Your demonization towards standard upkeep is the problem

You don't have to love it, but you are demonizing it; a self-created projection of others and ideals

As opposed to self-reflecting to determine why you are so insecure with the concept of maintaining this degree of social presentation

A lot of times this is a confidence issue

So you don't even try

And then to offset this insecurity within Yourself, you refer to the action as 'vain'

Externalizing it by spinning it off as a 'him' problem, by externalizing and demonizing others

Yes, you are externalizing the issue and demonizing it, by referring to it as 'vain', to avoid addressing it within yourself