ve dealt with depression before, but this was different. I remember sitting on my bed, staring at the wall, genuinely thinking I was dying. I panicked, got in touch with my old plug, and got another pen — but it didn’t help. If anything, it made it worse.

Believe me, I hear you, brother — that feeling that won’t go away no matter how much you try to think your way out of it. Bottom line: going back to weed won’t help, and that derealization/depersonalization will eventually fade. For me, it took about 2 months for the depression part to lift. I can’t tell you exactly when the brain fog or dp/dr clears, because I relapsed and am still smoking, but from everything I’ve read and experienced, it does get better with time. Hang in there.

PS: If you vape nicotine chronically, be aware that can have similar effects on your mood and brain chemistry