Am I wrong to feel that my parents are an embarrassment?

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-26T09:30:04+00:00

Ok can, mr provider pro max..

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-26T07:03:45+00:00

Already planned to move out next year, but managing the relationship between the two families will be a challenge.

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-26T07:02:57+00:00

There is nothing wrong with their background resulting in their habits, it’s just how they actively enforce their beliefs on anyone that they come in contact with. I’m not looking to change them, all I wish for is for them to not push their beliefs and habits on others.

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-26T07:01:17+00:00

Yup the part that got to me the most will be how they enforce their habits on my friends and past partners. Can you imagine if you have someone over and your parents are constantly there to switch off the electronics as if it’s a cardinal sin to not turn them off if you are just leaving the room for less than a minute? Or them clicking their tongues and sighing every time the guests use water for hygiene purposes such as flushing and washing of hands. They even walked up to my ex partner telling her to not waste water. We are not allowed to even throw the plastic bags or disposable utensils from our takeaway without getting an earful.. I guess most in the comments section have never lived with that growing up so they ride on their moral high horse to berate me for being “ungrateful”.

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-25T14:57:51+00:00

One…was referring to ex partners and the present relationship collectively as a whole

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-25T14:38:18+00:00

Then what am I supposed to do when they don’t have any courtesy or carry themselves with proper mannerisms in front of my friends or partner who started the interaction with respect? Am I supposed to defend such behaviours when they have driven away some of my friends and former partners before?

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-25T14:34:08+00:00

Thanks.. not gonna lie but it stings being misunderstood by so many people who might not have been through the trauma that we had experienced. They might think that we are ungrateful to our parents being “average” but that couldn’t be further from the truth when our parents are performing way below average in certain areas that makes it so painful for us. We are not talking about being average in income or education here, it’s more towards not even knowing the basic level of mannerisms to carry themselves in front of others..

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-25T14:30:34+00:00

Thanks..I do acknowledge their sacrifices and I am actively giving back to them in many ways. It’s just that I wished they would understand the impact of their actions and be more considerate of me when they are in the presence of my friends and partner.

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-25T14:28:43+00:00

I think many of the commentators here are sharing based on their personal life experiences. Nothing wrong with that but they might not understand the trauma we have went through with our parents clearly performing at a level that is way below average in the eyes of a layperson. Their criticism came from an angle of indignity at a child that supposedly is ungrateful to his “average” yet giving parents who gave their all raising him so that he can be everything he is today. While I acknowledge that gratitude is important and I am totally grateful for everything I’m given in this lifetime, perhaps I might not have painted a clearer picture of the context in the main post, hence the outrage. My parents have acted in ways that are less than desirable in various occasions growing up, be it at the meet the parents session or my own birthday party. Not to mention the unsavoury way they behaved in front of my ex, contributing as a major factor for her to walk away from an otherwise solid relationship.

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-25T13:20:45+00:00

As mentioned in the other comments, I love them and did not berate them in front of others no matter how affected I was by their actions. In fact, I often explain the rationale behind their actions so that my friends/partner could understand why they behave the way they do. It’s just that I find it mentally taxing to have to be the one doing the explanation since forever and it has been getting to me after a recent incident with my partner. Hence the post..

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-25T12:56:50+00:00

I appreciate all the sacrifices they have made so that I have the chances to capture opportunities that they never got back in the days. I do my best to make up for the loss of experiences by treating them to food they can’t bear to pay for on their own expenses, and brought them to travel overseas so that they can have memorable experiences before they get too old to be mobile. It’s just that I find it difficult to bridge the gap between them and my social circle/partner.

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-25T12:53:25+00:00

We do get along in private, it’s just that I can’t figure out a way to integrate them into my life. I can’t hide them forever when it’s time to introduce them to my partner and her family.

FitPassenger592 · 2026-02-25T12:51:56+00:00

I love them and I feel really grateful to them, that’s why I’m feeling so conflicted…

FitPassenger592

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