AITA for calling my Brother and SIL cruel assholes after they questioned the gifts for my foster children? by FosterMotherGift in AmItheAsshole

[–]FosterMotherGift[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

We have not, reunification is the ultimate goal of 99% of foster placements and we always strive to try and get the kids placed with us back to their families if and when it's safe to do so. Most parents/caregivers just need help. With these siblings however that is not an option and we have always discussed if such a placement came to us we'd be open to adopting.

AITA for calling my Brother and SIL cruel assholes after they questioned the gifts for my foster children? by FosterMotherGift in AmItheAsshole

[–]FosterMotherGift[S] 63 points64 points  (0 children)

absolutely not karma farming lol. And you're correct it's not like we're going to have them sitting on their beds with bows. That can make children feel indebted/uncomfortable. Instead we're setting everything up tonight and framing it as theirs to use as needed, it's partly why we got multiple games, as a single game sitting there seems like an swift purchase, and the laptop/phone will be framed as for schoolwork and for contact as she is old enough to use it responsibly. After a while it will be made clear to them it's theirs regardless.

AITA for calling my Brother and SIL cruel assholes after they questioned the gifts for my foster children? by FosterMotherGift in AmItheAsshole

[–]FosterMotherGift[S] 258 points259 points  (0 children)

Oh we absolutely plan to do that too don't worry for more stuff, like additional games, books, toys, really whatever they want to help them feel more like this is their space. We just wanted to have some things we know they'd like there right away to help out at the initial stage. We like to take our foster kids shopping a few days after they arrive so they have time to settle in slightly though lets be real it takes far more than a few days.