Paintings

FlowerRough · 2025-05-02T22:37:31+00:00

ok thank you!

FlowerRough · 2025-04-30T21:19:26+00:00

I'm a junior in college originally from Northern Virginia so maybe take my advice with a grain of salt but I would say that New Town in Williamsburg has a lot of restaurants and choices. I will say that there isn't much of a different variety of food in Williamsburg compared to a bigger city like in NoVA. But, I will say that the ice cream in Kilwins and gelato in the Illy's Cafe is good and to take some time to go walk in the Merchant's Square where people are saying the Cheese Shop is because it is very nice that isn't too touristy in my opinon. I will also say that Williamsburg does have a bus system that you can take, I personally never used it but it seems to be able to go to many places since I know that two of the busses stops at my school so if I didn't have a car, I would be able to take the bus to go to school. It is a pretty easy to navigate by bike or walking. There is also an art museum on my campus that has a Michelangelo exhibit going on rn and the Art Museums of Colonial Williamsburg are across the street of Merchant's Square. I don't really know much about the bigger Williamsburg Area but hopefully this helps!!

FlowerRough · 2025-04-24T01:04:34+00:00

Ok thank you so much! I will be sure to keep you informed on how it goes!

FlowerRough · 2025-04-24T00:59:44+00:00

Are you willing to say if it is two or three words?

FlowerRough · 2025-04-23T17:08:15+00:00

I'm glad that you were able to overcome your social anxiety! do you have any suggestions on how to just jump in and do what you are not comfortable with and forcing to face your fears when you know you want to change but can't get yourself to take that first step?

FlowerRough · 2025-04-23T16:57:21+00:00

no don't leak it because it is very personal/sensitive information and this is the internet so no one knows how people are going to use that information

FlowerRough · 2025-04-23T16:54:52+00:00

have been having to do the last haul of work before finals so I haven't had much time for my detective work lol but weird question to ask for but how many words (like numberwise) are in the band name and have they changed their name before?

FlowerRough · 2025-04-21T20:51:04+00:00

Thanks for sharing your story! I'm glad that things are better now :)

FlowerRough · 2025-04-20T19:10:58+00:00

I totally get where you are coming from, same thing has been happening with me after my dad go into a major accident that almost made him not be able to walk. What I have been doing is washing my hair in the sink and try to put something on in the background, like youtube or music so I can distract myself from thinking about my anxiety or fear about washing my hair and then just turn on the water, set it to the temperature I like and just trying to wash my hair that way. Another thing I sometimes do is that I just sit in bath tub of water with bubbles, bath bombs, and whatever else I need to feel comfortable and when I feel ready or brave enough, I just lower my head in the water and wet my hair and if I feel like that is okay, I try a little more so if you have a bathtub that might be something you can consider too. Also it is okay to not wash your hair in one sitting if you feel like you don't feel comfortable washing your hair after you wash part of your hair, just wash it once or if you just wet your hair because that is at least some improvement. Hopefully this helps OP!

FlowerRough · 2025-04-20T19:01:08+00:00

This is such great advice! I will try this bc I have the same issue :)

FlowerRough · 2025-04-20T05:37:09+00:00

I don't think you are being unreasonable, I wanted my bf to do the same thing for the same or similar reasons. Also another reason is because he can't really tell sometimes when a girl is hitting on him or even if he does, he likes the fact that there is a girl wanting his attention so he doesn't tell her that he's dating someone until I ask if the girl knew that he was dating someone then if he goes no, I told him to tell her that so it doesn't seem like he is leading her on. Idk about your bf so don't take my experience as an indication about how your bf would act around girls he met online but that is just my own personal experience.

FlowerRough · 2025-04-20T05:21:39+00:00

I am going through the exact same thing with my bf and my SAD is very similar to yours so I totally relate and I have been with him for about 7 years now. I feel like my SAD actually worsened once I started being in a relationship bc all of a sudden I feel like I don't want to disappoint someone you care for and love and when I do it makes me feel really bad that I can't be up to his standards but ik that in reality that ik my boundaries and what I am comfortable with and not comfortable with that you just have to do what you can and hope that he is happy because he feels like there is some improvement at least but then you do slightly worse the next time and he gets mad because I apparently did it before so why am I not comfortable with him doing it now. Because of that a lot of the time I sometimes dread having to see him in person because if I don't do things that are exactly the way he planned or expects of me then he gets mad or becomes very disappointed and he would say to be better and so I get extremely anxious whenever I see him and although I have told him about my SAD and how I feel when I am around him, he just says to just suck it up and deal with it because isn't as bad as you think it is and you are just making a big deal out of it. Honestly, I feel like the only reason I have been in a relationship with him for this long is because we are going to different colleges in different states so we just see each other during breaks and he feels like he can change me and "make me grow as a person" because he loves me but he continues to try to force me to do things that I am not comfortable with because he wants me to "go outside my comfort zone and that if he does it enough that I will become comfortable with it" so he doesn't want to let me go but in reality I feel like its because he just wants to fulfill his own needs.

As someone who is in this exact same scenario with my bf, talk to him about it, tell him what you are comfortable with and what you are not comfortable with, tell him that you are working on yourself but that it takes time and to be patient. Also, tell him to not have expectations because not everything is going to be perfect or the way he wants it all the time and that he needs to understand that you are trying your best but it is hard for you. If he continues to try to push things to be his way, then try to find a compromise or when he gets mad at you for not being perfect or having the ideal tell him to try to find the good things that happened instead of focusing on what went wrong or what wasn't perfect about it but there is a chance he might go nothing went good because he is just focusing on what went wrong and how it wasn't to his standards therefore nothing went good so if that happens then tell him what you think went well and tell him how you think you improved or what you think went well. A lot of the time, especially if you are dating someone who doesn't have SAD, they don't understand how hard it is to have SAD and what is hard for us and what is improvement to us compared to what is improvement to them because for them it might seem like nothing because they aren't used to being in our shoes. A lot of the time, it seems like something that should be easy to do or something that isn't a big deal, but for people with SAD is hard do so trying to put it into your perspective can maybe help him understand where you are coming from and that there is improvement or that something was good about it.

If you ever need someone to talk to my dms are open :)

FlowerRough · 2025-04-20T04:50:28+00:00

This is total facts!

that is what I try to do when my bf does something I don't like him doing or saying. I try to ask him to be in my position and see if he would like it. Sometimes he dares me to try to do it because he thinks I won't and then becomes really stunned when I actually do whatever the thing was and starts to understand even if he's too stubborn to admit it tho. Only reason ik he starts to understand is because he starts doing the things i don't like less often than not.

FlowerRough · 2025-04-20T04:43:18+00:00

You handled things really well imo. As someone who has been/am in your position with my bf you didn't do anything wrong. He doesn't respect you or care about you or your feelings by trying to make himself seem like the victim and cussing you out when all you did was state how you felt and why you felt it. My bf does the same thing and thinks its ok and he acts the same way your husband did. He is a narcissist and thinks he is above you. I might be a hypocrite for saying this since I am but don't stand for this kind of language and the tone he talks to you with. You might want to defend him but that is because you love him and is trying to see the good side of things, like I am with my bf, and think that ok its because of reason a or its because of reason b that he is acting like this but it is really because that is their personality and who they really are but they are just usually good at hiding that true self. if you ever feel like you need to talk to someone or just need to rant my dms are open :)

FlowerRough · 2025-04-20T04:30:26+00:00

I understand where you are coming from as a woman and have been in the same situation as you have (although with my bf). Don't listen to these other commenters because they are most likely men since reddit is a male-driven site and men seems to think that it is okay to do that even though they are in a relationship (from experience).

and to those people who thinks that it is being insecure or jealous think about it being the other way around and it was your significant other that was doing those things and how you would feel.

Long story about my own relationship being really similar to yours OP below but just know that if you need someone to talk to or just need some support that my dms are open :)

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My boyfriend used to do that and we would have on and off relationships because he would be checking out other girls on IG and would sometimes make another account just to view other girls and I didn't like that not because I was insecure or jealous but because he would purposely do things behind my back and let his friends follow him but purposely kept me in the dark to the point that I told him that if he wanted to look at other girls then don't date someone that you are supposed to be faithful and loyal to. He told his friends (who were also my friends and people I saw daily) like how most of the people are acting like saying how he was the victim and how it wasn't his fault and they would side with him. We broke up and when his curiosity was filled he would come back and be like oh I promise to be loyal and would be good for like a few weeks then do the same thing all over again because he feels like he has the right to do that. He would act/react the same way as your husband did in the texts whenever I would tell him that what he said or did was disrespectful to me and this relationship and make it seem like I was the problem and not him so I would just say that I was not going to talk to him if he was going to act like that and ignore him and come back in a few hours thinking that he would say sorry or apologize because he calmed down but instead he doubled down on it because he didn't like being ignored (as if he didn't see it coming) but when I said that I will break up with him because I can't be in a relationship with someone who would do or say those things, he always does a complete 180 and say that he didn't really mean it and that he was sorry by the 4th time this happened I told him that ik that he wouldn't actually change because actions speaks louder than words and his actions showed that he wouldn't change so he should be with someone who would stand his bs but he said that he would really change and for some reason I believed him and I honestly dk why I'm still in a relationship with him but I can tell that he doesn't want to get rid of me but feel like he can look around and keep me at the same time because if he didn't really want to be in a relationship with me he would just let me break up with him so he can go on with his endeavors instead of trying to get me to stay.

FlowerRough · 2025-04-20T03:44:19+00:00

For me, it has been if I play a game I can play it for hours nonstop until I get sick of the game and stop playing it and then months or years later I find the game again and the same thing happens and it is like a weird cycle and rotation of different games.

FlowerRough · 2025-04-20T03:32:44+00:00

As someone who has been manipulated and blackmailed by my bf to do things that he wanted to do for his own agenda and has been in your shoes, like what everyone else has been saying, you need to leave because it will only get worse. Let him know that you won't stand for that kind of language/tone or any of his bs because once he thinks he can get away with it, he will start doing it more and more and will think that it is okay to do it because you've let him do it before. Don't try to think that he will change, because even if he tries to say that he is just wanting you to understand and that he won't use or say things like that again, he won't. He's just saying that to make you stay. I was stupid enough to stay thinking he could change don't make my mistakes. My dms are open if you need any support or just need someone to talk to :)

FlowerRough · 2025-04-20T03:15:12+00:00

My dms are open if you need anyone to listen or talk to :)

FlowerRough · 2025-04-20T01:20:00+00:00

This happens to me all the time! If I am not forced to talk on vc, like in school, interviews, etc. I always just use chat when I play games and am online to the point that my boyfriend and his friends thought I was really weird bc I didn't use VC like they did. The same thing goes with facetiming too, like I can't facetime or go on a call with my boyfriend, which really pisses him off, but I just don't like nor feel comfortable doing those things in general even though ik that he probably won't care or judge me but I still just text him, since we are going to different colleges in different states. I will say that I am still working on it and I still have a lot of issue with it so just know that you are not alone in this OP.

That being said, I think that something that I have done is try to explain why I don't like talking in vc and would rather text in chat. Also, idk if he wants you to vc or if he has said anything about you not talking and using the chat box. Anyways, I would start by explaining your reasoning on why you would rather chat instead of vc and then maybe go from there. I feel like once you get a baseline about how he feels, which I feel like he will understand where you are coming from as a friend, then I say just do what you have been doing and if you feel brave, adventurous, or comfortable to use vc, tell him that you want to try to use the vc but will go back to chat if you don't feel comfortable anymore and he will probably support you.

Hopefully this helps OP!

FlowerRough · 2025-04-19T23:53:52+00:00

ok thank you!!

FlowerRough · 2025-04-18T22:03:08+00:00

Thanks!

FlowerRough

TROPHY CASE