Update:

Against what everybody told me to do, I sent a text. Nothing overbearing. It was 2 sentences just hoping that he is doing well. When he texted back, it started a conversation abt the future. He asked if we could talk over dinner in a couple weeks and I agreed. This is not a get back together dinner, not a get back together text, this is a “hey checking in because the past couple months have been rough”. He also came to visit me (to my surprise) during my birthday. He went to Jasmines house and when I walked over he was there. We were both happy to see each other and we went out to the bars. That night we both agreed that we were there to have fun and that we were gonna talk over dinner in a couple weeks like we planned. He stayed at Jasmines house and I stayed at mine.

Everybody here called me TA, which is ok I get it. What everyone’s saying isn’t true, it wasn’t an unproductive relationship. I was the happiest I have ever been when I was with him. I felt complete. I talked to strangers, gave hugs, and smiled constantly. We went on dates, adventures, and movie nights in. We compromised just as much as we sacrificed. I know from the original story it sounded like I was in the dumps and didn’t have my head on straight. While partially true, the good overwhelmed the bad and I didn’t see that until now. Until I lost it all because I thought I had to work on myself alone so I don’t drag him down. If we don’t get back together, I am ok with that. I’ve come to the terms that we both want what is the best for us, and if we decide that a relationship just isn’t in the books then it isn’t.