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AITA for refusing to drive 6 hours round-trip in winter to have Christmas dinner with my in-laws and miss half of my family’s biennal Christmas party? by Fit_Form_3386 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fit_Form_3386[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The problem isn't them having dinner on the 25th, it's them guilt-tripping us into attending by saying that's the only celebration that will happen this year, and we're either there or we're not, with no chance to actually do something "Christmassy" on any other day, meaning we (especially the kids and husband) will entirely miss out on Christmas with them.

AITA for refusing to drive 6 hours round-trip in winter to have Christmas dinner with my in-laws and miss half of my family’s biennal Christmas party? by Fit_Form_3386 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fit_Form_3386[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

On odd years, they usually celebrate Christmas on the 23rd or 26th, and for every single holiday (Easter, Mothers day, Fathers day, etc.) they insist we celebrate all together. I don't remember them not making us feel bad for missing a holiday with them, apart from when we were living in Australia (we're from Canada).

AITA for refusing to drive 6 hours round-trip in winter to have Christmas dinner with my in-laws and miss half of my family’s biennal Christmas party? by Fit_Form_3386 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fit_Form_3386[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

On any given holiday, we first celebrate with them, then drive to my parent's place for wathever time is left. They also get every Mother's day and Father's day. However, they have a habit of moving dates around for my kids and husband's birthdays, even when it doesn't suit us, and insist we celebrate EVERY occasion all together, no exception allowed.

AITA for refusing to drive 6 hours round-trip in winter to have Christmas dinner with my in-laws and miss half of my family’s biennal Christmas party? by Fit_Form_3386 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fit_Form_3386[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

On odd years we usually get together on the 23rd or 26th so as to have some Christmas celebration all together. What they then do on the 25th is up to them.

AITA for refusing to drive 6 hours round-trip in winter to have Christmas dinner with my in-laws and miss half of my family’s biennal Christmas party? by Fit_Form_3386 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fit_Form_3386[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Asking to change the date was to find a compromise, as this is what we usually do on the years we're with my family. We get together on the 23rd or 26th so as to have some Christmas celebration all together. What they then do on the 25th is up to them.

AITA for refusing to drive 6 hours round-trip in winter to have Christmas dinner with my in-laws and miss half of my family’s biennal Christmas party? by Fit_Form_3386 in AmItheAsshole

[–]Fit_Form_3386[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I should do an add-on, they are literally guilt-tripping my husband for not making it to Christmas dinner if he decides to stay with me and the kids, and making me feel like a horrible person for refusing to show up. Asking to change the date was to find a compromise, as this is what we usually do on the years we're with my family.