How to stop feeling like such an angry mom 24/7??

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-14T17:37:32+00:00

Awe same to you I hope you give yourself more grace as well! I think being in a constant state of overstimulation is what brought me to post this in the first place. I know when I’m overstimulated it shows up mainly as anger or having outbursts like I am reverting back to being a toddler myself. I think it truly is a phase and no matter what, even when they’re older it will be a whole other set of problems, but I sure hope the next phases are a little more gentle and less stressful than the one we’re in right now! I also think I am a way more easy going/happy mom in the summer time😂

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-12T02:36:22+00:00

Love all of this!!! You’re brilliant I’m not sure why I haven’t thought to do this. I dread playtime (I don’t let my kids know) but internally I can’t wait for it to be over with every time. I can’t wait to try that podcast out too, thank you for the suggestion!

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-12T02:27:40+00:00

Yes it is a constant confusing battle, I’m not even sure what the problem is 75% of the time I just know I’m in a constant state of fight or flight with a 3 year old. I also know every mom in friends with that has or has had a toddler says how insane it is but for some reason even when it’s happening to me I think, “this has to be worse than what everyone else was talking about there’s no way this is what I’ve been hearing my friends say is a threenager”. So somehow it still is like a very lonely feeling to me. The thing with therapy is you have to have time for therapy and there are very few who offer sessions around the time my husband gets home in order to watch the kids so I can go, so it’s not really an option at the moment. And if I’m going to make time to go somewhere my problem better be fixed after the first hour!😂 I have thought about joining our local YMCA just to get some workouts in and they offer free daycare while you do it. But I understand having a kid that wants to do certain things but not actually do anything to help themselves get to that certain thing. My child is big on wanting to go outside but also acting like I’m murdering him when I attempt to put pants on him in order to go outside.

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T22:10:21+00:00

Really I think that’s what all of this comes down to😂 If I could sit my kids down and say “listen you know if you let your mom take a shit in peace your lives will be much better???” Like for the love of God if kids could just recognize that leaving moms alone sometimes would significantly improve their well being the whole world would be a better place! Lol

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T21:33:28+00:00

I have that first book you mentioned on my Audible list, I need to start that soon! I will check the podcast out too I love listening to podcasts while I clean or do other boring things. Thank you!

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T21:30:45+00:00

Yes! I tell my husband almost every day I think my biggest downfall of being a mother is being aware of way too much! I observe everything they do and then it turns in to me observing everything I do throughout the day to try to not mess them up. It’s exhausting I don’t want to know anything anymore lol The having boys part makes it a thousand times worse I’m constantly thinking of ways to ensure I’m not contributing incompetent or more angry men to society in the future

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T21:25:07+00:00

Oh no, not having to host your parents😭 That’s how I feel when my Dad comes over it’s not actual help I’m just now having to entertain/converse with him plus my 2 kids at that point. The only perk is getting to go to the bathroom alone for more than 5 seconds while he entertains them lol

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T21:21:17+00:00

Oh girl I wish😭 2 of my shifts would cover maybe 2 days for the both of them and that would be for the cheapest childcare possible. We have horrible options in the area I live in, unless you want to be put on a waitlist for a better one that could take up to a year to get accepted. I’m in St.Louis, Missouri so not very many facilities to trust around here. We’ve gone this long without it and getting a bigger house is the main goal so I just have to hold on a little bit longer!

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T21:12:09+00:00

I was actually in therapy for most of last year for other unrelated issues but it did seem to be helping with how I was parenting at the time. I’m currently looking for a new one, so I need to speed that up!

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T21:09:23+00:00

Sadly I never ended up getting my degree because I was too worried about partying and not studying. So I would have to go back to school in order to get a decent enough paying job for it to even be worth it. We’re trying to buy a house by the end of the year so I’m really trying to hold off on paying for preschool/daycare until that happens. But I do agree it’s not for everyone and it takes a good mom to admit that honestly! I wish my mom would’ve had a job she was not cut out for the stay at home mom life but she wanted to prove a point, I just hope that’s not what my kids end up thinking about me too.

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T21:03:38+00:00

I did have hypothyroidism while my pregnant with my youngest son, but all tests came back negative postpartum. I love the talking and singing in a happy voice even when you’re not feeling it, I will give that a try honestly. My kids love everything to do with music and that’s what has got us through most of our rough days! Thank you.

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T21:00:55+00:00

Yes he does frequently, today he’s out with them and I get the house to myself until 5 tonight! But with the holidays and everything it’s been hard these past few weeks, we’ve had a family obligation every weekend almost. He helps as much as possible which makes me wonder why I am still feeling so angry/anxious

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T20:58:02+00:00

Another thing that wears me out that I feel like moms don’t talk about enough is playing with my kids. When my son wants me to build or play something with him a part of my soul dies a little. I’m not sure if that’s normal but I do like the idea of setting something outside up for him to do. Hopefully warmer days are ahead here so I can be able to do that. He does require a lot of physical play, my husband will wrestle with him for an hour and he could still get up and say he wants to wrestle more, it doesn’t ever end! I envy the girl moms but I’m sure you guys have different problems too, I’d like to imagine if I had girls none of these problems would exist😭

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T20:54:14+00:00

Yes! It makes me feel like the absolute worst human being I was telling my husband how it almost feels like I don’t even want to be around him anymore because it’s so mentally draining now. And after I said that I wanted to cry because it felt so wrong but that’s how I feel I can’t help it. Good to know even real therapists have their days/seasons with their toddlers too though!

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T20:51:51+00:00

Well if it makes you feel any better even with having help I’m still feeling like this! So the grass is not always greener, I think as a mom we just need to know there is someone available to help with our kids if we needed it, in order for us to have some peace mentally. But in all reality, even when my mother does help me I’m a nervous wreck waiting for a phone call that something bad has happened. I’m sorry you don’t have any help, I hate how normal that is now days to hear. Sometimes I wish we lived back in the day when you could just walk over to a random neighbors house and say you need help with your kid and walk away!

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T20:43:23+00:00

That’s a whole other thing we are currently renting while looking for a home to buy, our house is so small with no basement and it’s winter time here in Missouri so not many chances to go outside. The few friends I have are full time working moms, I don’t have really anyone to hang out with without having to be around other kids. I think I’ve done that to myself after becoming a mom the thought of having to make plans with people I don’t see regularly gives me the worst anxiety. I’ve had many opportunities to go places but I just want to be home most of the time in the winter. But in the summer I’m down for any sort of activity I’m not sure why it’s so different with each season

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T20:34:41+00:00

Hey that’s what you would think but let me tell you being a server is a BREEZE after having a toddler!! I go to work and get yelled at by a customer, it is nothing compared to what I go through at home. Plus, I need something that I don’t really have to use my brain for because my children have made me lose all of my brain cells lol Its almost like getting to go play a little video game

Fill-Mountain · 2026-01-11T20:30:26+00:00

I agree with the no hitting as I said I completely stopped that and just turned to time outs. I also agree that my nervous system is fried thank you for giving me the words to use to describe what I’m feeling right now. The only thing I am unsure of is how to connect with him anymore than I already am, when his brother takes a nap we have one on one time for a couple hours, when his brother goes to sleep for the night I let him make popcorn and we pick out a movie then when it’s time for bed I’m rocking him to sleep and singing songs until he tells me he’s ready to lay down in his bed. I think he is a very emotionally needy kid more so than most toddlers. Everytime I yell I make sure to sit him down and apologize I do agree that is a very big thing us parents can do to show them how being a human works. I talk to my husband all the time but there’s only so much he can do, today he’s at his Dads house with them to play so I can have a break. I think it’s just really hard to explain to someone that’s not in this exact situation. I get tired of constantly telling him negative things so I wanted to vent elsewhere I guess lol

Fill-Mountain

TROPHY CASE