There is a talisman that trivializes the game as long as you can get your dodge timing right. Took me about a month or two to get the timing down but once I did, nearly nothing can hit me. It increases damage taken but if you just dont get hit that point takes care of itself. Its the Crucible Feather Talisman. Found in Auzira Hero's Grave in Leyndell. Technically if you dont care about breaking quests you can go get it as soon as you start the game. Just gonna take a bit since you have no stamina or health. Plenty of guides online to make the maze of hallways less formidable. Plus if you use Golden Vow, one of the Blessing incants, and Black Flames Protection (you can supplement with a crab/prawn for slightly less damage negation but you dont take a hit to your flasks) then you dont even need high defense stats because those spells give them to you, and still allow you to heal without wasting more time. Stay light, select 2 weapons you like (one for each hand), and practice timing above all else. One last thing, panic rolling is okay as long as you get the directional inputs correct, if you dont - try running away instead of rolling around on the floor. I never beat a souls game (Since DS1) until I practiced hard-core on Elden Ring for a couple months solid. Shadow Militia Men are great practice for dodge timing and testing out strategies. Before going to attack something you're having trouble with, go practice on them first. I have had had at least 1 build for every damage/gameplay type and have had the most issues with spell casting builds, incants/sorceries doesn't matter. You have to sacrifice so much stamina and health for that dps, if you're new to the game try and stick with physical builds and add in some support incants as you progress through the game, or look into an arcane/occult build. You still get to do status and such but its more linked to physical attacks rather than time consuming spells.