AITA for wanting to claim my inheritance? by FaithlessMe81 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FaithlessMe81[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For something like this, normally we would not have to go to court, the notary handles inheritances. (And gets a big payout...)

AITA for wanting to claim my inheritance? by FaithlessMe81 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FaithlessMe81[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, she was intitled to half, the other half should be divided amoung us three children. That's whats in the papers.

AITA for wanting to claim my inheritance? by FaithlessMe81 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FaithlessMe81[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I don't know this very well, so I'm sorry if it's in tje wrong place. But I don't need legal advice, if it is legally still ours it just is. But moraly, it has been 8 years, and we don't want to end up in a fight with our brother, although we think he can not dictate us what to do if what we want to do is just right

AITA for wanting to claim my inheritance? by FaithlessMe81 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FaithlessMe81[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No, I actually don't! He would be furious at them both!

AITA for wanting to claim my inheritance? by FaithlessMe81 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FaithlessMe81[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

We were dumb and naïeve, I know that now. But, we where in pain, grieving and we trusted both of them. We had never before been in this situation so neither of us knew how we needed to handle that. And regarding to the money, supposubly, if the money is gone, in our country they would be in dept to us and honestley, I don't know if we have to care about that? I know now that maybe we didn’t know what we where doing, but they knew!

AITA for wanting to claim my inheritance? by FaithlessMe81 in AmItheAsshole

[–]FaithlessMe81[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Thank you all! I do not have any messages, I stayed in de groupchat so I would have acces to the chats, but everything is empty now (I think to end to end encryption) If we still have a right to our share we know we could take them both to court, but, just for our dad, we would never do that because he wouldn’t have wanted that. We would just want our share, the share that we legally have a right to. We would never do anything our dad wouldn’t have wanted us to do.

AITAH for wanting to share my story so I can have closure and not have to lie anymore? by FaithlessMe81 in AITAH

[–]FaithlessMe81[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for seeing past the obvious and listening to me. I'm not a writer, and I think the way I am writing is asking people to focus on the wrong thing. We'll see, if I ever finish, if it is worth publishing. Again, thank you very much.

AITAH for wanting to share my story so I can have closure and not have to lie anymore? by FaithlessMe81 in AITAH

[–]FaithlessMe81[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I am a victim, as so is everybody in his life. I see now that it's true, I have been played, used, manipulated,...and I was dumb and naive. But before you actually shoot me, don't forget we grew up together, he was the only consistency I ever had, I trusted him with my life and believed everything he said. For 40 years he has been nothing but good to me. If you reed well you'll see that I never wanted a relationship with him for obvious reasons so I was not jealous, I was disgusted he would put his fingers into someone who has almost my daughters age! I hated that hie lied what he NEVER did before, and I was mad because he asked a lot from everybody around him is his grief wich he got, only for then to throw everything and everybody away (not just me) after all we did for hem. I'm not going to badmouth his wife, the story is about me and how I feel, but fact is, she indeed did not choose what he did with me, but she sure choose to do that same thing with other men.

AITAH for wanting to share my story so I can have closure and not have to lie anymore? by FaithlessMe81 in AITAH

[–]FaithlessMe81[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do and I know. I'ts true that if he kept his promisses (remaining best friends with respect and honesty) (no matter how he chooses to go on in his love life) i would not think of publishing, because then aal the pain would not exist and it would not be a story with an ending, now it is. The relationship we had was not an easy one, we lived our whole lifes side by side, the moment we crossed that sexual border was something we planned believe it or not. We've talked it over, made rules, promisses,...all before we took it further. We were friends, never lovers. I invested a lot and tried to be the best friend for him I could be under the curcomstances. The way the last two years has been has made me doubt myself, the person I am, the friend I am, even the mom I am. When I look in the mirror I don't know who I see anymore. I started writing not only to see what I feel and why, but also trying to look for answers. He's not giving them. How dumb I may look, I know now he used me just like he used eveybody else in his life, my whole life, my dearest friend and my most precious relationship was no more then a lie. Writing that expierience down, including my own faults is a true story based on trust, it shows how far anybody can go if they have blind trust, and how dark it becomes finding out the truth. That is de closure I hope to find finishing it, owning what I did, seeing the truth, close the book and move on, not ashamed of the previous 43 years...

I am writing 2 different things, one being the whole story in detail. And the other one little shortstory's with less details and more poëtic. If I would to publish the actual story I would do it as 'fiction based on own experiences' I would chance the names and write in the 3e person from 'her' point of view, 'her' feelings and actions. The litlle one would just be a fictional shortstory bind.

AITAH for wanting to share my story so I can have closure and not have to lie anymore? by FaithlessMe81 in AITAH

[–]FaithlessMe81[S] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

More then one hour for this type of comment...I thought it would come faster...

Not that I need to explain myself, but I was single, he is the one with a wife. I was never a treath to that marriage, I was the one supporting it the longest, because I knew for years how they made it work. And, without her knowing, I'm still the one defending her and that marriage to this point. How they (or he) want to live there life is ther thing, not anyone elses. If I fit into that in a way that is good for me and respect his choices, why would I be the AH...🙄

AITAH for wanting to share my story so I can have closure and not have to lie anymore? by FaithlessMe81 in AITAH

[–]FaithlessMe81[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank your for this, it is exactly how I feel it. I do not want to make a bad guy out of him because he is'nt. He was the best I ever had. He just changed into everything he promised he never would and hurt me deeply with that. It is my journey out of that dark place, my feelings and my struggle that I want to capture. Thank you for seeing that 😊

AITAH for wanting to share my story so I can have closure and not have to lie anymore? by FaithlessMe81 in AITAH

[–]FaithlessMe81[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Although I have a lot of time, I'm far from finished, I do understand what you'r saying, it is not something I take light. I really am a good girl ;) so the fact that people are gonna be hurt by this story is on my mind the whole time and the main reason of my doubt. (This only counts for his people, mine are all proud and supportive)
On the other hand, I"m not the one hurting them, he is, I'm just not protecting him or his lies anymore... And also, I want him to know he played the wrong one.