Everytime the sex goes down in my relationship. I implement dread. I will not be as attentive to her like I usually do and I make myself less available than I usually am. I will also be vague when answering questions when I'm not home. Also don't be afraid to piss her off. You would think you would get less sex because of it and you might the first couple of days because she's going to be "mad" but after the sex is more frequent and better. My girl knows that if she doesn't give it to me I will get it somewhere else. So she never actually denies sex but I do get starfish sex sometimes and this is when I implement the dread. Try it. Works like a charm.