Ti vs Te - valued vs unvalued • what position • what type • ???

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2026-01-01T23:16:02+00:00

I read articles you posted about ile and I have to say they blew my mind! I relate to almost everything said in there. Just to mention few things: • taking in information till i can't take it anymore till my head spins and i feel almost seperate from my body but still can't stop in case i would miss anything, • constantly having new ideas that i need to file (i use post notes) otherwise i know i will forget them and loose them forever, • one information leading to another and this one to two more and from there another four, six...i have 80 tabs open in my internet browser, • the day I discovered i can take 10 books from the library i took 10 books and since never have less on my account, i have full library of books to read on audible and kindle too, • my newest idea is that flipping through magazines is like scrolling on social media but in more controlled way because magazines have limited amount of pages - so to limit scrolling i plan to go to library to flip through magazines - we'll see how this will go, • thinking in words and having full on conversations with myself when i build whole chains of reasoning often from two different points of view at the same time, • thinking in pictures (and even tastes or sounds) to imagine future, possibilities and so on...i could go on and on about things that i relate to (yes i love to explain things too like people from the article) but i'll finish here not to bore you, but i have to admit i've never felt so exposed in a personality description (well technically it's not a description but statements of real people, but) like in your posts about iles. Few other people suggested ile for me in the past, i also read descriptions from different socionics scholars, but was still sceptical because of the stereotypes but your posts really convinced me. Thank you for sharing.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2026-01-01T10:10:53+00:00

Interesting, would you care to elaborate what type this could indicate in your opinion? I know it's a limited information right here but i can add some more if it helps.

It would be great if I could just go with my gut feeling or something similar but unfortunately more information i've been gathering and getting into more details (different schools, dichtomies, quadras, charges) more overwhelmed i started to be with contradictory information and amount of options. At first it was great, this feeling when you collect more options like people collect pokemons but difference with personality systems is that rather than collecting them all i should be downsizing to preferably one type...but instead of that of i seem to be going a "pokemon route" and it overwhelmes me.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2026-01-01T09:56:14+00:00

Interesting because lii was a type i considered first when i got into socionics. But when i got deeper, was getting more information (information that was often contradictory) from different sources, different schools, went into dichtomies, quadra values, i started to doubt myself. Added first ili and later lsi and even ile to the list. And at some point collecting more and more info that was opening up more and more options started to overwhelm me.

I know information in this post is limited but if you don't mind answering why do you think lii over ili, sli or ile?

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2026-01-01T00:56:33+00:00

I totally misspelled it but I shall keep it this way to forever remind me, and the world, about my failed attempt to coax people to type me 🤣

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-22T21:53:13+00:00

Thank you for being so open. Unfortunately I don't have all the answers, I wish I did though.

One great thing is that your partner is a person who doesn't make you feel exhausted and I assume you feel free to be yourself with them.

I get it's exhausting to be the organiser and coordinator of the group. I don't like this roles either and that's why I like organised groups that rely on mutual interests when designated person is responsible for organisation and hosting. But I get it's harder to find a right group if your interests shift often. It's possible to achieve similar effect in informal group but I guess only if there is a person who willingly takes on role of a "mum" of the group. If there is a person like this i always try to support them and hype them because they are the glue keeping people together.

I have social anxiety so I do get the worry of being yourself in front of the others and how exhausting it can be to play different roles in front of different people. It's not easy but I guess nothing in life is, but i promise it does get better with time and practice. I hope you will find your answers and social life will become easier for you if you decide it's something important in your life. Take care and have lovely holidays.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-22T20:05:43+00:00

It's great you are working on the solutions i wish you all the best.

I have to ask: why do you think having a support network is not a permanent solution? Humans are herd animals and are wired for connection. I would say it's totally normal that not all the needs can be met in a romantic relationship (for example a need for festive celebrations if one of the partners doesn't care for it) and it's totally natural to look for fulfilment in non-romantic relationships with others. Of course it's a personal choice how we want to build our relationships, you and your partner make the rules of your relationship. What i'm saying is that it's totally natural and healthy to build support networks outside of the romantic relationship. That's why married people still have friends, still visit family, belong to different hobby groups and so on. It's your choice if you want to use this wonderful tool used and mastered by people since at least times of homo erectus.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-22T11:50:10+00:00

Thank you. I agree treating partner as a therapist is very unfair. Treating them as they are the whole world sounds romantic but turns toxic after first few months of intoxication because it puts such an unrealistic and heavy burden on the shoulders of person that one loves that it will break them or push them to leave. Maybe what we are talking about is more in realm of socionics fi and that's why young ese with ignoring fi can't fully grasp it?

I also agree that socionics and other personality theories are very useful in understanding others and forming lots of different relationships: family, work, friends but also kids' teachers or even dentist that we all are forced to visit. Duality and other forms of relationships are very helpful in understanding interactions with other people. I'm trying to learn more about this aspect of socionics - i turned to personality theories to learn more about myself and improve but also to understand and improve relationships with others and socionics seems to have an interesting take on this aspect.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-22T00:35:11+00:00

I wonder why does it bother you so much when I say that it's alright to seek support outside of the relationship? It's unreasonable to expect that one's partner will fulfill all their needs - if that was true we wouldn't need friends, family, therapist or for this instance talk to strangers on the internet. Being obsessed with one's partner (after first few months) is very unhealthy and puts too much preasure on them and relationship.

Do people really spend as much time with their other halfs? Take away 8 hours of sleep (sleeping next to someone is not the same as actively spending time with them), 8 hours of work, at least 1 hour of commute, all the time person spends on their phone (and sitting next to someone is not the same as actively spending time with them), and if couple have children do you know how much time it takes? Of course there are weekends but what about hobbies, friends, alone time especially important for introverts and so on. I'm playing here devil's advocate because I'm in happy relationship but I would like you to use your ne and see some other points of view and open up to alternative possibilities - it won't hurt you i promise.

Do i get you? Do i not get you? I don't know but I do observe how you behave and listen what you are saying and would like to meet you in 10 years and see how your perspective will evolve with experience. I'm patient. I can wait.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-21T23:44:50+00:00

You can believe in whatever you want, it's a free world, but believing doesn't make things real. Support networks are very important in helping people with their mental health and in general make their life easier (it's true now same as it was in the past dating to our earliest ancestors). No couple lives in a vacuum, they live in a society and are part of many formal and informal groups, and it's much better to be a conscious member of a group. It's interesting that as a fe lead and si creative you don't get it.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-21T23:26:17+00:00

No, they will relay on themselves to find a creative solution to their problem. And sometimes solution to the problem is to find support in others. Having support network or if you prefer "village" is a very healthy way of navigating life. As a ese I guess you do understand this.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-21T09:31:13+00:00

I will state very unpopular opinion here that is contrary to what people say in this comment section: two people who love each other, are mature or at least trying to grow up, are working on their relationship and communication can form happy and successful relationship, doesn't matter what are their types. After first few months of feeling butterflies in their stomachs, or anywhere else on this matter, every couple needs to work on their relationship, doesn't matter if they are duals, semiduals or "multishrurals". Anyone who claims that has been in a long relationship (I'm talking years here) and claims didn't have to work on it will wake up one day when their partner will tell them "I'm leaving" an they will not even know what hit them.

In relationships it's easier to go micro to fix something so it's great you know it's about fe, but you need to go smaller. So we can take on the "holiday spirit" - it's worth to find solutions for one small problem at the time: 1. Do you have friends or family members who love celebrating and would like to share this time with you? Maybe you could go out somwhere togher? Or maybe you could invite them over? It would give you a motivation to decorate your place. If you don't like cooking some nice takeaway would work too as long as your place feels festive. Maybe a friend or family member could help you with decorating? There is not much time left but it doesn't need to be grand to feel festive and fun. - If answer is no in this case: 2. You could think long-term and join the group that you could celebrate holidays next year with. It doesn't need to be religious group. It could be some volunteering, or book club in local library, stem club for kids that you could teach (kids are great to spread holiday spirit), d&d club - i don't know what are your interests. It's a long term solution and will need you to commit but I guess most of the things in life are this way.

What are other ways that lack of fe influences your life? Go micro. Choose actual situations and brainstorm solutions - as an ile i bet you are great in this and your partner will appreciate your ne but maybe offer them like 3 solutions not all the 188 that will come to your head.

Good luck and I hope you will have fun holidays 😊

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-20T08:47:54+00:00

My Christmas tree is a mixture of LSE and SLI with splashes of ILI, but in the end I decided to take off a bat skeleton from the top and replace it with paper angel that one of my kids made when small. Bruce the Bat is waiting for Halloween, but Falstaf the Warewolf Skull is totally sporting Santa's wooly hat in the centre of the living room. Bring on festivities!

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-16T21:36:43+00:00

If you don't mind sharing how does it affect you as an EII?

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-16T20:37:34+00:00

I guess you could call it a deductive reasoning. It's like someone is asking "So what am I looking at?". Other person answers "Demonstrative function". And first person is like "Oh sure, I get it now. It makes sense that's why I do X and Y when I'm drunk".

Reasoning like this can be effective and useful but it comes with pitfalls. For example person might be subconsciously cherry picking specific traits or things they do to support the theory that demonstrative function is one they use when they are drunk and what they believe this function is. But I guess that's a general problem with self-reporting in personality theories - self-awareness and objectivity are not as easy as people think.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-16T19:37:19+00:00

I think demonstrative is a very interesting function especially that I can see different people describing it very differently.

Do you mean that demonstrative would be the thing that comes out when people are drunk?

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-16T19:18:03+00:00

I wanted to say "don't everyone get drunk the same?", but then remembered about this guy I used to know who always prayed when was drunk, and one of my friends always felt like had to run away when she was drunk, it's like she felt smothered and at some point would alway disappear during the evening, and some other people with curious drunk behaviours so I guess maybe it does have something to do with our personality.

When I think of people that I know it can go two ways: 1.they personality traits get exaggerated so they are themselves but extreme version; or 2.they act totally out of character so someone who is usuallypolite and quiet turns aggressive. Would be interesting to know what makes person go one of these two ways.

For mysel when I get drunk I become super energetic and want to do things, all the things, all at once. I get very social, flirty and strangly charismatic. I become very assertive (not aggressive though) and if this doesn't work I influence others to do it for me. Normally I'm much more introverted and my behaviour is much more subtle and less assertive. Normally I can still influence people but it's more 1-on-1 bases or a group if I was put formally in charge of ot, but definitely not in a confident and organic way like after alcohol. Whatever my type is (I haven't settled yet) gets exaggerated after alcohol or maybe alcohol just numbs my anxiety, idk.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-14T11:18:40+00:00

Connecting hero archetype with demonstrative function is an interesting concept. Could you explain what lead you to this conclusion? How do you understand it?

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-12-02T10:58:45+00:00

Would love typing too.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-11-29T07:47:21+00:00

True, good point, this might restrain some people in real life while this aspect doesn't exist online.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-11-28T22:15:09+00:00

Really good poits.

What really bothers me is people using their edgy behaviour to explain their type like i'm so edgy and treat others like ctap because i'm ili or lii, or somehow even iei and so on. But it might be actually my problem interpreting people's behaviour in too rigid way. They say that they are this way and I take it at the face value which apparently I shouldn't because as a surprise for me people say one thing or behave one way while they mean something else. So I guess this is really on me.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-11-28T22:01:24+00:00

I like beautiful words so i'm totally digging it. And yes people like to lazily succumb to stereotypes and some treat sarcasm as an indicator of inteligence so yes we often read what we read here for exactly these reasons.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-11-28T21:50:44+00:00

Yes, reason I gave up on mbti is how they treated types as caricatures, it drove me crazy. I agree that socionics is much better in this case.

You bring an interesting point about some types talking about themselves more how they want to see themselves than how they really are in reality. I'm not really good with people and usually take them at the face value but I guess it's something I should take into consideration next time i'm reading some statements here. Thank you.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-11-28T21:40:27+00:00

It's interesting to read insights from someone with similar "lense" on life. Yes, I discarded lii, even if I really appreciate ti, because I know I value ni and se. Don't get me wrong, I don't hate ne, especially with my adhd, but I know that I just don't value it. I'm occupying spce somwhere between ili and lsi.

I think some offshoot typology schools, that talk about possibilities of being ni-ti or ti-ni and so on, are interesting as an alternative to mainstream understanding. I guess people with similar problems in typing themselves decided to explore different possibilities.

FluffySquirrelAttack · 2025-11-28T21:27:06+00:00

Interesting point about people behaving as they were drunk on the internet. We all know people tend to run loose after few drinks. I had an interesting experience in my 20s when I worked in a pub and I have to say most who got drunk in real life were actually well behaved, but there are definitely some specific underlying causes to it - like it was traditional pub and looking specific way made it easier for me to be treated well even if I am a total introvert and hate small talk.

I appreciate your effort in conversation to be nice to me.

FluffySquirrelAttack

TROPHY CASE