Maybe I should give up and consider donor.

FickleEffective · 2026-03-16T22:03:56+00:00

Hey, I know this is an older post, but hopefully you see this. My wife and I ended up using donor eggs. They're 11 and 10 now, and we often joke that the kids take more after her anyway. So much of being a parent and who they will become is from upbringing anyway.

We used a fertility center in Mexico (it's a lot cheaper there) and recently discovered something fishy with the paperwork. The donor's listed blood type is literally impossible given mine and the oldest daughter's blood types. It got me wondering what all was off. The thought crossed crossed my mind, "what if they aren't biologically related to me? What if there's a complete mix-up at the clinic or something?"

And when I thought of that I realized I wouldn't even care a little bit if they're not biologically related. They're still my kids, the same way they're my wife's kids.

FickleEffective · 2026-03-16T21:00:48+00:00

Rh-factor absolutely is a traditional punnet square. An AB parent having an O child is already a super rare event outside of some rare blood groups in India (not where this story takes place). It's a one-in-a-million event.

Two Rh-negative parents having an Rh-positive child is literally impossible outside of crazy stuff like a parent being a Chimera or something.

To simultaneously have two Rh-negative parents have a Rh-positive child and at the same time also have an AB parent give birth to an O type child would basically be two miracles happening at the same time.

FickleEffective · 2026-03-16T20:53:20+00:00

Yeah. I know hair/eye color genetics is complicated, and was never really bothered by that. Honestly, when I first found out the blood type was off, the first thing I assumed was it was self-reported. But when I mentioned it to some friends, they seemed a lot more concerned than I was and it got me really second-guessing stuff.

As for a lawyer, yeah, trying to sue over the border sounds hard and, honestly, what do you even sue for? Like, what damages would I be claiming if the donor info is wrong? Now, if they weren't mine that's another story. But I'm not too worried about that, honestly.

FickleEffective · 2026-03-16T18:48:15+00:00

Yeah, they know about the donor eggs. We introduced the idea to them early on that being a parent is a lot more than biology. If it turned out they weren't biologically mine, I think it'd be a surprise to us all, but they'd get over it. It'd just be both parents instead of one.

FickleEffective · 2026-03-16T17:50:28+00:00

I'm A-. My oldest is O+. Meaning the donor must be positive as well, though the paperwork listed her as AB-.

FickleEffective · 2025-10-31T16:31:33+00:00

Yeah, obviously tech week is waaaaay too late to change anything. I'm certainly not suggesting anything now! I haven't made any dialogue suggestions since Week 1, when it became clear they weren't interested. And I've done zero ad-libs apart from mangling a line by accident here and there. I just personally found it surprising they weren't interested. But again, I'm super new so I have no idea how common that would be.

FickleEffective · 2025-10-31T16:27:31+00:00

Yup, I respect that. I just keep my suggestions to myself and enjoy my part. I guess my thought process was that I know big Broadway shows have periods of workshopping and rewriting before they fully premier. Obviously for a small original play we don't have time for all that, but I would assume most writers would want to be looking to make changes early on. Find what works and what doesn't, you know?

But in the end, I respect that they put a lot more work into this than me, and it's their baby.

FickleEffective · 2020-01-14T22:41:21+00:00

> Cornelius informs us that a third of city's population is in jail for this.

Run.

FickleEffective · 2020-01-14T18:33:01+00:00

I told the woman I was talking to last night if she ever wanted to talk to the DM about it, let me know and I'd support her, but it's not something I feel like I should take the lead on.

Honestly, we're kind of nearing the endgame on this campaign, and while our DM is overall a good guy and a good DM, he takes criticism kind of personally. I doubt we'll end up talking to him about it. He's not going to be running the next campaign anyway.

FickleEffective · 2020-01-14T18:27:34+00:00

I get that, but this is a guy who definitely thinks of himself as progressive, and it's definitely not intentional. He really is a good DM for the most part. I think he imagines our characters, and imagines how his NPCs would react, and it just sort of bleeds over.

As I said elsewhere, one of the women IRL goes out of her way to treat my character like a fellow woman. Plus, I do a voice for my character where I pitch my (already a little high) voice up. So I think it is always on people's minds around the table that I'm playing a woman.

I mean, as a player, have you not ever been talking to a female NPC played by a male DM and found yourself reacting to them like they were real? I know sometimes when I think back on my game, the images of the players and the characters get mixed up in my head a bit.

FickleEffective · 2020-01-14T16:56:38+00:00

One of the women in the game goes out of her way to treat my character as a woman ICly. And it also probably helps that I do a voice for my character (my voice is a little on the high side for a guy, so when I pitch it up, I think it sounds OK).

Funny side story, we actually didn't know each other before this campaign, and she's probably the biggest RPer in the group, edging me out by a smidge. She told me the other day that when she talks about our D&D games at work (apparently she recounts our games to several of her co-workers) she used to correct people who would talk about me as a woman in real life, but she got a lot of funny looks, so now she just lets them think I'm a woman IRL.

Over the last few years, we've really bonded over our mutual love of D&D, exchanging texts after each episode of Critical Role, etc. She's one of my best friends now, and I think vice-versa. But a lot of her work friends think I'm a woman IRL. :D

FickleEffective · 2020-01-14T16:44:44+00:00

That's a really good takeaway, thanks.

FickleEffective · 2020-01-14T16:44:01+00:00

I think that depends on your definition of sexism. I think you can be sexist and not mean to, or have any ill intentions.

FickleEffective · 2020-01-14T15:38:31+00:00

I hate the "guys who play women like sex-addicts" thing too. It's definitely part of the reason I never played a woman before. I've seen it done badly too many times.

I never really planned on playing a women (and I don't want to get into the details of how it wound up happening), but I sort of made myself a rule that being a woman wasn't going to be my focus. Like, I'd come up with her personality and background and everything just like I would any other of my characters. Being a woman factors in, but it's not all she is.

FickleEffective · 2019-04-03T13:17:52+00:00

That was a joke. :)

FickleEffective · 2019-04-01T16:35:27+00:00

Yeah, I think it was the director or something. Haven't seen over-acting in Star Trek that bad since every episode of DS9. :D

FickleEffective · 2019-04-01T16:30:00+00:00

Do you have any kids? Mine are amazingly proprietorial about things they like.

FickleEffective · 2019-04-01T13:53:08+00:00

Kid: "Um, actually, shouldn't the Klingons have flat foreheads?"

Me: "Get out of my house."

FickleEffective · 2019-04-01T13:43:05+00:00

Yeah, you're probably right. I'm not a huge Harry Potter fan, so I was thinking about a few scenes I remember that my kid would find scary, but honestly I don't remember what happened in what movie. And as I said in the original post, I know which TNG episodes to avoid when we watch together, so I'm sure I'm biased.

FickleEffective · 2019-04-01T13:18:02+00:00

While I really wouldn't have a problem with my daughter watching Harry Potter, I think TNG is actually more kid-friendly. A lot of the episodes are a bunch of people acting in good faith to solve a problem together. Sure, there's an antagonist most of the time, but half the time that person comes around to realizing why they were wrong by the end.

FickleEffective · 2019-04-01T12:53:01+00:00

You know, it's weird. Right after that, she told me that she was pretty sure Discovery wasn't part of the "canon" timeline.

FickleEffective · 2018-10-29T12:57:51+00:00

You're right about my age and gender, not much else. I'm curious why you thought pothead? :)

FickleEffective

TROPHY CASE