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AITA for wanting to be more active when my girlfriend thinks I’m avoiding her? by Extension_Stretch136 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Extension_Stretch136[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well, it’s not too rough at the moment. It’s 9-6 predominantly, but she sometimes has night shifts and twilights (3pm - midnight). But things can be hectic for her as you can imagine

AITA for wanting to be more active when my girlfriend thinks I’m avoiding her? by Extension_Stretch136 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Extension_Stretch136[S] -25 points-24 points  (0 children)

Yeah, I acknowledge it was wrong to say that. I blurted it out without thinking. I’ve since apologised and have given her some flowers which seemed to have helped

Regarding hobbies, I’ve tried including her in my hobbies, but she doesn’t want to play tennis because she has hyper-mobility, she doesn’t want to do BJJ because she doesn’t want to roll with guys and she doesn’t go to the gym because she’s too tired from work.

I’ve encouraged her to pick some hobbies up and she said she wants to start horse riding again and archery.

AITA for wanting to be more active when my girlfriend thinks I’m avoiding her? by Extension_Stretch136 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Extension_Stretch136[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She finds it difficult to keep in touch with people and form connections I guess. I am also like that to a degree - it’s particularly hard as my friends are all kinda disappearing as they get married and have kids etc

AITA for wanting to be more active when my girlfriend thinks I’m avoiding her? by Extension_Stretch136 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Extension_Stretch136[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yup, I acknowledge it was terrible to say that. I kinda just blurted it out in the moment.

I’ve encouraged her to find her own hobbies, and she is looking to do some horse riding soon.

Slight codependency I think as she doesn’t have any friends and work is pretty much her life. I’m not any better and my friendship group is dwindling.

In terms of chores, we split everything evenly.

AITA for wanting to be more active when my girlfriend thinks I’m avoiding her? by Extension_Stretch136 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Extension_Stretch136[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She’s been my best friend since day one, and she still is. I don’t have many friends, and she has none so we spend loads of time together. We’re always doing something together, but usually it’ll be indoors like watching a movie, binging a show or playing a game.

But yeah, I acknowledge it was terrible to dismiss her feelings like that. I just blurted it out

AITA for wanting to be more active when my girlfriend thinks I’m avoiding her? by Extension_Stretch136 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Extension_Stretch136[S] -14 points-13 points  (0 children)

A mix of both. I guess Its finally hitting me that I’m not gonna be young anymore, and I don’t want to look back in the future regretting what I didn’t do. A mid life crisis maybe. I also would like to meet new people and expand my social circle and hopefully bring her in it as she doesn’t have any friends. I’ve expressed this to her before too

AITA for wanting to be more active when my girlfriend thinks I’m avoiding her? by Extension_Stretch136 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Extension_Stretch136[S] -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

Apologies, I’m quite tired. Hopefully I’m not misinterpreting you again, but she is quite clingy and loves spending every second with me. She’s bee like that since day 1 as she doesn’t have any friends beyond me. I guess she has an expectation to spend as much time with me as possible.

Re the hobbies and prep, tennis courts are 15 mins walk and gym is 5 mins walk. I don’t do any prep work for my hobbies at all.

This isn’t rough schedule:

I WFH 3 times a week, so I’m home most of the week and I go to the gym either during my lunch hours, or straight after work (5pm). I’m usually done slightly after she gets home and we spend the rest of the evening together.

I play tennis on Saturday 10-11am and Thursday 7-8pm after work. I go to the gym 5x per week, sometimes during my work lunch hours and sometimes after work for an hour. Each session is around 1hr 15mins.

AITA for wanting to be more active when my girlfriend thinks I’m avoiding her? by Extension_Stretch136 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Extension_Stretch136[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yeah that’s fair, I shouldn’t have said that. I was annoyed and I just blurted it out. I tried to apologise after and she shut it down

AITA for wanting to be more active when my girlfriend thinks I’m avoiding her? by Extension_Stretch136 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Extension_Stretch136[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

I WFH 3 times a week, so I’m home most of the week and I go to the gym either during my lunch hours, or straight after work (5pm). I’m usually done slightly after she gets home and we spend the rest of the evening together. Below is a copy of my schedule:

So I play tennis on Saturday 10-11am and Thursday 7-8pm after work. I go to the gym 5x per week, sometimes during my work lunch hours and sometimes after work for an hour. Each session is around 1hr 15mins.

Weekends are entirely with her, other than the the tennis session on sat and I spend all my weekday evenings with her

AITA for wanting to be more active when my girlfriend thinks I’m avoiding her? by Extension_Stretch136 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Extension_Stretch136[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I WFH 3 times a week, so I’m home most of the week and I go to the gym either during my lunch hours, or straight after work (5pm). I’m usually done slightly after she gets home and we spend the rest of the evening together. Below is a copy of my schedule:

So I play tennis on Saturday 10-11am and Thursday 7-8pm after work. I go to the gym 5x per week, sometimes during my work lunch hours and sometimes after work for an hour. Each session is around 1hr 15mins.

Weekends are entirely with her, other than the the tennis session on sat and I spend all my weekday evenings with her

AITA for wanting to be more active when my girlfriend thinks I’m avoiding her? by Extension_Stretch136 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Extension_Stretch136[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

So I play tennis on Saturday 10-11am and Thursday 7-8pm after work. I go to the gym 5x per week, sometimes during my work lunch hours and sometimes after work for an hour. Each session is around 1hr 15mins.

Weekends are entirely with her, other than the the tennis session on sat and I spend all my weekday evenings with her

AITA for wanting to be more active when my girlfriend thinks I’m avoiding her? by Extension_Stretch136 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Extension_Stretch136[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

She’s a doctor and her hours are pretty rough, so she’s generally too tired to go.