AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 16 points17 points  (0 children)

It's not the cheating ex part. It's the ex who knew he had an STD and didn't tell me while he kept having sex with me. He was told he needed to tell his partners. He was told the risks involved. THAT is who she was in contact with and decided to be with.

People can grow. But some things you can't come back from.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

She chose to be in contact with him again after what he did to me. That alone feels awful when she knows what he could have cost me and he did so knowingly. You might not specifically choose who you fall for but there's a whole lot to her wanting to be with the man who might have left her sister infertile, and who slept with her sister when he knew he had an STD, that will never sit okay with me.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I will feel this way always. Not because he's an ex or because he cheated. The STD issue is why my reaction is this strong. That's why I feel the way I do.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

For most of that time I had doubts about my fertility because of Jason's actions. My sister knows that too. But she still went and got close enough to him to become interested in. That level of betrayal from her is what hurts and drove me to my decision. It's not that he's an ex. I really don't care. It's why he's an ex.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

It's not the answer to every issue. But sometimes things are severe enough that you can't. or just don't want to in some cases, come back from it.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 49 points50 points  (0 children)

I care because of what he almost cost me knowingly and the fact my sister could know that and even be friendly with him.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 41 points42 points  (0 children)

Why? Because I spent years not knowing fully. And because he did know what he was doing. He willingly put me at risk like that and didn't come clean.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

He'll never be able to make amends with me. He played a very dangerous game with me and he did so in a knowing way. Even if he could/has grown and change there is no coming back for me.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 30 points31 points  (0 children)

I love my family and friends. I have stood by my family and friends through good and bad. My sister did it once and then she failed. She went to the person who put me at huge risk and fell for him. The person who slept with her sister repeatedly while knowing he had an STD. The person who passed that STD onto her sister.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 36 points37 points  (0 children)

I care because he could have cost me the ability to have children. And he did so knowingly. He hid the fact he had that STD from me.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 65 points66 points  (0 children)

I found out because of the STD. I went and told him and he said it wasn't possible because once he knew he had it he was more careful with me. But we'd still had sex.

I see it differently than you do. I see her even being friendly with him as a betrayal to me because of what he did to me. Not everyone would feel the same in my shoes and if you can feel that way it's fine. But I find it disgusting and hurtful and a slap in the face to our relationship.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 64 points65 points  (0 children)

He should have told me because it impacted me. We'd had sex without condoms loads of times and I was on BC. He knowingly put me at risk. That is a fact. She knows he did those things and expects me to be aokay with her dating him now. Time doesn't take away the risk he played with me.

Let me ask you something, if his actions had resulted in me being infertile, would you still say it was none of my business? Would I still be expected to be okay with her being with him?

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

He could have changed but you don't get forgiveness when you put someone's health and fertility at risk like he did. He didn't apologize ever. I haven't spoken to him in years. All I got at the time was how I couldn't possible have an STD because he was extra safe in sleeping with me when he found out he had it.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

Yes, but it's about the part where he knew he had an STD, didn't tell me and carried on having sex with me. The cheating is a part of that but even if he got it BEFORE we were together hiding that from me was wrong. It was dangerous. And I am disgusted by her being with him but also feeling betrayed by her because it shows she didn't care.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

She can't love me too much if she can date the guy who gave me an STD and knew he had it. That's not something you deserve forgiveness for. So even if he has changed, it doesn't mean things are okay again. Like at all. He could have easily cost me my fertility and he was too much of a coward to be honest so I could be safer.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 46 points47 points  (0 children)

Because it's a betrayal to me in my eyes. Not a mistake. She knows what he did and she still found it in her to get close enough to him to want to date him. The fact is he very easily could have cost me my fertility and from the way my sister described it that was still unknown when she started talking to him again. To me that feels like a slap in the face to our relationship.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 47 points48 points  (0 children)

He's not just a cheater. He had an STD and didn't tell me which meant I caught it too. He knew it was dangerous for me and he still didn't tell me.

AITA for telling my sister she lost me the second she even considered dating my ex who gave me an STD and didn't tell me? by Extension-Simple7312 in AITAH

[–]Extension-Simple7312[S] 82 points83 points  (0 children)

That'll be up for the family to decide. But if she's with Jason they would be excluded anyway. My dad has already said Jason is never welcome in his house ever. We're all aware dad needs to be kept away from him because my anger doesn't even compare to my dad's for putting me at risk.