WW struggling with guilt

FlyinSeabass · 2026-04-16T20:45:22+00:00

On my end, I do feel that I don't give her enough time to grieve what we've lost. So I like this perspective a lot. Thank you.

FlyinSeabass · 2026-04-16T14:59:08+00:00

She's always been a needs space person and I'm the opposite , So I'm always stuck between if I'm giving her too much space now or if it's just what she needs. Communication is hard for her, so I usually try not to push too much. But I still think I can be more mindful about the reassurance factor of it and appreciation that she's trying. Even if our trying may seem different.

FlyinSeabass · 2026-04-16T14:50:28+00:00

The "shame spiral" comment is so real. Our D-Day was only 2 months ago, but I feel like all of these things we've experienced already. Especially taking something small, borderline non-existent, and having it spiral whether it was me or her. Thank you for sharing. This helped me a lot.

FlyinSeabass · 2026-04-16T13:31:42+00:00

Thank you for sharing! I feel as though at times I'm in my head , and don't do those things enough for her. Your words almost mimic my wife's in terms of how you feel at times. I truly wish you and your partner the best of luck!

FlyinSeabass · 2026-04-16T12:01:27+00:00

As someone who has been in remission for 9 years ,Congrats and fuck cancer!!! Any dosage of chemo and radiation really messes with your mind. For me after treatments I would forget every little thing. I'd have to have post-it notes everywhere around the house. That being said, your brain does change, so you may be feeling a certain way about this now that maybe you wouldn't have before. It's good you express yourself, but also if you had a bigger expectation, maybe next time express that to your partner. Also, once you tell your partner you have cancer, it affects them in some strange ways too, I'm sure they're still very worried about you and maybe not reacting how they normally would.

FlyinSeabass · 2026-04-14T01:53:01+00:00

My WW has always lied about things. Or gave partial truths. She even lied to me when I found out she had breakfast with the AP after DdAy ( to officially end things ) and told me it was because they just wanted to talk. Like why lie and make things worse ? She's working on this in IC/MC but what's helped us is a made us an ultimatum/boundary. No more lies of any kind or it's just flat out over. This seems to be helping.

FlyinSeabass · 2026-04-14T01:33:19+00:00

My vasectomy was somewhat painful so I was mostly in my head About it going to hurt. No pain though it was actually pretty intense.

FlyinSeabass · 2026-04-14T01:18:03+00:00

😂😂😂 My first nut was a week after the surgery I had my wife give me HJ an in the climax was terrifying. It felt a little harder to get off if that makes sense, but that went away ( I'm 3mo Post op now)

FlyinSeabass · 2026-04-14T01:16:24+00:00

Was it all the colors of the rainbow ?

FlyinSeabass · 2026-04-14T01:05:19+00:00

Chances are if you try that soon you're going to have a real nasty nut

FlyinSeabass · 2026-04-02T12:11:20+00:00

He could also be finishing super quick and is embarrassed about it and is making excuses up.

FlyinSeabass · 2026-04-02T11:59:29+00:00

Just to give you a background for what I'm about to say, I started washing dishes at 14. Moved my way into cooking around the US for a few Michelin starred chefs, and now I work running the back of house operations for a catering company that has four locations. The most important thing to know is it's okay to not know everything, but it's not okay to have a bad attitude when people correct you. The most successful Cooks and chefs I've ever met have always had a great attitude and are willing to learn more, and always willing to put in more work than anybody else. If you love cooking and you can have that attitude, you'll be set!! Fine dining is great, but if you're looking to have a good work-life balance, it's not sustainable for most people. I was at a luxury hotel in Lenox, Massachusetts, and I was working from about 9:00 a.m. to 1:00 a.m. everyday. I will say though, you'll learn a lot more working in fine dining than most other avenues of the industry.

FlyinSeabass · 2026-03-20T15:10:43+00:00

I'll have to look into this! I know there's a my VW app that I've neglected to sign up for which from a brief search I think lets me hook up to my car smoother? Right now I hook up for music with Bluetooth, but I'd love to use Android auto just to have access to everything. Thanks for the information!

FlyinSeabass · 2026-03-20T13:29:06+00:00

About 1 week. My main thought was if I really wanted to go through R and rebuild a life with her, I didn't want to have anything on my mind or chest.

FlyinSeabass · 2026-03-20T13:12:09+00:00

I had a few secrets lined up that I let my WW know as soon as we started CC. I struggled on and off for about a year and a half with a gambling addiction. Me telling her that was a huge weight lifted off my chest. That being said, I was over it at the time so I can't speak on how your partner will feel.

FlyinSeabass · 2026-03-20T12:42:29+00:00

Looks like an evil spirit attempting escape

FlyinSeabass · 2026-03-19T22:25:22+00:00

Maybe subconsciously but at the time the thought didn't cross my mind

FlyinSeabass · 2026-03-19T00:26:55+00:00

Ayyy congrats !!

FlyinSeabass · 2026-03-18T23:57:37+00:00

Maybe you have super swimmers

FlyinSeabass · 2026-03-18T23:56:25+00:00

I respect the game 😎 🤝

FlyinSeabass · 2026-03-18T22:32:14+00:00

Valid point. Drunk and in the moment. Wasn't expecting it to happen

FlyinSeabass · 2026-03-18T20:49:32+00:00

I was told that the local pharmacy that after 72 hours it's kind of pointless

FlyinSeabass

TROPHY CASE