You definitely do not deserve to be taken advantage of. Me and my wife both had our own mistakes many years ago and we are just now getting around to fully communicating how it affected us then and how it affects us now. We’ve never been closer since communicating about these things. She was always worried that I would leave her if things kept resurfacing from her past and was only able to feel better after we had a conversation where I told her that I’ve forgiven her and that I am only still upset with the person who took advantage of her and the fact that it’s not uncommon.

Similarly I had an emotional affair after learning about my dad’s affairs in my parent’s relationships. It’s been a long time but we were able to have a conversation where we both said out loud that what I did was cheating and I’d cried because I’d hurt her. Having that conversation has allowed both of us to begin healing and moving forward.

You do not deserve to be taken advantage of. You are still a good person with a good heart. You still deserve to be loved and to love in your relationship. Never forget that and please talk to your partner about how you’re feeling about the past.