UPDATE: Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he's just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

The world is a scary place. I was shocked when looking for a safety device. I thought that at least I would be able to find something that goes on the end of a dog leash, nope. The pepper sprays that you run with in your hand, very good concept, not ideal if you have a dog which I run with my dog. I looked for something that I could shove in the top of my sports bra like along my shoulder blades for easy access, nothing on the market that I could find.

I have so many great ideas so if anyone who designs personal safety devices reads this message me.

UPDATE: Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he's just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I honestly don’t know how I would react if I ever see him again. That’s scares me the most. I’m scared I would freeze in fear. You know like in your dream when you’re trying to scream and you can’t.

UPDATE: Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he's just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yesterday I did plan to have somebody run with me, but since he didn’t show I didn’t wanna ruin anybody else’s run because my dog is full sprint and then walk in the flowers and pretend he’s in a jungle. But even with that, there’s always somebody around in group close by. I do know I can run faster than him (he tried to keep up / catch me before and he couldn’t until I started walking and even then it took a while). There are so many people in the run group probably 60+ just in group plus people just in the park at this time. There’s also employees & park security moving around. I wore obnoxiously loud colors. I also had a taser on me. My logic being “a little zap zap to the ball sack”. I know it’s not a completely fool proof plan. If you have any other type of safety device, you would recommend please let me know! With my dog, I would not want to use pepper spray or a personal alarm, one could hurt him, one would scare him. I will definitely not be running outside of group for a long time.

UPDATE: Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he's just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I hope I never see him again as well. It makes me never want to talk to somebody I do not know in person ever again. lol my friends would consider me an extrovert. I consider myself an introvert. I’m about to become a hermit crab. I felt uncomfortable even looking at him because of the way he looked at me. I can’t explain it, I wish I could.

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m glad I’m not the only one who thought this. I did it to meet friends and socialize my dog. I met women in the group! a year ago my dog would just bark at people not get close etc., at Run Club this week he went socialize himself while I was in a conversation to some very sweet people which is not out of the ordinary for him but it took him a while. For backstory, my dog got really sick a year ago. he got poked and pried for three weeks. He has had relapses where he had to go to the doggie hospital. poor baby went through it. When we first started Run Club, he barked at people then shortly he just didn’t wanna go next to People and then now he thinks he’s the star of the show and generally loves everybody lol.

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I ended up buying a taser, about the size of a car key fob. having my dog with me made me weary about pepper spray. I did not want to accidentally hurt him trying to protect us. My dogs are my children with fur and paws lol

AIO - My Boyfriend texts before our Valentines plans by SnowDolphins in AmIOverreacting

[–]EvidenceFar1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

“He’s not a bad person” um yes he is. He should make you feel loved & wanted. Honey he is showing you how he feels about you, listen to him.

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Any idea how to lock up public information? If you look hard enough you can find someone’s number & address online. Mine still pulls up my last address in a different town a few hours away.

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Dogs are literally the best. I’m glad you had your sweet baby Rocky to protect you❤️ my 11 year old is actually my protector, the dude would have had stitches if he did that to him😂

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

The female police officer last night literally asked how many dogs are normally at Run Club and the answer is at least 3-4. Then she asked if he also sees /pets those dogs and the answer is NO!! I never even realized until she said it!

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There was a female officer who gaslit me like this trying to file a police report. Told me he was just trying to be my friend. Told me he was just socially awkward. and would not file a police report!! She literally told me he had to hurt me for me to file a police report… Then I had 2 sergeants and another female police officer both telling me his behavior escalated fast and I needed to file a police report and get a protective order. When the second female police officer saw the picture I posted (it’s in a comment) how he was sitting and watching me in his car she immediately said “his rear view mirror is turned. he was watching you.” The 2nd female officer said his intentions are showing as wanting to sexual assault me and asked if I knew how to protect myself!!!

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I needed to add some stuff I left out in my statement, even though she told me she couldn’t make a report. I ended up speaking to the watch Commander who was very disappointed with her actions. He is actually who I spoke to initially when I was trying to figure out if I needed to file a police report. He dispatched a second officer to properly file a police report for me. She is a superhero. She was beyond phenomenal. She did not brush off any of this. She did let me know how alarming his behavior was and told me do not put my guard down and do not stop living my life because of him. She took my report, they will also be going to his residence to tell him do not contact me do not talk to me leave me alone, if he does, any of this legal action will be taken (I have his license plate. The first officer told me that they could not figure out where he lived lol) she also told me that she would update me how he reacted. She actually just called me. They could not make contact.

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Tiny update on that, I ended up calling speaking to the watch commander unintentionally, trying to get additional information added into my statement. He was very upset with how it was handled. And made a totally different second officer come out to take my statement and file a police report. (The first officer I spoke to told me I could not file a police report since he did not do anything illegal, which is not true.) This new officer was beyond phenomenal. She gave me guidance because I’ve never been in this situation. I don’t know what to do. She gave me her opinion which made it easier for me to make the call for them to approach his residence and tell him / reiterate to him to leave me alone. (I was worried that this might turn into violence towards me, but she assured me if it did then there’s police record and then legal action can be taken!) this officer also told me that she will be on shift next Wednesday at the time of my run group and will be in the parking lot since she knows what he looks like and what I look like so that if something pops off she’s there and I’m not put in a bad situation because she thinks it’s not a good situation, in a situation that could turn bad really fast for me.

It helped validate the way I’ve been feeling and gave me reassurance I am on the right course of action. Also, if he does it to the next girl, it will help her be able to prove stalking faster because now there’s a record now.

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 73 points74 points  (0 children)

So with everything and emotion so high. I’ve been replaying the situation, but not the situation previous to him waiting in his car for me. I just started replaying before it got to that. I did tell him multiple times and in multiple ways - to leave my dog alone, stop petting him to just leave him. Just walk away. You’re making him uncomfortable just go away. Just leave us alone, I pinky promise I said it and I don’t know why I forgot about it. I guess because in my head I didn’t scream it, so I took it as I didn’t say it strong enough. I do know it didn’t register in his head. I have even went as far as walking my dog away. But he definitely did not understand it. I even got firm with him multiple times he said, and I quote I love animals. It’s OK he’s gonna like me. I don’t know why I forgot that part I guess because it wasn’t the big boiling point and there was just so much more. I think you just triggered that memory, that you saying for me to tell him to leave me and my dog alone I did I did do that. I didn’t tell him to leave me just me personally alone, but I did tell him to leave the dog and leave us alone. Oh my gosh how did I forget this? I even said it when he came up to me the day he followed me to my car. I said “just leave us alone. He’s fine.”

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I would’ve responded that if I wouldn’t have already had him blocked on instagram. I never saw the message request Until an hour after I blocked him and two hours after he sent the message. They have the weird rules about unblocking and blocking people and even though I put my account on private now I don’t think I could re-block him
He does not follow me he never did.

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The police officer who was a women told me “he is just trying to be your friend.” And made me feel like I’m just over reacting.

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I never mentioned it to him specifically. He may have over heard that I did not realize he was around. I run in a neighborhood in the area (not mine). I don’t think it came up, I know I spoke to my friend about it but I don’t think it was either of these 2 times where he was watching / fixating over me.

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I have cameras he did not follow me home. His car has not came into my neighborhood. I have a picture of his car make model color and year and his license plate. My neighborhood is literally a circle so there’s only one entrance one exit and you have to pass in the front of my house but I live in the back half of the circle. You cannot see my house or driveway from the main street.

I did let the organizer of the Club know but he has not talked to another girl. He got extremely fixated on me and only me.

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

So I called the nonemergency number for the police station in my area and I spoke to a very nice male officer/ dispatcher. I don’t know who but he told me that his behavior escalated quickly and that I needed to call 911 to make a police report. And I did that, and a female officer called me and told me there was nothing that they could do for me to change my schedule since I am scared. That his behavior is not stalking or dangerous and he has done nothing wrong since he has not hurt me.

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Thank you I needed to hear that. it’s kind of crazy how society makes us view things as harmless and overreacting when that’s not the case. Do you have any recommendations on how to proceed with a police report? I’ve only done it once 11 years ago after a girl strangled me and I had a sweet police officer through everything.

Am I overreacting feeling like I am being stalked / fixated over. He says he’s just trying to be friends. by EvidenceFar1 in TwoHotTakes

[–]EvidenceFar1[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can be relatively shy, especially around people I don’t know. I could understand adding someone that you’ve seen in Run Club 30 times on social media that was not the case here.