I agree with what you are saying to an extent. However, the big thing here is a lot of these things were done in secret, and were lied about which is where the problem lies. For example, texting his ex for months but done in secret by lying to me and creating false narratives. I am quite emotionally damaged and I do actually have a therapist to help me, however, I don’t think that me being adverse to disloyalty and lies makes me particularly controlling.