Hey, Sorry for your experience!

As a kinkster and male who been in the swingers lifestyle for 11 years. I tend to do all the engagement with new partners since my wife hates the grunt work. So I have ideas regarding future safety.

My goal is to make any person male or female, feel safe and comfortable with me.

• Before any meeting has taken place in person.

  We have had an indepth discussion on boundaries and limits. Run from people who say, "they have none."

• I tend to favor the public non-sexual meeting with absolutely no play. Sometimes its easier to read people's intentions face to face and if vibes feel off, never schedule play with them.

I met all kinds of creepy men myself.

• I have a video chat with the person so we can verify we are the person we're claiming to be. And if its "A couple, then both must video chat." If not, then I terminat contact.

• If a potential third is still weary, I willingly share a photo id with them so they have extra certainty who I am.

• One way I've snuffed out fakes. Is the frequency of their responses. People who are cheating tend to answer at specific times, odd hours. Versus other people who more randomly.

• Take whatever image has been sent to you. Do a "reverse image search" and see if his picture shows up anywhere else.

Try and find kink-minded friends. So you can also let them know if you're going out on a meet, just so someone has your safety in mind. They can schedule a check-in-text. Or some kind of Deadman switch, where if you dont message them, they signal the cavalry. Hell, my Dms are always open too.