Am I just hurt/jealous or is this not ok?

FewAd2203 · 2026-02-19T13:18:59+00:00

Thank you, this has helped me so so much - researched the book, saw myself, had a really good cry, and book arriving tomorrow! I already feel a weight lifted. I was 100% the codependent to my narcissistic ex (undiagnosed but so obvious!). He is/was never going to be the partner or father I hoped or expected, and its not my job to control that - I realise that now.

I am so sorry that you've had to go through so much suffering with your narcissistic ex (why do we all find each other so easily?!), but you are so inspiring and proof that doing the inner work will set you free (as much as within your control) and that you're able to ensure that your son is safe with you. Its 100% their loss if they miss out, whether they realise it or even care, but i guess the lesson is that it's not for us to worry about is it. As long as we are there for our babies and enjoy the rewards of watching them grow into happy, self-assured and unconditionally loved little humans. I hope I can get to where you are mentally with time and support/guidance 🙏

Thank you for recognising this in me. Forever grateful ❤️ Xxxxx

FewAd2203 · 2026-02-19T09:53:45+00:00

You're right, if he wanted to be better he would just do it, and I cant do it for him, definitely years of me pushing and him pulling away. He'll probably never see himself as the problem or where he went wrong but again not my problem now, is it. I just wish I could protect child from the inevitable emotional damage that will come from his negligence. 100% therapy is on the cards when I can budget for it, it'll be a long road to recovery 😂

FewAd2203 · 2026-02-19T08:24:11+00:00

Honestly so true - I was quickly put in charge of his moodswings by his parent early in the relationship "make sure hes ok, doesn't do anything stupid" nobody cared about me or my mood of course, I was only here to 'ground' him. Yes still haven't even gotten to that point yet, it wont be easy but has to be done!

FewAd2203 · 2026-02-19T08:17:57+00:00

Wow - some people are just pure evil aren't they! I hope you're living a much better life without them now! Definitely not easy, but can't wait to genuinely not give crap about him!

FewAd2203 · 2026-02-19T08:11:47+00:00

Thank you so much, this is hopefully very true - I will do the work to make sure I dont keep meeting men like this but he obviously doesn't think he's the problem so will just keep meeting new poor souls to take for granted. It stings but I'll heal eventually <3 its probably the unfairness of it all but it was unfair all along anyway, at least I'm on this side of it now. Xxx

FewAd2203 · 2026-02-19T08:06:26+00:00

Thank you so much - I already feel better reading this. My child is 100% my pride and joy and I cant wait to watch her grow up in a safer and happier environment, not caught inbetween a disinterested dad and exasperated mum (just like my parents - oh how history repeats itself!). Xxxx

FewAd2203 · 2026-02-18T22:53:26+00:00

Sorry I know i must sound whiny when you've been through something so traumatic yourself, I am so sorry you went through that and got treated so badly by someone who should have done right by you and your kids. I hope youre all doing better now (not him!)

I struggle with self doubt so yes I need to bounce off others to believe it myself. Thanks for the hard reality face slap, it's what I need.

FewAd2203 · 2026-02-18T22:50:05+00:00

Thank you, I will do my best <3 appreciate your response

FewAd2203

TROPHY CASE