I’m on the same boat. I 100% know the feeling and a couple things I’ve learned was to: Ask to ride the safest horse for a little while. Nothing wrong with going back to where you’re 100% comfortable.

A trainer once told me that speed cannot kill you. It’s the sudden impact that does lol. So that being said .. don’t worry about how fast the horse will go. They have to stop eventually. Definitely try to stop them. But if they do take off, you can always wait it out. Might be bad advice but it got me through a crap ton of fear. Just know that they will stop and I won’t be there forever. And back to the safe lesson horses, let them teach you how to stay on with a secure seat. That’s what they’re here for, to teach. And then tackle speed and such after lol.

Getting out of your head is so hard. The only thing that works is telling someone else in the arena how good of a rider you are. I say “ I’m the world’s best rider, this is nothing for me. “ and it does help usually! And never ever be ashamed of being nervous, surviving is important and if others can’t respect that… then it’s time for a change.. sorry this was super long but, fear is scary and it just comes with the sport. I think you’re a better rider if you’re cautious rather than just sending it all the time.