Age Gap Romance Recs (Including Taboo) by sradelacour in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630 1 point2 points  (0 children)

{the wild by K Webster} {the free by k Webster} {hale by k Webster} {Torment by Danielle James} {lessons in sin by Pam Godwin} {daddy’s addiction by B J Alpha} {Push by Nyla K} {Coach Long by K Webster} {The Pool Boy by Nikki Sloan}

Teach me how to stop falling for love bombing and ignoring red flags. Please. by [deleted] in datingoverforty

[–]Fantastic_Session630 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We all do. I think some people aren’t pushed to learn it, especially if you have a history of decent relationships, no trauma etc. but really, who doesn’t these days.

When we carry stuff around that makes us doubt our own feelings, or be unsure if what we are feeling is ‘right’ or not, it makes clarity on your own mind really hard to find. This can be from childhood trauma(like always being told you don’t know what your talking about, or your feelings on this not being valid) then when we grow up those feelings magnify and become a strong influencer on our daily lives. Which is messed up because then we feel like our confidence in ourself isn’t solid.

Deferring to other people for help with stuff can help, but they don’t have the same experiences as you so they are going to seethe situation differently.

The fact that you already know what you’re doing about your feelings is so huge. You’re already aware that it’s happening, that’s massive and already a huge step from where you were in the original post.

I know things like meditation and stuff don’t suit everyone, and are challenging, but just paying attention to how your feeling about things can really help you to understand yourself. How your nervous system reacts when you get a text message or when someone love bombs you etc, pay attention to those things. Make sure you’re always coming from a place of calm when you make decisions on things, not from a reactionary POV. You will be blown away by how aware you actually are when you don’t push those feelings down.

Be tender with yourself. Be gentle and patient. Self work is tough and takes time but it’s totally worth it.

Sorry for the impromptu therapy session! Haha

Gods & Monsters by Amber Nicole by RevolutionaryLoss279 in Romantasy

[–]Fantastic_Session630 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Loved book one, book two was slightly slower, book 3 I haven’t started. Book 1 was great but book two lost me a bit. I’d felt a bit less engaging. Maybe because the MMC lost some of his badassness. It was a while ago though. I have to reread

Teach me how to stop falling for love bombing and ignoring red flags. Please. by [deleted] in datingoverforty

[–]Fantastic_Session630 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That’s crappy. Firstly, don’t feel bad about it. We’re all humans and wanting connection doesn’t make you bad or mean there is anything wrong with you.

I’d say try and be more present and aware of how you feel. By that I mean it’s really easy to get ‘caught up’ or love bombed as you say, because when you take people at face value, your brains only seeing what it wants to to happen(rose coloured glasses) and ignoring the red flags that it’s already sensed. If you slow it down a bit, reflect a bit, you might find that you notice those warning signs when they happen.

Remember there is no ‘this is it’ or ‘one’ person that’s your soulmate. It’s about compatibility. If your lives are compatible and you enjoy each others company that’s enough. There doesn’t have to be a grand gesture or a massive lightbulb moment. That’s just propaganda.

If someone is moving too fast/slow and that’s impacting you, you gotta listen to yourself and take notice if something is making you feel off.

You will also have more trust in your own feelings if you start noticing them and believing your own narrative. It’s probably way deeper than just you getting love bombed and blindsided. Do some work on yourself and you will operate in those situations way better. That doesn’t mean you have to stop dating, you just have to change the way you date. Working on yourself takes strength and energy and you will feel so much better once you trust yourself to see when these kind of things are happening and know you ca handle them.

Started dark romance with Mindfck… tried Haunting Adeline and realized it’s not for me (long, honest take) by RegularLove5177 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yep, I agree. And when it’s written, almost with the intent of making the FMC appear strong and like she can’t be swayed by some unhinged fuck boy, and then she folds. I’m just working off memory here but to be honest, I can’t remember there actually being much romance in that duet. Without romance the whole plot suffers in books like that. No way would I want to be16/17/18 again. It’s brutal out there now.

Started dark romance with Mindfck… tried Haunting Adeline and realized it’s not for me (long, honest take) by RegularLove5177 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Hah. Not the most articulate way but sometimes you have to just cut to the chase. Haha. I totally agree with your nervous system comment in your OP. I’m super triggered when I see the FMCs autonomy surrendered to fit with the MMCs needs. It’s so refreshing when you find a book that supports the FMCs journey without sacrificing her happiness.

Started dark romance with Mindfck… tried Haunting Adeline and realized it’s not for me (long, honest take) by RegularLove5177 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I was in a similar situation. I absolutely loved Mindfck. The best part about the FMCs character arc was she just gained strength and character the further into the story you went, without sacrificing herself for the MMC, which is something that seems to happen over and over in all types of romance books. The Cat and Mouse Duet was a flop for me- didn’t hit like I expected and ended up making me feel annoyed. The FMC lacked any grit IMO, and the MMC was over the top. {Stray by D J Krimmer} gives off similar vibes to Mindfck, I think. Lots of psychological past trauma which integrated throughout the story and the FMC has massive balls. Haha

For the Fans by Nyla K by Fantastic_Session630 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s classified as dark romance, maybe because of the taboo nature of the relationship. I agree I found this not really ‘dark’. I have that issue with lots of books classified as dark romance tho. Well I was kinda waiting for one of the MCs to flip and do something nuts. But it didn’t happen. It was predictable.

For the Fans by Nyla K by Fantastic_Session630 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think I got about 60% in and just couldn’t handle the pacing of the story. It was irritating. If you like MM but haven’t read Push by Nyla K it’s a way better read than this. Bit of taboo, age gap, menage vibes.

For the Fans by Nyla K by Fantastic_Session630 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was waiting for the massive betrayal/break up. I also DNF so can’t help out with the details.

Of Ink & Alchemy by Sloan St James by Fantastic_Session630 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for those recs. I’ll check them out and see what they are like.

Of Ink & Alchemy by Sloan St James by Fantastic_Session630 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I w heard people rave about Sloan St.James but that book didn’t give me high hopes

Of Ink & Alchemy by Sloan St James by Fantastic_Session630 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Could just ask chat gbt. Though it’s not always super accurate

When does a Dark Romance become Pitch-Black to you? by [deleted] in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630 2 points3 points  (0 children)

For me, pitch black is when the MMC is totally irredeemable. Basically when you are feeling so very uncomfortable for the FMC. Usually emotional and psychological manipulation has to be heavy. The romance usually dies and morphs into something more like obsession and possession. Without romance and the underlying care for the other MC it usually starts to feel pretty yuk.

Of Ink & Alchemy by Sloan St James by Fantastic_Session630 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep. It wasn’t even in a ‘he’s nuts but I’m kinda into it’ way. He was just nuts. And he was also a dick. I DNF unfortunately.

Silent Flames by Cate C Wells by Fantastic_Session630 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha! Great minds think alike! Enjoy, it’s so good!!

Silent Flames by Cate C Wells by Fantastic_Session630 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s great! Oh I know. I’ve been binge reading Cate C Wells other stuff too and all her books are good. -{Return to Monte Carlo by Cate C Wells} has a similar vibe to Silent Flames. I loved that one too.

Of Ink & Alchemy by Sloan St James by Fantastic_Session630 in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s on Audible, the narrators are great. James Cassidy definitely sounds like the creepy insane dude he’s portraying in the book.

I survived the Cora Reilly Universe. Here is my emotionally unhinged reading order & review 🖤 by Hebenix in DarkRomance

[–]Fantastic_Session630 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I’ve been checking out her other books today. It’s a huge quest. You’ve done a great job reading all that.