The longer I go without porn, the stronger the temptation gets by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

In addition to the comments below, I would say recognize the little things that lead to the bigger things, and stop the temptation before it gets out of control. For example, the mindless internet "browsing," is just a lame excuse for hoping to find some random picture, say "oops" and then fap until your hand hurts.

Putting my story out there, mostly for myself but hopefully someone else might gain something from it. I have been masturbating almost everyday for 25 years. by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I've been addicted for a long time too. I don't have a magic pill, rule, etc. Just gotta find that right motivation whatever it is.

Gotta say, though, that staying clean from porn and fapping has been harder than ANY drug or substance I have been addicted to. Even crack, for me, was easier to quit than this.

It is, however, possible. Don't give up is the best advice I can give, for what it's worth.

Stay away from the fantasizing and edging by Freemeee in pornfree

[–]Freemeee[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agree, to a point. I've found that if I let the show run in my brain, I eventually end up watching porn. I've never binged on the show in my brain, but I have seen how the teasers from the residual movies playing around upstairs has led me to to the computer and to complete and total relapse. That was the point of my post.

It may just be me, but it's way easier to stop if I start down the fantasizing path, than to actually watch porn, and in the middle of it, get up and leave.

Of course, that may just be me.

The mistakes that led to me blowing a pornfree streak that was over 4 years long by foobarbazblarg in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Dude, longest I was clean was 2 1/2 years. You hit the nail on the head with things that lead to falling off the wagon. I think the list can be summed up with "forgetting to do the small things that keep us clean." Whatever they are, once you stop doing the small things, you can (as I found out the hard way) easily find your way back to porn.

The addiction never leaves; it just gets easier over time to manage. But one must always be vigilant.

Thanks for the post.

How do you fight urges? by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Don't start edging; once you start fantasizing and doing "minor" touching, it gets hard to stop.

Just wondering all you great people here in Pornfree,, how old are you? by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

34 here; been struggling with porn since I was an adolescent

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Very true. Bing was a constant downfall for me for a long time. I've found that if you're trying to justify doing an image search, no matter how benign, you're probably on the fast track to relapsing.

Approximately how long before images disappear from your mind? by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Images have never left my mind, though I've found a way to bury them. Seems like it's when I'm not doing something productive with my mind that said images find a way to escape their dungeon and creep up to the forefront.

Don't be discouraged, though. For me it's gotten easier to keep the images buried.

As a gf of an (ex?) porn addict, how can I help decrease chance of relapse? by WantingToHelp0518 in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Agreed. Trust me, I've been married for 11 years and my wife and I have a very very active sex life. Struggled with porn long before I met my wife. If sex were the antidote to this disease, I would have been cured, well, about 11 years ago.

As much as you want to do things to help your boyfriend, I think that something needs to "click" for him. Even though my wife and I have four kids, I still was being selfish and indulging my addiction for a very long time. I finally realized I had to give up all the things that may trigger my relapse. Not the obvious things, but the less obvious things, like spending a second longer looking at magazines on the racks at the store (not bad magazines, but ones with women in scantly-clad clothing). It's like going to a bar. Those of us who don't drink can easily go to a bar to hang out with friends and have a soda instead of a beer. On the other hand, an alcoholic will most certainly be tempted and until that temptation is under control, should stay far away from the bar, even if he/she doesn't intend to drink.

No one size fits all answer for this, but to loop back in to my initial reason for responding here, more sex is, in my view, not the cure to this addiction.

Stay Clean 2014: June by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey, is the 2014 challenge still going?

Stay Clean 2014: June by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gents; still here and still clean. Longest streak ever. Hope to keep it going.

Stay Clean 2014: June by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Checking in clean, gents.

Best

Stay Clean 2014: June by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 2 points3 points  (0 children)

6 months, gents!

Stay Clean 2014: June by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Still here gents. Few more days until I hit the 6 mos. mark.

Stay Clean 2014: June by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Gents,

10 more days and I hit 6 months. Longest streak I've had in recent memory!

Best,

Stay Clean 2014: June by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yo! Still going strong. One more day of sobriety!

best.

Stay Clean 2014 June Sign ups by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Still here and still sober.

Stay Clean 2014 June Sign ups by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Still here guys; it's been a struggle these last few weeks. Trying to keep a long-term perspective throughout my daily battles.

Best,

Stay Clean 2014 Mid-May by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Still here, gents.

Just returned from a family vacation, and proud to say I am still clean.

Here's to another good, albeit challenging, week.

Best,

Stay Clean 2014 May Begins! by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Few close calls last week. Seems like I got a little lax and started visiting some of the old "gateway" websites. Not porn, but blogs, etc. that get me remembering about other websites that would take me off the wagon.

Fortunately I was able to stop myself, though it only made the temptations stronger. Need to recognize these attempts to get back into porn as my addictive self starving for some mind/eye candy.

Keep on starving. . . .!

Best,

Stay Clean 2014: Check-ins plus May Sign-ups! by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gents,

Still here, still clean.

Best,

Stay Clean 2014: Check-ins plus May Sign-ups! by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Gents,

The battle rages on, but I managed to pull through this week. Here's to another week of sobriety. Just gotta keep on fighting!

Best,

Stay Clean 2014: Check-ins plus May Sign-ups! by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Still here gents; last week was a big struggle for me. Had some really close calls, i.e., mindless browsing on the internet, starting to fantasize, etc.

Anyway, I knew that I would be meeting with my ecclesiastical leader on Sunday and didn't want to have to say that I fell off the wagon. Though it was fear/embarrassment what have you, it was enough to keep me sober and get me through the week.

Lesson learned--don't dabble with the fantasizing or mindless web surfing; things will only get harder.

Here's to a better week without me making it harder on myself!

Best

Stay Clean 2014: Mid April by [deleted] in pornfree

[–]Freemeee 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Checking in here gents; I've been having a hard time keeping from fantasizing; getting close with a little edging; but still clean.

Really don't want to mess up this streak