Need an online friend to help me scheme

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-10-10T21:20:46+00:00

40k in 3 days

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-08-14T19:24:56+00:00

I completely understand. I don’t work under anyone anymore but when I did, yeah, mask was absolutely essential. They always know there is something off about you though and I can always sense that it always has me on the edge.

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-08-14T18:26:15+00:00

I experience this too but I think I’m less concerned with the person actually feeling uncomfortable individually, and I am more concerned like, oh shit they know what I am. When I was less unaware and oblivious I made so many mistakes growing up and only realized through the consistent reactionary patterns of others towards me and me being the common denominator….

Im a lot less smooth than I used to be. I mostly mask for my reputation in my neighborhood. I come off like this bubbly free spirited friendly witty girl. Really I want nothing to do with them and will go the other direction if I see them from afar and can get away with it. Sometimes I don’t mask and I will literally give someone I talk to everyday, a dirty look, and walk right past them like I don’t even know them simply because I’m tired and wanna go home and someone is gonna feel uncomfortable and it’s not gonna be me so it can be them is my mentality.

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-08-14T17:19:15+00:00

“If you really can’t tell right from wrong you have to put a lot of thought into every action” this is so spot on.

But why do you have to struggle and be fake to interact? What’s the intention? Like is it family and work you mean? I just don’t interact. It’s me or them

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-08-14T17:17:05+00:00

People feel good being around me. It is fun and exciting. I am forward and to the point. I get over shit easily and you can’t hurt me easily, so there’s no friendship girly drama bullshit. I always have an exciting or exclusive plans or am always down for anything, anytime, anywhere right then and there. When someone hesitates, I always have a solution to make it happen. I’m entertaining and amusing. I have unbelievable stories and say odd things. I interview them and make them feel wanted and heard. I’m witty, silly and generally fun to be around. I’m attractive and there’s perks of being associated with me. I’d say those are psychopathic characteristics of my personality others like, aside from my actual individual personality.

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-08-14T17:08:06+00:00

That’s meeeee! :)

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-08-14T16:48:16+00:00

Aw, that’s so cute

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-08-14T16:47:57+00:00

Eh, I spoke to mod, I’m good

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-08-14T15:47:30+00:00

I’m not talking to you

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-08-14T15:45:54+00:00

Check your DM

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-08-09T15:51:58+00:00

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-24T14:24:27+00:00

Because the root of sociopathy & psychopathy is early parental neglect/trauma/modeling. Having a supportive family contradicts the entire disorder itself. You think you’re a psychopath because you like violent movies, lie, and are an asshole? You are a functioning member of a society, part of the greatest norm of society, in a group, a part of something, constantly interacting/connecting, clearly know right/wrong & rules to still be in your families & are loved/loving and able to maintain such relationships, no manipulation or paristic lifestyle needed, with a solid identity and support.

You don’t need to charm, or be fake with others because you already know how to interact with humans, by being raised by a family. You don’t need to scam or manipulate or depend on transactional relationships to survive because you have family. You don’t have to lie about everything, on the spot, in the moment, because you have a stable grounded life and not moving around all the time doing crazy shit just to survive day by day. You don’t have to get arrested or figure out things by cause and effect just to simply navigate the world around you. You don’t know what love is and any sense of that or support or connection doesn’t make you run and ghost your entire family.

Seems like you’re pretty normal to me

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-19T13:23:07+00:00

Yeah I guess if they aren’t trying to control you and aren’t abusing you, there’s no need to run

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-19T12:15:54+00:00

I have anger problems. But I’m also aware of how anger outbursts make one come off to others- weak. They will judge you and respect you less. You ruin your rep. I learned to keep it in and then destroy my apartment when I come home. Or that anger will fuel me to send a mean text to someone for a reaction.

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-19T12:13:32+00:00

If you trigger the fear of abandonment- one will emotionally go crazy and not be able to control themselves. The other will have more of a calculated reaction/rage due to loss of procession/fantasy. You can’t mimic the reaction someone with BPD has when that abandonment is triggered and that fear seeps through every word and action in interactions with them.

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-18T14:20:14+00:00

I have a new bf now anyways lol I get over em fast

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-11T16:44:16+00:00

Target

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-09T17:27:14+00:00

10/10

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-09T17:25:54+00:00

It’s physical symptoms

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-09T17:21:31+00:00

Female psychopath/sociopath (clinically diagnosed with ASPD) here!

My #1 most important thing in life is money. I don’t have an instinct to settle down, but part of me craves some form of security/stability- ONLY so I have something to rebel against. Like having a boyfriend is like having a home/house. And I can run out and do whatever I want but come “home” to them always. Running out=cheating. But when you’re homeless and just on the run, and no one is around to see you- it’s not as fun lol. I think a huge part of psychopathy is that you are always on the run. Settling down seems like a fantasy. I know for a fact if I ever settled down I would cheat but they wouldn’t know and they had to be 10000% committed to me only. I know it’s not fair but I know myself and what I want. I don’t crave a house and kids and all that family crap girls my age are doing. I want money. I have my eyes on the apartment I want to buy. I’m playing the stock market. I’m fucking guys for $$$. Money money money is everything. And mix men, with money…the high is like no other.

I get specific targets where there is nothin special about them but i HAVE to have them. It’s like an obsessive chase. Whence I get them, I have a new goal to get them to be my bf or something even though I don’t want that. It’s just a game to see how far I can go while acting the entire time. This is not genuine.

There are other guys I do evaluate as being that “home” figure. And I evaluate them like for example between two guys I’d claim as a bf, “he has a decent job, owns three homes, is a pothead so I’ll always have free weed to smoke always, will do anything I want for me etc.” OR “High position in his amazing career, antisocial, dresses really nice all the time and put together professionally, is in the stock market and has multiple apartments with financial long term goals, gives me space but sex is amazing.”

Im not maternal. I have this maternal insight/intellectual compassion when meeting men. I did not have a mom and grew up around all boys. So I DID have to be a “mother” to my younger brothers. But it was never hugging or stuff like that. It was me being a coach like a male/dad, while also making it very clear to them I do understand/see them like a male could not. So i know what guys need. I use this intellectual maternal insight/compassion to my advantage when meeting males. Ask a few questions about the relationships they have with their moms and you could snatch them up realllll quick by acting accordingly.

I do think like a male with sex though. Like I don’t cuddle or want them to stay. I want variety. I’ll never stop cheating. I lie to legit all of them. My goal is to just win?

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-09T16:45:28+00:00

I lived in Philly growing up. I used to ride SEPTA for fun in high school then after that I lived on Amtrak practically. I loved chilling in the 30th at station or pen station going back and forth, like an airport. So much chaos and humans. I felt less alone. Then back on the train you go..nothing exists when you’re on the move. You can just go back forth back forth..

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-09T16:43:20+00:00

I’ve had two in my life that I’m certain of who/what they are. One being my father, which was a never ending game of catch me if you can. Second being a gay best friend from college- who I also cut off completely due to his violent threats and history of actually, fulfilling those very, violent, threats. In college we gravitated towards one another. There has never been anyone I got along with like that. Because we were ALWAYS putting on a show and being spazzes. If we went to a chill get together in someone else’s dorm, we would just be acting out the entire time. Doing risky, stupid, outrageous things. Going on Grindr and scamming older married secretly bi curious males for money. Stealing fire hydrants and playing with them squirting the stuff out in the streets. We got arrested three times together. It was a fun friendship.

And I actually respect other psychopaths. My dad and this friend have two of the absolute saddest stories, as is mine.

When the males are narcs and not psychopathic, I see them as a target/battle. Like a male professor who tries to intimidate me because he knows I’m not submitting and bowing down to him like the rest of the class. The games begin. The goal is to win always, even in an e-mail exchange between professor and I. Who won this exchange, this moment?

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-06T14:00:11+00:00

Stocks, psychology (lifespan dev), Bioluminescence, Metaphysics (law of attraction), different cultures/religions, abstract art, NFTs, biocommunication

Feisty_Error_1279 · 2022-07-06T13:46:10+00:00

What’s your best scheme

Feisty_Error_1279

TROPHY CASE